I was seeing a guy for seven months, I thought we were deeply in love. everything was pretty good, we had our arguments, but we became best friends. everything moved really fast but he told me every day how much he loved me and meant to me. well, out of the blue, he started acting like a jerk. I told him he needed to treat me nicer. after a long talk, he told me he doesn't know what the problem is, he needs to be by himself, wants a break, etc. he said he wouldn't be dating anyone else because he knows leaving me is a dick move, but its what he wanted. well, two weeks went by and I didn't hear anything from him except that he doesn't know and he needs time. I found out from one of his old friends that he's been trying to get back with his ex. he would constantly talk about how bad their relationship was, how much he hated her, and I guess they had a lot of problems. why the hell would he leave me to go back to her? the last thing I said to him was that he doesn't need time, I know who he chose, and that I hope it works out. of course, he didn't have anything to say back to that. but I really don't understand. I know I shouldn't talk to him ever again. but I'm wondering, why he would leave me for her in the first place for this girl who hurt him so bad? he knows me and him had something really good. will he ever try talking to me again, and will he end up regretting this later? does anybody know from past experiences how a guy will act once he does something like that?
What's the best thing to do when he leaves you for his ex?
When you think your world is crumbling from a heartbreak, pause for a moment with this thought. There are many good guys who are looking for a lady like you right now. That could change your mood.
In my last breakup, the following tips worked for me. It could work for you too:
# Step 1 Accept you can't switch off your feelings for him. Embrace your inability to your thoughts and feelings about him or the breakup.
# Step 2 Feel the pain of breaking up. Diverting focus from the hurtful feelings slows your recovery.
# Step 3 Accept he is no longer with you. Nursing hope and trying to win her back was a big mistake I made in my first breakup. It only heightens your pain and prolongs your recovery.
# Step 4 Bask on the good memories he brought to your life. I made the mistake to focus on her weaknesses, convincing myself she wasn't my type. I was merely lying to myself because if she wasn't good enough I won't have been with her in the first place.
# Step 5 Remove items likes clothes, cosmetics, pictures, etc. you associate with him. Block and delete all his contacts and social media, such as phone number, email address, WhatsApp, Facebook, Instagram, snapchat, etc. Block even his close friends if necessary. No direct or indirect contact with him whatsoever. He should not know how you’re pulling on and neither should you know how’s he doing.
# Step 6 Engage passionately in a new or abandoned hobby. Thanks to my breakup of 2015 I took up fitness as a hobby to take my mind off the pain and gives something I always look forward to doing daily. I now run 10.5miles per run and do weight training, combinedly 5 days a week. I’m in the best shape I have ever been—from 92kg to 78kg.
# Step 7 Draw inspiration from a previous breakup or personal life challenge. I reflected on my very first breakup. It dawns on me I had a new girlfriend months later. I then flashed my mind back to the current breakup. I then questioned myself: why am I even feeling sad? It suddenly changes my mood. It's like telling myself I have been through this before and came out stronger 6 to 12 months.
The best thing to do, is walk away and move on. Because he was not over his ex, and you were just a rebound fling and once he realized that he went back and tried to work things out with the ex.
As experience has tough me, if someone is talking about their ex all the time. It means that they are not over that ex, and you are just a rebound who will get tossed away when they either get over the ex or go back and try to work things out.
A big sign that you are a rebound, is that someone is always bitching about an ex and your relationship is moving really fast.
