I was recently just broken up with a few weeks ago. I'd been dating this guy long-distance for 5 months and it was really amazing. Even though the distance, we made it work and I was flying to see him a ton (for a week or two at a time) or he'd come visit me. So basically we had to move fast because we'd be living with each other each time we visited but it was really great.
He'd told me he was in love with me, wanted to spend his life with me, and he was constantly in shock that he's even been able to get a girl like me. He would always remind me how pretty I was, how I looked like a model, how much I meant to him and made him happy, etc.
A few days before he was supposed to move back home (near me) we got into a minor fight but made up a day later (we've only maybe gotten into 2 very small arguments throughout our relationship.) He moved back home a few days after and I saw him that same night. We slept together, he told me he loved me, etc. and the next day he broke up with me? He said that he was going to be too busy with his job and wouldn't have time to focus on me. I was shocked. Well.. a couple days after he told me he just didn't "feel the same anymore." I was also shocked to hear that because it was so random and unexpected. He did all of this over text because he refused to meet me in person for some reason.
Eventually, he fessed up after three weeks and had told me his "heart had always been somewhere else." I found out he'd gotten back together with his ex right after he'd dumped me. I was so sad. I said some harsh words to him but we eventually ended on somewhat good terms (even though he'd hurt me badly.)
Does anyone even understand this? Do you think I was just a rebound to him? I find it really strange how the first day he moves back home he dumps me, even though he'd been telling me for 5 months the only reason he was coming back home was for me and his job. He told me to move on, he wishes me well, etc. Do you think he ever loved me?
Most Helpful Guy
So a few things to note here:
1. Its hard to tell if you were a rebound. He may have sincerely wanted to be with you, but since he probably had a greater investment in the ex-gf (e. g., he was dating her for years, and perhaps knew her family... etc), it would have been difficult for you to win that battle once she came back on the scene.
2. Your 2nd paragraph, "He told me he was in love with me... etc", smells of a used car dealer con man to me. The majority of men do NOT say these types of things because it sounds fake and cliché, belonging more in TV shows and movies than real life. The types of men who actually say these things are con men. Those who prey on a woman's insecurities by paying them endless compliments and verbal signs of love. Women eat this shit up, and certain men give these compliments because it's the fastest way to get laid.
3. Paragraph 3 and 4 tells me he is a coward, and unable to grow a set of man balls. He was not able to tell you honestly that he was going back to his ex. Trust me, he didn't break up because he just didn't "feel the same anymore". He broke up with you because his ex was taking him back, and he pussied out by making fake excuses for his breakup with you.
Long story short. Its hard to tell how strong your relationship was over a 5-month long distance thing. You probably thought the relationship was stronger than it actually was. Given this, you probably thought more highly of him than he deserves, since you only notice the major flaws in the long-term. I would tell you to move on, and reject him if he ever tries to come back or contact you. Nothing good will come of a relationship with someone who is willing to drop you like that.1
Most Helpful Girl
because he loved her0