Can you GROW to love someone?

I am going to share a friends personal experience. She was in her early 30's and was dating a guy for about a year. She had just been out of two relationships that lasted most of a decade. The first one she was together for about 7 years. After they broke up he was married in 6 months. The other guy she dated for about two years and nothing ever came of it. Now she has three siblings that are all younger and were married in this time frame. Seeing her, I was convinced she was not in love with this guy she was dating, and I was not the only one shocked when they announced their engagement. They have been married 7 years now. She is not happy. He felt her clock ticking and settled. She thought she would be in love with him, but it is more like two roommates living together. They often do things separately. Even when they go to family things, they often go in two cars.

This is a bad situation. Your not being fair to him or yourself. You need to be honest. If you don't love the guy then let him go and give yourselves the chance to find people who will complete those parts missing from your lives. No one likes a pretender. And love is a feeling, an emotion, that is held in high regard by our society. So do yourself a favor and save yourself a lot of trouble. Practice good ethical judgement here and go find someone who makes you happy. If we only loved people for who they were on paper, then everyone's paper would look the same. Blank and empty.