After being together for 2.5+ yrs, my boyfriend broke up with me unexpectedly last fall. We go to different colleges 5 hours away but have the same hometown. We talked a little here and there throughout the year but I tried not to because I was hurt. He said the reason for our breakup was so we could see what was out there but then had a girlfriend 2 months later. Over Xmas break he said they were having some problems but trying to work through it. Now we are both home for the summer and last week he told me he still has feelings for me, he thought about me all of the time at school, breaking up with me was the biggest mistake of his life and he wasn't happy with his current situation and didn't see it being anything forever. When we were together we had the perfect relationship, everyone thought we were going to get married and he even gave me a ring for my birthday last summer. I was shocked by what he told me last week so after thinking it over I told him OK lets try being friends first and taking it slow. He liked that idea but he hadn't broken up with this girl yet. I told him he needed to break up with her for us to be friends otherwise I couldn't trust him. He said he tried but it wasn't that easy. We have talked for the last week and he kept saying he knew what he needed to do (implying breaking up with her to be with me) but that he was having trouble doing it. He said he hoped, but didn't expect me to say I still had feelings for him. I know I shouldn't wait for him, especially since he can't break up with her, but I do want to get back together. I don't know why he can't make a decision. He keeps saying he needs time to think about all of this and that he doesn't know what to do. I don't know what to do to help him make his decision. I don't know what to do about any of this. Any input would be great, thanks.
Most Helpful Girl
I have been in a very similar situation "I want you back but I can't break up with my girlfriend yet because it is difficult " ? ... If he is doing that to his current girlfriend then I am not sure he really is such a good guy at all. He is certainly not being loyal to her and she obviously means something to him otherwise he would have no problem in ending his relationship. He said that breaking up with you was the biggest mistake in his life and now that he realises that he wants to jump straight back into your life. You have got to show him that he cannot expect you to just be there because HE has decided that's what he wants, and however much you want him back then under no circumstance should you even consider being friends until he is single again. I know relationships work second time round but I would have no trust in this person, purely on how he is treating his current gf. Will he change for you ? . I hope so but at this moment I very much doubt it. Be strong, you do not have to put up with his indecisiveness as he said he doesn't know what to do... you can easily make his decision for him ... just tell him you are not interested. Hope this helps and probably not what you want to hear but if he can't make a decision then that tells you straight away that he isn't really serious about you and always remember he hurt you once and may possibly do it again. Move on and upwards, you are so much better than that :D0