My boyfriend of one year did the same just this week, but it was his ex that had left him three years ago and she told him in the summer (while I was on vacation) that she loved him and regretted leaving him and that she would not interfer in our relationship because she liked me and how I treated the kids). I told him it was a matter of time before she broke us up. He disagreed. She had done this many times before but his relationships weren't that serious. and I know that she was freaked about the fact that we were nearing a year. I could feel a distance and after a fabulous trip to Tokyo this past week he told me he was giving it another shot. #5 on the roller coaster for him. He also said the last time, either it works or it does not but he has to do this. Note: he never truly completely separated as they still shared financial entities and other aspects that bothered me. I told him he was a fool to walk away from this a return to someone who constantly belittled him, and his friends have told him the same. I also told him that I would not wait for him and he was playing "craps" in this game, and I will probably be with someone new when he comes to realize she is the same. Unfortunately they had a 20 year history and she had cards (manipulation and guilt) that I don't play nor have. And I knew he still loved her so she knew that she would get him back. It hurts and when we finally had our face-to-face (most discussions were on the phone - no fault of his as I brought it up), I was able to walk away with my head held hig because I had done everything in our relationship with honesty and integrity. This will truly be his loss, but mine as well for his was the first long-term serious relationship I had after my horrible marriage of 19 years broke up. He did show me how to love, be loved and that I was worthy. Now to move on, no contact, no email reply, nothing. Girlfriends when the woman leaves the man, and he still loves her you can't compete with how he still feels for her and you will only have 85% of his heart. We deserve 100%+.
your situation sounds just like mine. Only our relationship was 3 and a half years together. And he ended it to get back with her. 6months on when i had nearly gotten over him he came back saying he wanted me. But was with her now , they didn't sleep together , he didn't love her like he did. He just felt sorry for her and he missed the naughtiness we had. So stupid me gave into him twice thinking I could use him as friends with benefits , like he was using me . But It sent my head west so I have had no contact for 34 days. He keeps texting me asking whats wrong to saying he misses my smile , which was the last text I had from him last week. Only to find this week he has changed his profile picture on whatsapp , to him and her? Sending my head fuzzy again and asking
Awe hun! I'm sooooo srry, I know how you feel, in my opinion he wasn't over her in the first place, it's kinda like girls. We can pick asses for the one we love and no matter how much it hurts us we still hold on to them hoping they'll change. Although you were there for him and gave him ur heart and soul things won't always go how you want without an unexpected turn, maybe this is a sign that he wants you but he wants to make sure he can stay with you and be faithful, I know that sounds weird with the situation, but that's what happended to me, we dated for 8months, the he broke up with me out of the blue and said he needed "time to figure things out" I gave him time and he went with his ex the bitch down the street from me so I was seeing him no matter what. they broke up after a good 3 months and he canme rihgt back to me, I asked him why I should take him back and he said "I really do love you I just had to make sure all old flames with her were over and they are, Ur the one I want to be with,I'm srry I hurt you I didn't mean it but if you take me back I swear I won't break ur heart ever again." So yeah... I knoww he hurt you but reallly give him a little bit if he doesn't get his head out of his ass but they , then he really wasn't worth ur time. you dserve someone who will ALWAYS love and care for you no matter what.
If he tried to get back with his ex just two weeks after he dumped you that means he was never really over her. If he talked about her throughout your relationship, even if the things he said about her were bad...that still means she was on his mind. If he did make a mistake he'll have to figure it out on his own. There's really nothing you can do. Just let him go, because if he acted like a total jerk once for no reason and left you,who's to say if you two did get back together he wouldn't do it again,and trust me it hurts just as bad if not more the second time around.You should move on. He's not good enough.Find someone awesome-er! Good Luck!
Ive had the same situation too this guy I was talking with for 3 months left me for his ex after everything I did for him, I just wanted to make him happy & he doesn't see it it hurts because I still like him & I feel so much anger with him for how he did me, I just hope later on he regrets it & realizes how he did me...
If he was constantly talking about how bad their relationship was and how much he hated her that goes to show he was never over her. If a guy is talking about an old relationship that often it should be a red flag that there are still some feelings there. Guys who are actually over a relationship will leave it behind them and focus on their relatinoship wtih you. He obviously was never that into you and was using you as a way to forget about his ex. He prob began talking to her while you two were still together which made him want her even more. Just let it go, be glad you didn't waste any more time on him. Don't ever contact him again, and don't ever think about going out with him again. He is selfish, and wasted your time. The only time he will regret this later is when he: gets bored of her, old problems come back, she doesn't want him anymore. He seems pretty ballsy so there is a chance you will hear from him at some point in the future. DONT ENTERTAIN HIM!
