When she - or he - left your to go back to another, how much did it hurt?

Question

Seems to me whenever someone leaves you for another, it's going to hurt. Yet with others it's good riddance. What was your experience?

WhiteSteve · Accepted Answer

The closest I’ve had was just this girl I was seeing for a few months in my mid-20s. Wasn’t even super-serious, we weren’t an official couple, but I think we were both only seeing each other at the time. I did feel like it was maybe heading in the right direction to consider a real relationship though.

We only had maybe like a month to six weeks together before school ended and she went home for the summer. But she had just transferred that semester from Arizona State, and I guess there was a boyfriend back there that she had split with upon leaving. She and I maybe saw each other 4-5 days a week, and she’d usually spend the night at my place, and of course that’s all in that initial hot-and-heavy period, so good times were being had by all, haha, I think you get attached to that as much as anything.

Anyway, she went home in May, and I only got to see her one time, and I spent a TON of money on Red Sox tickets in the then-new seats they built atop “The Green Monster” (our stadium’s legendary tall left-field wall), and it vs the Yankees, our archrivals, so it was just about the hottest ticket in town, and she was a HUGE fan. Didn’t really overthink it, plus I was making good money at the time hustling weed, but it definitely felt like an “ok, you’re a little more to me than just some chick in sleeping with” move, and I felt like that feeling was being reciprocated. Was a really cool date, very nice memory for me.

August rolls around and we’re getting close to the school year starting, and I hadn’t seen her since the game, only talked to her on the phone. She took a trip to Arizona just before it, and I called her one time, and a dude picked up, and said very sternly “No, she’s asleep”, when I asked if she was around. I definitely read that how you’d think, but I brushed it off because I had actually hooked up with this girl I used to hook up with a few years prior. So I was just like “welp…. what should I expect?”

She came back a couple weeks later, and I just planned to carry on as normal since she had called me back and seem normal. But the day she came back she called me, and broke the news to me that she had gotten back with her old boyfriend, presumably the guy who answered the phone. Wasn’t totally shocked, but was a little surprised, and definitely bummed. Didn’t rip my heart out or anything, but she was really cool, really fun, very hot, and knew what she was doing behind closed doors, so there wasn’t much not to like. Plus other dudes would always be giving me credit for pulling her, I didn’t hate that respect😂

Honestly, the worst feelings I had about it were just feelings of placing second, being the silver medalist. I’m kinda vain, and was at peak cockiness at that time, lmao, so even sight unseen, I was like “HIM over ME?”😧 He might’ve been a straight up man-dime, I don’t know, I just didn’t like losing to him😂 But the reality is she was already in love with the guy and I’d assume the distance was the reason for the breakup, and they had just resolved to make it work. I hope she at least ended up with him though😝

So, fun while it lasted, and she’s ultimately a pleasant memory for me, although that’s easy to say since we were never fully committed.

NathanDavis · Accepted Answer

She said to me, over the phone She wanted to see other people I thought, "well, then Look around, they're everywhere" Said that she was confused I thought, "darlin', join the club" 24 years old, mid-life crisis Nowadays hits you when you're young I hung up, she called back, I hung up again The process had already started Least it happened quick I swear I died inside that night A friend, he'd called, I didn't mention a thing The last thing he said was "be sound", sound I contemplated an awful thing, I hate to admit I just thought those would be such appropriate last words But, I'm still here, and small So small, how could this trouble seam so big So big Well the palms in the breeze still blow green And the waves in the sea still absolute blue But the horror Every single thing I see is a reminder of her Never thought I'd curse the day I met her And since she's gone, and wouldn't hear Who would care? What good would that do? But I'm still here So I imagine in a month or 12 I'll be somewhere having a drink Laughing at a stupid joke Or just another stupid thing And I can see myself stopping short Drifting out of the present Sucked by the under tow and pulled out deep And there I am standing Wet grass and white head stones, all in rows And in the distance there's one off on it's own So I stop, kneel My new home And I picture a sober awakening A re-entry into this little bar scene Sip my drink till the ice hits my lip Order another round And that's it for now Sorry, never been too good at happy endings

Guy13 · Answer

It aches for a long-time and never really leaves the back of your mind as one is always aware of the possibilities of this event reoccurring in their future boyfriend and girlfriend dynamic.

exitseven · Answer

I saw The Lettermen perform this song. They were really good.

She left me to go back to her old boyfriend from high school. I really was in love with her and it was like she ripped my beating heart out of my chest and stomped on it.

SnowedIn · Answer

Crushing, searing heartache. For months. This was a song she had given me and it became sort of an anthem that got me through it.

Massageman · Answer

I was over it in a week or two. Maybe I picked up someone else's "Good Vibrations".

AydenHazor · Answer

It always hurts, but eventually you realize, with some, that, at the least, it was for the best, and sometimes it really was good riddance. You don't usually realize that immediately though.

LiamJHayden · Answer

I have never really cared. If she wants to be somewhere else or with someone else then I really do not want her around.

Likes2drive · Answer

Well, I never had that happen, but I’ve been cheated on, and then they married them after getting divorced

msc545 · Answer

Hurt like hell until I learned to no longer care and no longer trust women.

Sparkie460 · Answer

I've never had that happen to me

When she - or he - left your to go back to another, how much did it hurt?

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