Legally still married but been separated for 10 years would you date them all call it quits?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend and I have been dating now for 9 years he has been separated from his ex ( still legally his wife) for over 10 years. They both appear to have moved on she has been dating someone for 6 years now and he has been dating me for 9. They share 2 sons both who are now of the age of 21. They have divided all the assets. Although I have no desire to ever get married I do want that security of knowing that my boyfriend there is a future and that I haven’t wasted 9 years of my life. No I do not see myself as the other woman as I said they are living in separate residence, they are both with new partners and all assets have been legally divided they just have not divorced.

So why is it neither of them won’t actually file for a divorce? Should I walk away even if I do love him if they won’t get divorced?

[WonderBell99]

It has been over 10 years and they are still not legally divorced? I’m sure people have their reasons, but this raises a few red flags. This is something that you need to discuss at length with your boyfriend. You need to talk to him and figure out WHY he is not ready to get a divorce yet.

Although, I’m a tad confused. You have been dating him for 9 years, why did this conversation not come up before? When you first met, did you know that he was not up for a divorce? You should have asked him when he was going to divorce her 9 years ago, when you went on dates with him.

Do you want to get married to him? Is he opposed to the idea of marriage considering his previous marriage ended? I do not think you should walk away just yet.. at least, until you know WHY neither of them are filing for a divorce, especially after spending 9 years with him. Either way, you need to lay out your concerns. If the reasons he give are not feasible for you, or if he refuses to divorce her, walk out.

[In_Trance]

Seems like a conversation you need to have with your boyfriend

[LazerBean]

No, I would never give a married man a chance