Should I ask him if he wants his stuff back?

me and my ex boyfriend for a year broke up about a month ago and it was long distance and we went back and forth with living where he lives and than were I live during the summer. so I have some of his stuff, his favorite sunglasses a hoodie he gave me .

it's to hard seeing this stuff and I don't really think I could throw it out.

he stopped talking to me because he felt like it would be easier for me to get over him.

i don't know if he hates me but he told me he couldn't come see me one more time because it would make him love me even more so should I message him and ask him if he wants it back or just leave it ?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Do Not Message Him!

    He needs time to heal as do you.

    I was in a similar situation but I disliked the guy a lot after. After having some of his things at my placing not even out in sight but knowing it was in the back of my closet and under my bed I felt like I needed to take care of it. I still wasn't over him so I had a large bonfire had some friends over and burned it. While his things burned I said reasons why I was happy the relationship is over!

    It really helped me heal. It was awesome!

    I don;t know how old you are since you are under 18 you might want someone to supervise you. Fire is dangerous!

    • that's exactly what I did with one of my little kid relationships befor him.

      i burned his sweater and than we became friends so I felt like a real

      ahole for doing it. I think the only reason I haven't thrown it out is because

      he told me that if he doesn't move farther away than he will come see me

      and make things good again. so I'm holding on to his word that probably

      wont happen.

    • If you feel OK with having his things in a box in the closet, then keep it until he comes back or doesn't two years later. If not then donate it to good will then when he asks for it he can't be too mad. He can go buy it back or be happy that he basicly gave a sweater or hoodie whatever to a cold person! I would wait a while though be fore letting these things out of the house maybe another month..

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What Guys Said 2

  • Gee, if he had a mutual friend - you could get him/her to pick up the stuff so they can deal with it out of your house.

    I know someone who can't fully use her garage, as he won't come get all that junk. First excuse was he moved & no place to store it. No mutual friend, none of her friends wants to do the deed.

    At least mail his sunglasses back.

  • Well, depends:

    If you ended the relationship on good terms, yeah, you should definitely try and send the stuff back to him somehow.

    But if you had a falling out, you should probably sell his stuff on the black market.

    • we ended on good terms. we talked for about a week after our break up daily but than we both knew that it wasn't good for us.

      i sent him a message just saying I don't know if you want your stuff back I don't know what to do with it so if you want it ill send it if not that okay.

    • Sounds like you got it under control. =)

What Girls Said 3

  • Put it all in a box, then tell him if he want's it to come get it. Only tell him once. If he doesn't want it back, let him know you will be donating it. Give him a week or so to retrieve it, if he doesn't. You know what you have to do. If he tells you to send it to him, make sure he pay's for the cost.

  • If you know his address just send it down. I'm sure he would appreciate it, especially if some are his favourites. I remember I would stay at my exes and I left a lot of stuff there, and I never got it back even when I asked for it, so I think his sister may have taken it. But I definitely would have appreciated having my stuff given back, I would have liked to not even have to ask. I think he would think highly of you if you did, it shows that you care enough to not throw out his things, or keep them, its rare cause most people after a breakup just keep the stuff, but you should definitely give it back. It shows you have a good character.


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