My cheating ex-girlfriend wants me back, can I get some assistance?

[matt524]

Okay, I'll make this as understandable as possible, I'm 18 years old and she is 18 years old. I dated my ex for a good two years, we weren't the most perfect couple, we would fight often and breakup all the time, but at the same time we were in complete love and were eventually planning on marriage in the future. It was around the end of last year when I got a feeling that she was cheating (lack of physical affection, never wanted to hangout) and using my knowledge in computers and used a keylogger on my computer when she came over one day and retrieved her Facebook information to do some browsing. To no surprise, I found pictures and messages to some older guy around 22 or so years old. I was heartbroken... I felt sick to my stomach and didn't know what to do. I brought it to her attention and we parted ways. At first, I couldn't take the pain and I would always ask for another chance and practically beg her to take me back. She wouldn't budge and before I knew it, she started dating this guy. I was jealous. They could only see each other on weekends due to the distance, but even after that... we would hangout everyday. We would makeout, have sex, and pretty much still have some physicalness. She was cheating on this guy with me basically. So he found out we still talked and told her to stop, we stopped for a little and she cracked and told me how much she misses me, he found out and got my number and texting me telling me to back off, I told him everything we do while he's up in college and he was fuming and admitted to me that he just used her for sex. He broke things off with her and now after months of on-and-off talking, I've tried to keep away from contacting her, but from looking at her Tumblr/Twitter/Facebook, it's clearly evident she loves and misses me. We go to the same school and lately I've been giving her more chances to make things right, yet she refuses. Her tumblr/twitter continues to prove to me how much she misses me still as they have breakup/love song lyrics, memories of our past, and pretty much everything your average female would miss in an ex-boyfriend.

This is where you guys come in, I don't know what to do. I love her and miss her so much, but am I setting myself up for more hurt? My friends want me to move on once and for all, but I just can't and they aren't to happy with me. Is it worth it anymore? Do you guys believe in "Once a cheater, always a cheater?", and do we try to make it work?

I want her back, she wants me back. I treated her like gold and I just want things to work, but don't know if I should even put in anymore effort.

Updates

+1 y

I meant to put this under break-ups.

[selfishstars]

Honestly, even before the cheating, you said that the two of you fought often and would break up all the time. Either you're not right for each other, or one or both of you aren't mature enough to handle a relationship.

Then she cheated on you---but wanted to have her cake and eat it too (got with this guy, but still hung out with and have sex with you). She probably wants you back because things didn't work out the way she wanted them to.

My opinion: Not worth it.

[matt524]

Well said.

I just don't understand why she plays hard to get and puts no effort into making us work, when it's extremely obvious that she wants me back as a relationship.

Before the cheating, we would fight a lot and at first, we were very immature and didn't know how to handle the fights. Towards the end of the two-year relationship, we were starting to learn that talking things out was a positive way of going about our disagreements.

I appreciate the advice and I have just about given up.

[selfishstars]

Either she isn't really interested in getting back with you (maybe she doesn't really want to be with you, but is lonely/doesn't want to be alone/misses the comfort of your longterm relationship); or she's playing games (which is immature and you shouldn't put up with it. If she really wants you back, she should be the one proving that she's worth taking back, not the other way around).

[Craziie]

Hm. She's a cheater. She's cheating on her at the moment boyfriend now..what makes you think she won't cheat on you when you're together? & As you said she's done it before right?

[themastaplan]

shes a cheater...dont get back with her, you'll never have complete trust back

[themastaplan]

every time she's out with her "girlfriends" you'll wonder if she really is or if she's cheating again...dont put yourself through that

[Anonymous]

This girl isn't worth anything.