GF dumped me. Said she doesn't want to hurt me anymore? But she never did?

My girlfriend just broke up with me. She said she was tired of hurting me. I should mention she is battling depression and anxiety. I did everything I could for her. Stuck by her and supported her but she was convinced she was a burden to me; which she wasn't. I told her she wasn't all of the time. Now she dumped me and said she was tired of hurting me. I can't get through to her and she won't even give me a straight answer on why this is for the best. What do I do?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Being depressed doesn't mean she's totally out of her mind or anything. She knows what she's doing. You just have to as to talk to her either on the phone or in person as calmly as possible. Don't throw a bunch of words at her, or she'll feel overwhelmed. She's really fragile at the moment. I don't know what makes her think she's hurting you, but I want you to know that depressed people are NOT crazy. She knows what she wants and she knows what she's doing. You just have to CAREFULLY make her understand you. I used to have a mental disorder and I don't know how it feels to be on the other side of things so the only advice I could give you is to try to get to her REALLY CAREFULLY. Remember she's like a piece of glass right now; sharp but fragile.

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    • She doesn't want to see me cuz its too hard for her to talk and she doesn't want that to be our last conversation. She just wants me to accept the break up. We have been texting tho. But every time I tell her im not hurting and that I don't care about this and that I want to be there for her she tells me to stop caring and move on. And every time I tell her I was never bothered by the depression and that she's not a burden on my life she gets upset and tells me its over? Not sure what to do?

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    • The weird thing is The longer were apart the worse she gets. she's always been at her happiest when were together. But because she thinks im hurting she thinks she's protecting me and that its for the best

    • send her flowers

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What Girls Said 2

  • My new ex of a week and ahalf told me the same exact thing. He had an emotional break down and didn't want to hurt me. yet he never did. He said he wasn't good enough for. I thought he was freakin perfect for me. We were best friends. I seriously dont know. I think they honestly do too much thinking and wrong words come out.

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    • That's the thing. They over think everything to death and she has told me that too. Its getting them to stop thinking that way about us and just be happy with one another is what im trying to figure out. I know she needs time but im afraid of giving her too much time

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    • Yup exactly. I told her ill respect the break up but I need to know why this is for the best and why I still can't be there for you? Especially when she tells me im her comfort zone and tells me how happy I make her? Yeah I don't get why having someome in their life is so bad? There doesn't have to be any pressure, labels or committment

    • Well he finally pulled his head out of his butt and we are back together. We will see how this goes.

  • take it as a blessing that she left

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    • It might be for the best but I don't think its a blessing. she's an amazing person who is just in a dark place. We've never even had a fight. Its just hard not knowing what to do. Im afraid I giver her to much time and space to find out she's gone forever

What Guys Said 2

  • Maybe.. Maybe you should just give her space and let her come to you. Trust me, there's nothing you can really do if she's really not wanting to talk to her. Avoid asking her questions. Sometimes when a woman has made up her mind, there's no changing it. I Just kinda went through the same thing. You're in a losing battle. Just give her space and if she wants to talk to you she will. You'll just end up pushing her farther away.

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    • My ex told me the same thing.. It's probably deeper than what it is.. I've been through something similar... Listen to her and respect her decision..

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    • Yeah I really have no other option but to move on with my life. Its difficult walking away from a relationship that was nearly perfect except for depression and also walking away from her while she's going through such a difficult time

    • Sometimes... Things seem good based on your mindset... You could be thinking it was perfect while on the other hand she wasn't.. Good luck to you..

  • You can't blame her entirely, because she's having mental health issues. I have battled depression and anxiety for the most part of my life as well, so I know exactly how she should have felt. No amount of reassuring from you, would make her feel better. But depression and anxiety are quite manageable.

    Don't lose hope yet, once she's got the issue sorted out, she may very well get back with you. :)

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    • What should I do then?

    • What is the extent of her issues? i mean... is it too severe?

    • Her issues are pretty common. But for some reason its all just too much for her. She also is incapable of talking about it with anyone about it. I'm not sure what I can do for her. she's doing ll of this because she thinks she is hurting me

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