Is a 23 year old guy to old for a 17 year old girl to be dating?
I've always heard age is just a number...but there has to be a point in the age difference that's just to far.. right?
What's Your Opinion?
Most Helpful Opinion
Yes there is, and it just happens to be a law.
Basing my answer of the state you reside in (Louisiana) I found a web site that shows the law in Louisiana that details age of consent:
If you look at the description under the Felony clause, at parts A-1, and A-2, it prescribes the age range tolerance.
It appears in A-2, that the State of Louisiana considers age of consent for minors to begin at 15, if the older half of the incident is 17. Any younger than 15, and the 17 year old would be convicted of statutory rape.
In the case of an adult (over the age of 18), A-1 prescribes that the younger half would have to be at least 17. Any younger, and the adult would be convicted of statutory rape.
Based on this, it would appear that age of consent in Louisiana begins at 17 when considering adult relations. In other words, even though the federal government only considers you an adult on your 18th birthday, Louisiana believes you to be able to make adult decisions related to sexual intercourse at age 17.
Because I am not well versed in Lousiana statutes, I would suggest consulting with a legal professional such as a paralegal if this is something you need a definitive answer on.
Though I am basing my answer on what the written law of Louisiana states, there may be an amendment that was not updated at the time of this publishing, so be sure to cover your bases.
There's nothing worse than getting a loved one into trouble with the law.
What Guys Said 3
Anyone who says age is only a number is naive or a predator.
Age is _not_ everything.
But age _is_ important, for the reasons Jacquesvol mentioned.
"but there has to be a point in the age diffrence that's just to far.. right?" correct. here's a rule-of-thumb to determine if people's ages are too different. take the age of the older person, cut it in half, and add seven. this gives an estimate for the youngest person they could date and still expect that the two people would be in roughly the same stage of maturity, development, careers, and so on. for example take a 23 year old person. half their age is 11.5, plus 7 equals 18.5-19 ... this is the _youngest_ they should date.
but as you get older, this rule shows how age becomes less important. when he was about 25, one of my buddies dated a woman who was about 35. we thought it was fine, because they seemed like a good match. the rule suggests that the youngest she should date is guys about 26, so the numbers were fairly close.
this idea is not carved-in-stone, but is a decent rule of thumb...
Age is NOT "just a number": age means experience, liberties, occupations, a past, money.
You're a teenager, he's an ADULT.
He is one third of your age older, has more freedom, experience, exes(maybe an ex with a child somewhere) and money than you: a completely different life and legal situation.
IMHO he's too old for you (when I was 23, I was interested in girls above 20, not in teenagers)
Ask yourself WHY he's not interested in women his own age. (don't ask him, you'll just get the usual crap about you being so mature for your age)
What Girls Said 3
Age is just a number. But most people use that phrase when they are talking about older people in relationships. 17 dude? I really hope that you are just looking to have fun right now, or I hope that she is very mature. Any 17 year old I know is very immature not to mention still in high school. ALSO you might want to check out the LEGAL issues with this regarding what state you live in, in some states this is VERY ILLEGAL and you can b put in jail if you p*ss her or her parents off. I always say there is no point in being with someone if they don't have long term potential, even if you might not be looking for that now. Its still something to base who you are with on.
So looks like everyone has covered the legal issue and jacquesvol makes other points that are very true. I can say this, that not all 17 year olds run at the same level of maturity, just as not all 23 year olds do. But life experiences are big and the fact that the guy in this situation can drink, drive and have freedom that I doubt you can, it definitely would create issues. Further, I would seriously wonder at the 23 year old's motives. Some guys can be in to this because they can also have plenty of fun on the side and not get caught or because they see you as vulnerable and easy pickings to have sex with. You will have to do the best you can to determine what is going on here and take care to avoid the downsides that are being pointed out to you.