My GF dumped me and I acted like I didn't care, bad move, should I tell her how much I love her, i'm not begging her though that is pathetic?

[jdotkidd93]

Ok so basically my girlfriend broke up with me a week ago, our relationship got really intense and serious really fast, she's liked me for like a year but we didn't speak as i had a girlfriend at the the time. She recently broke up with her ex and we started speaking again, maybe because she liked me for so long and i liked her aswell we didn't do the whole go on dates thing we literally were friends for about a month nothing dodgy or anything just friends while she was with her boyfriend, when we started speaking though her boiyfriend was violent so it was coming to an end she just didn't know how to cut it of completely, she was even telling my friends how she doesn't deserve to be with a violent guy and how she wants a gentlemen who will respect her and love her like me (when we first met i walked her home after a night out since then she thinks im a gentlemen i guess). Anyway she was saying all this while we was friends and while she was still breaking up with her ex so u can imagine once she broke that off we got together instantly within like days we were sleeping together seeing eachother everyday, doing everything together like a couple.

Anyway so i think because she didn't have time to get over her breakup and rushed into a relationship with me it caused problems, when we broke up she said she loves me but wants us to break up and go back to seeing eachother when we want etc without the pressure of being in a relationship and talking about marrying eachother in the future etc as it's too much for her. She said she doesn't want to see anyone else aswell, what does seeing eachother mean? Like sex and a casual relationship without the seriousness?

Anyway when we broke up i was like it's fine showed no emotion at all it was a nice break up i mean we spoke for hours laughing and joking straight after the break up chat. I do love her though should i express that i don't exactly want our intense relationship back though, but should i let her know i care?

Updates

+1 y

She seemed a little suprised that i wasn't like devastated by the news because she said it wass a really hard decision, tbh i knew it was coming and i couldn't deal with the lack of commuication etc because she was acting weird and distant before so i kind of wanted it to be done and us to commuicate so i didn't care. She was telling me i love you but its not the right time etc and i never said it back and acted like i didn't care at all. Should i tell her how much i do love her.

[TannerBear]

Just be honest with her, tell her you have strong feelings for her and you'd like a second chance.

[jdotkidd93]

You reckon, thing is maybe i'm stubborn but i don't like begging people. I mean i know how it feels to want to break up with someone and once u can utter those words your gone like obviously i could have been like i love your please stay and perhaps she may have stayed on an emotional whim because obviously she loves me so i could remind her about the good times and convince her to stay but for how long, we would break up again because we hadn't resolved the issue of us breaking up initially which is us being too intense and serious.

So i don't know i mean i'm not going to be her friend like that isn't going to happen, i will be honest and tell her i love her and appreciate the fact our relationship was too serious but want to still see her be with her etc but without the pressure i think that's what she wants but i'm not too sure i need to ask her tbh

[TannerBear]

Being friends with benefits is not as satisfying as an exclusive relationship... You're gonna be unhappy

[tattooedhandfet]

I think first and foremost, u need to ask her, her definition of seeing eachother

[jdotkidd93]

Yeah your right well i'm pretty sure it means being intimate and being more than friends just without the pressure of being in a relationship? She said she doesn't want to see anyone else though which threw me off a bit, i mean if you don't want anyone else and still want us to "see eachother" exclusively isn't that just a relationship? But tbh i think maybe us "seeing eachother" means that because its not a relationship there is less pressure. I mean when we was together i'd have to speak to her everyday and all the time but now were "seeing eachother" i guess i've gone a couple days without speaking to her and there's no problem at all whereas if we was together that would not happen and if i did it would be an issue like what's wrong why ain't we speaking etc.

[tattooedhandfet]

Yes I do understand. If u love her so deeply, please tell her. Make her understand how u feel. As for seeing eachother I agree It's less pressure than being in a relationship. But u both need to be honest if u decide not to c eachother exclusively. I believe u need to let her know where u stand. But I hope u don't get hurt. Best of luck. Talks like this r never easy. I'm preparing myself for the talk of a life time as well

[jdotkidd93]

Thing is i do love her but i think taking our relationship down a notch to just seeing eachother could help us in the long run uno so i have no problem with it, i still love her and want to see her so i'm going to let her know where i stand on that. About the exclusively thing we will talk about that aswell i hope your talk goes well remember communication is the key. The whole reason why we broke up in the end was probably because of lack of communication maybe if she communicated her issues with me instead of letting it fester inside we could have stayed together and taken it down a notch but everything happens for a reason we will see how things go.

[tattooedhandfet]

Ty so much. I feel the same about my SO he never communicates so this has been a long time coming. I think it might end so I as m prepping myself now by shedding a few tears

[jdotkidd93]

Same thing i did i kind of went through all the emotions of breaking up before we actually broke up that's why when i told her to commuicate with me as to why she was being distant etc i kind of knew it was coming so i was ready for it which is probably why it seemed like i didn't care because i wasn't shocked i was ready i mean with the way we werent talking if she was like nothing is wrong i probably would have ended it or at least told her we can't continue like this because it was healthy at all uno.

[Anonymous]

So much drama. First never go after a damsel in distress. Women who claim abuse need to get A LOT of help before dealing with relationships.