Search Results: what is love true love marriage

Simple question right? I will concede that falling in love with someone isn't 100% a choice, its a combination of attraction, and chemical responses. But continuing to love someone i believe is a choice.

Let me explain why i believe that.

Love needs to be nurtured. To maintain the relationship, you can't just expect the "Spark" to be there. Both sides need to make effort. Both sides need to do the things that maintain connection.

For example, Every morning when i wake up, i wake a half our prior to actually needing to get up so i can get extra cuddle time with my wife. When i come home from lunch i hug her, and tell her how much i miss her. When i come home at the end of the day i do the same, and then we cook together.. the important term here is Together. Hell even my furniture choices have centered around making sure that even when we are just watching a show together it means cuddle time. Additionally i took my grandfathers advice seriously, which was "Never stop dating your wife" So i make sure to do things like date nights, and spontaneous gifts, And by gifts, i mean things she's been wanting, to things as simple as chocolate. I tell her she's beautiful every day, and i tell her how much i love her every day. And this isn't one way, My wife does similar stuff for me.

Bottom line, if i chose to stop doing all of that, my wife would first think that there was something wrong, Then she would think that i was angry with her, and finally she would think that i dont love her. It would essentially kill the marriage.

Love, Marriage, And everything in between takes effort, Marriage is hard work, Its remembering to do the little things. Its making sure above all else that you have open lines of communication.

A lot of people fail to comprehend that, and i believe this is the reason for the horrific divorce rate.

See the following poem. it explains it quite well
https://hellopoetry.com/poem/1959983/love-needs-nurture/

Of course, I reached that age threshold years ago. It feels weird knowing some of my peers already have kids in middle school or are high school teachers.

Of course, my adolescent years sucked, but sometimes I miss the days when I didn't have to be an adult. I miss the days when I had those "rose colored glasses" where I didn't see many of these adults' true colors and how shitty they or the world really is. I miss the days when I had more of a support system and was given the benefit of the doubt when I was naive or made a mistake.

I never had a girlfriend in middle school or high school anyways. I didn't meet the love of my life and my first real girlfriend until I was 29. This is one of the few positive events in my life that brought positivity to my adulthood. We are about to get married, and it will be our very first (and hopefully ONLY) marriage. Better late than never!