Have you ever felt that you weren’t meant to be in your boyfriend’s future? That maybe you’re just an obstacle? Should I leave the father of my child?

Anonymous

This is a topic I have dwelled on for so long. I have been vocal, for 7 years now. It’s hard to explain to people close to me (26F) of my problems because my partner (27M) isn’t the “bad guy”. A likeable, mellow, and quiet person. We met young and have grown into adults together. Two years into the relationship, I got pregnant. And now we’ve lived our life with just our one child. I have been feeling my self esteem and self worth took a big hit for just being his BM. I expected that we’d be married by now. We have our own jobs, but my partner said he wanted to wait til he has a proper career. I’m at a point where I feel that all the responsibilities I have I can achieve on my own. But I’m scared that if I leave I’m going to be the one at fault for ruining our family. I can’t accept his intimacy anymore or appreciate when he tries to be nice to me. I feel cold, and over it. I’ve started to resent his advances towards me and respond with sarcasm that I’ve seen hurt his feelings. “Ex. I think you should save that for your wife. Let her know I’m good with carpools” I don’t know, I guess I expected him to have fallen for someone by now, if he wouldn’t settle with me. I’ve cried to him, and it’s like I’m talking to a brick wall. It’s like he’s waiting for my crying to end and nothing is ever resolved. Why can’t he give me a solid answer that I’m not the one for him? Why does someone who isn’t the cliche “bad dad” hurt me so much? He was the person I wanted to grow old with. I don’t think I’ll ever feel closure from this. or the decision that will soon come. Especially after the holidays. If you read this all, sorry for the pathetic vent.

Have you ever felt that you weren’t meant to be in your boyfriend’s future? That maybe you’re just an obstacle? Should I leave the father of my child?
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