Is she brushing me off or is she in fact "too busy"?

[activeguy1124]

So I was dating a woman for about 3 weeks that I met online. We had three dates and things seemed to be progressing very well. We were texting and calling back and forth every few days. things seemed light and fun. She is a teacher and has another job on weekends that keeps her very busy. We had a third date in which she came over and had dinner and watched a movie followed by a make-out session (no sex). She always thanks me for an enjoyable time after every date. We continued to text back and forth and when I contacted her for another date (4th) she says she is too busy and feels run-down from all the working, wants to take a step back, and says her time constraints are not fair for me. She also says she wants to focus on her finances for the next few months (ie. work).

Why all of a sudden now? She had time before. I feel confused by her actions and then her message. Is she just too busy or is she using the typical "brush off" tactic? I responded by saying I understand and that if she wasn't feeling anything I can appreciate that. She responded with "Thanks for understanding?" WTF? She hasn't contacted me in a week nor have I contacted her. Not sure if I should contact her in a while just to see and possibly get more explanation and see if she is interested or not. Not sure what to do?

[SWEETNESS]

actually, the too busy line is true. you knew she worked on the weekends. you knew she was busy. she probably is working or focusing on her finances. maybe she thought that she could handle dating with her schedule. if she hasn't contacted to you yet, don't fault her, don fault yourself. if you are curious about how she is doing. text her "hey, just checking on you. haven't heard from you in a while. hope you are doing well." and leave it like that. don't respond if she responds. and don't respond if she doesnt. apparently her work is consuming her, and a relationship wouldn't be fair to either one of you because her time would be restricted. a guy actually got upset with me when I told him I had too much to do and that wouldn't be fair to him because my attention wouldn't be focused on him but my work. you may think you are understanding, but its all about patience. I think you should just not press on about her. keep the realtionship between you and her mutual and light. move on because to her, work is her boyfriend at this moment because she may need money. you never know what someone is going through at the time.

[activeguy1124]

Thanks for the input and comments. One thing I don't understand though if she WAS interested wouldn't she at least tell me that or not? Her actions prior to the stepping back said yes, but now no. Also if she found me interesting and attractive and was interested, why would she let me go so to speak. Another woman may come along and then she's out. Seems risky on her part.

[visajoe1]

You already know the answer. It is unfortunate that she is unable to be clear with you and forces you to read between the lines. It's happened to me a few times and I think it is disrespectful. My advice, move on asap. Do not contact her anymore for any reason. An explanation? If she is weak enough to not explain herself, it probably isn't worth hearing anyway. Best of luck