It's not easy to figure out another person's reasons and motives, but from my experience , though I don't have a lot, it has to be something along the lines of his personality. By that I mean he has a lot on his mind thinking about his ex cause for some , me included, getting over someone is like an impossible mission. It doesn't matter how bad the realationship is or gets. I emit that is was super hard for me to get over my ex. You did the right thing, you shouldn't dwell on it. It's very possible for him to try to get back in touch with you if what he's doing doesn't workout. If that's the case I wouldn't give him a second chance, even though I know how what it feels like to beg for one, it really isn't worth it. The way I see it he had his choice to stay with you and he chose wrong so he doesn't deserve you.
I know the feeling. Worse thing ever, take it this way. Glad he is gone because he isn't the right one for you. Taking a break in relationship I think never ends in good terms like. I never like the idea of 'break' one should know the feelings and express it maturity. No don't contact him, he has made his choice. Best thing is to move on, going to be tough but time heals. Do whatever you enjoy the most, hobbies etc.. spend time with friends and family and talk to them. It will heal but never contact or go back, it will end up making things worse
This has really worked and I am proud to testify of it. I saw a post on how a lady got her man back through prophet munak who helped her to get her Ex Husband back. My relationship was crashed down for 3 good years and some months. Although I do believed in spiritual prayer since when i was a child I reluctantly tried him because I was desperate but to my greatest surprise munak helped me to bring back my man and now my relationship is now perfect just as he promised. Getting your ex back permanently spell does not only bring back someone you love back, but it will also re-ignite your lovers feelings for you to be as happy with that person as possible. My man now treats me like a queen and always say he love me all time. If you are passing through difficulties in your relationship Email him for urgent help. holyprophet8@gmail. com
You have to realize you don't NEED him to talk to you again. This guy obviously didn't care about you enough to make you his number 1. You don't need to prioritize someone who wouldn't do the same for you. I'm sorry this happened to you though, I know it's going to be easy. But try to stay strong and focus on your goals in life. What you yourself want to do or out of life.
he probly doesn't really know what he wants, and its just trying to get "the best deal" out of what he can. for some reason he assumes she's better than you in whatever terms of judgement he has inside his head. will he regret it? probly in a way, but not an emotional one. seems like the manipulative/fake type. youve dodged a bullet. best of luck
You miss the feelings he light up in you, memories of good times. When you try to take it out of the picture, you're left with a guy for who you are second choice, do you want him?
I personally was dumped for another guy and I still miss those times, want them to come back but without her as she did not turn out to be worth it.
You know, he has hurt you right now, but you still want him right?
Same for him , she hurt him and he's still not over it and wants her back.
You should let him leave and not take him back anymore either because obviously you're his second choice.
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Ahhh lovely I’m so sorry you’re going through this, it’s awful! My impression is that if he’s talking so much about how he hated his ex it’s because he still has feelings and isn’t over her. He should never have pushed things with you in the first place and you really deserve better! Xxx
Let him have the last word. That way eventually hell go crazy not knowing how you feel. Do not reply!!! Post pictures of yourself on a fun girls night out. Go to the club and do some dancing. Have a good time! Eventually hell see what he lost and when and if he comes back to you, you have full control. Don't let him get you down.
He was in love with his ex when you have started dating, but was hurt because she break up with him, so he needed ego boost. When her ex have seen that he is with other girl she got attracted. its in human nature to seek what others have. So I doubt that he was in love with you for a second. Next time be more picky when choosing a boyfriend. Find someone valuable of you, somoene that will protect you and never leave you.
When who does what for the what-what? Who? What? Sorry, but did someone actually anything? Must have been a bad chili fart, because nothing and nobody who MEANS A DAMNED THING was around you. That's what you do. You had a brain fart. You goofed. You are BETTER THAN HIS BITCH ASS.
Because guys love girls who treats them like shit not valueing the ones that do everything for them. Dont be a goody goody anymore. And move on. The minute he sees you well and happy he will be back.
The problem with that question is it has so many variables, now maybe there is a part of the past he isn't filling you in on. With someone like that it is best to move on so your heart stays whole.
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