I accused my boyfriend of cheating me because I found him getting text from other gals and few other changes. And he got very upset and decided to dump me over phone. But since I have stuff over his place we are meeting for one last time. So I have one last chance to convince him to stay. I love him and don't want to breakup. any help what to do
Most Helpful Guy
If you suspect him of cheating then end the relationship. If you accused him of cheating when he truly didn't, then he has every right to dump you. What's going on here is a lack of trust. You obviously didn't trust him and now he knows you don't trust him because you accused him of cheating.
Is he going to forgive you and you get back together? Maybe, but how is he going to know that you won't pull this crap again and accuse him a second time?
Additionally, if you suspect he was or is cheating, what evidence do you have that he wasn't? Because he got upset and dumped you?
That's not evidence that he didn't cheat, but it also isn't evidence that he did. Maybe he was upset because you showed that you don't trust him.
Or maybe he was cheating or was planning to get together with one of those girls, then you called him out on it and caught him red handed, so he went Nicholas Cage on you and over acted to the point where he turned you into the bad guy here by being overly upset... And you gave him the right ammunition to break up with you while trying to still seem like the good guy, leaving himself wide open to see this other girl without truly cheating because he is now single.
You went with your gut, you had signs pointing to him talking to other girls behind your back, and there was a real chance that what you suspected was indeed true. If all of this was innocent, why was he hiding it? If this was all innocent, then why didn't he just explain what it was all about and tell you the truth rather than making a big scene and then dumping you?
If he truly cared for you, this would have been able to be resolved before pulling the dump card.
The fact of the matter is there is no trust left and a relationship requires trust. Based on the limited information provided, my gut would say he was looking at other options but didn't have a justified excuse to end the relationship without coming off as a dick as you didn't do anything wrong (he just had more interest in someone else)... Because you confronted him based on limited evidence, that was enough reason to make you out to be the bad guy.
You guys might be able to sort this out and get back together, but consider that if he indeed decides it is over regardless of how sorry you are, yet won't explain what those messages were about, then your gut was right. Even if it is wrong, it is still over, so what does it matter? If you do get back together, but nothing is explained, can you trust him?
Most Helpful Girl
if you've gone through his phone that means you don't trust him, now he knows you've gone through his phone he's not gonna trust you.
If you do get back together your relationship won't be the same. He'll be reluctant to leave his phone around you and you'll be too scared to say anything in case he dumps you.
If you're prepared for that then just talk to him. Tell him that you love him & that you value him. If he wants to get back together then speak about the issues you have with him the 'few other changes' you mentioned. Tell him you don't feel 100% secure or comfortable, ask him if he can give you an explanation for the texts & then start fresh. If he doesn't want to get back together then leave it. You can't force him and maybe it's for the best, maybe you're the one who dodged a bullet he could've actually been cheating after all.1