An "almost rape" is not traumatic ? what ?

[Anonymous]

In pysch clss we were talking about rape and how the victim tends to be afraid and shy away from the opposite gender ( or same sex , whoever raped you) , then the class got into a debate about how a girl who was almost raped has no right to be traumatized ( about 10 guys in class thought so ) and should find sex and relationships as any other girl . The guys claim that since there was no penetration then the girl and I quote " should get over herself"

I was like seriously ? , so I want to see if this applies to a lot of other people .

If someone told you that they have issues because they were ALMOST raped , would you find them being silly because they weren't actually raped ?

[heatherlu]

I wouldn't go as far to say I've almost been raped - but I've been in situations in the past where the was some definite force involved on the other side and lots of resistance on my part. So yeah - whilst things never got as far as rape - and not even towards something which could be considered 'almost raped' - I can definitely see why being in a situation like that would stay with a person.

The worst thing about rape in my opinion, isn't having sex when you don't want it (although - yes - terrible) it's being forced. Feeling helpless and victimized; and that can be very traumatic regardless of how far things go. Of course someone in that situation - penetrated or not - would feel the effects of it.

The guys in this scenario sound immature and ill informed.

[elliesaur]

If you ask me, getting to the point where it almost happens is still terrifying. It's not the intercourse that makes it traumatising, it's the fact that someone can force that on you and you can't do anything about it. Even if penetration didn't happen, I'd understand how just getting to that point would give one nightmares later on.

It seems the guys in your class are either really immature or they just don't understand how an "almost-rape" victim would feel in those moments.

[katiesmuff]

Absolutely not! Those guys are very inmature, uninformed indiviuals. Anytime you are forced or almost forced to do something against your will it is traumatic and it doesn't necessarily have to be about sex

[Asker]

Exactly , I was just shocked in class

[ppfxxx]

Those guys are morons of course it is going to be traumatic. In fact because everyone reacts differently and every situation is unique it is entirely possible that a girl who was almost raped might suffer more than another girl who was actually raped.

[sa230e]

*Facepalm*. Well at least now you know which guys in your class to avoid. What a horrible thing to say. It's so depressing to see that there's still guys pedalling this crap.

[lz1988]

The guys are full of s***! I've been sexually assaulted (not raped) and it still makes me very un-comfortable around men. I don't think a guy can really understand fully because they can't understand about someone stronger and more powerful than them hurting them.

[dx021]

lol men engage in dominance struggles all the time

[Anonymous]

i have been in the position 2 times of almost being raped.. once a black kid grabbed me pulled me behind this house and ripped off my clothes.. and said he was going to "f" me and I hit him in the face and ran away.. he followed me home but I was too scared (I was 12) to say anything I hid in my room and cried.. 2nd time this guy and I were hitting it off at a friends house..my friend and her boyfriend went inside and me and the guy were in teh jacuzzi...he starts getting too aggresive I told him to stop he covered my mouth took my tampon out and tried to force himself on me.. I've never looked at guys the same.. I feel they have ulterior motives and I only feel safe in a relationship with someone I trust. and I have to get to know them before I even want to be alone with them.

[bigboi38]

I wouldn't think they were silly. That is something that is beyond traumatizing. I have had friends who have had this happened and I feel bad. I think it is crazy when someone guy or girl tries to force themself on someone else. It isn't right. There is nothing wrong with this girl feeling this way.

[carinabina820]

It is just as traumatic because you get the same Ed result of fearing it will happen to you. You still feel just as violated targeted and terrorized.

[Anonymous]

I was almost raped and it is very hard to deal with. The guy held me down, ripped my clothes off and put his fingers in me.. He was more then 2X my size, I don't know how but I kick him in his nuts and ran as fast as I could to my house. I was friends with this guy and also worked with him for over a year. This happened over a year ago. And I still can't have anyone teach me. It took something from me and I don't know if I will ever get it back. Yet its not as bad as being raped but it has effected me in so many ways. I'm a different person. So I hope people can understand that every one is different and it effects everyone in a different way. And if you haven't been raped or almost raped then you will never understand what we go through. Some are worst then others and I pray that it stops and never happens to anyone ever again. Sorry if this upsets anyone but I had to say it.

[Anonymous]

seriously? sounds like drama queen BS to me. yea sh*tty things happen, but if you dodged the bullet, then no it isn't appropriate to sob over yourself

I was actually raped (countless) times as a little kid, and the only time I told a girl I had issues because I was ACTUALLY raped, she left me. so nah, I'm not gana feel bad for someone who was ALMOST raped.

SMH

[elliesaur]

So you became an insensitive jerk because a girl was an insensitive jerk to you. Seems reasonable.

[Opinion Owner]

lol only the self righteous mind of a woman can tell someone who's been through what I have that almost experiencing it just once should be traumatic.

pathetic.

[Dannyyyyy]

I was almost raped by my brother when I was 7 years old. I remember him walking into my room and locking the door behind him. Then he came over to me and said something about sex and put his hand in my pants and started to touch me. I have had really bad trust issues and disorders since then!

[pepperspray17]

NO they are not silly! Look I was almost raped twice in my life so far, thank God I have been able to get away. It's a really scary ordeal ! I find myself looking over my shoulder to make sure there not near me . The people that say it's not traumatic have probably not experienced it.

[sunshineboy]

People only care if girls get raped. There met with overwhelming sympathy. If guys get raped everyone thinks its funny and hallarious.

[Asker]

No , they don't . I mean I wouldnt

[sunshineboy]

maybe not everyone but a lot of people do.

[KoolAidDrinker]

The correct terminology is molested, those guys had it wrong.

But they are right that a girl should get over it, that's silly.

[vmw2008]

You have no idea what you're talking about.

[Red_Arrow]

If the guy is attempting to rape the girls, that is attempting to rape. Molesting is when inappropriate touching happens without attempting to have penetration. Both are wrong, both cause longterm emotional problems, both are wrong. But attempted rape is NOT just molestation. Where the heck did you come up with that?

[KoolAidDrinker]

Vote Romney and shadup.