When was the moment you realized you deserve better in a romantic relationship?

[melanieeeB]

I just saw this on Instagram. What was a repost of a reddit question, but the comments underneath were so interesting and sad at the same time. Since I love hearing other people's stories, what about you?

I might add some pics.
(The last cause I really liked her comment)

Personally, I thankfully never had a super bad relationship.
Still with my first ex, what was an on and off and not super serious, we were young etc..
I realized and left for good after his one friend had tried really badly to get my number from him. He says he had said no multiple times but eventually gave in and we all know what his friends intention was... anyways, that was our last fight.

[DizzyDesii]

The first guy turned out to be a habitual liar and cheater. He got more chances than he deserved. Others from 2018 and before had a bad habit of saying they’d change when something went wrong, but they’d always revert back once I stayed. Some of everyone else 2019+ who got caught in major lies would just make me end things right then and there because at that point, I stopped believing people could change. If you wanted to change your behavior, you’d change before you met me. I didn't want to take the chance of being manipulated again and again. So yea 2019 was the year i knew i deserved better

[DizzyDesii]

Thanks for mho

[Razp_Sorbet]

I've seen a few of these. The issue is the men think she ended the relationship because of one of these miniscule reason (not talking about the SA ones). Then the narrative continues that women get angry over the smallest things when in reality it is a whole pile of small things which turns into a large thing (which is the man doesn't care) then one that just makes us crack and end it all.

[melanieeeB]

Agreed! Those stories are usually just the last interaction that made someone leave but there are way moreeee that lead up until this moment.

[turnpost]

More like a bunch a problems that the guys just can't reasonably fix.
Or the girl just can't help but imagine herself being right all the time, can't she can't be to blame for any problems as well.

[Razp_Sorbet]

@turnpost yeah being a decent person is definitely far out of your reach.

[turnpost]

Yeah i have now read the story its garbage. I was just given benefit of the doubt.
I take back my comment.

[mattc007007]

I was going to university in the city, and was really sad. I sat on a bench and was smoking a cig when this hot milf and her friend asked me if everything was ok. I explained to them what had occurred in my past relationship, and the woman said I could pull a 9/10 who treats me like an equal.

They bought me popeyes and talked to me for at least a half hour, and I started to realize it was true. I then began talking to other women and realized she was right! We all deserve the best and should never settle.

[melanieeeB]

I love this! I hope you found a right person for you

[mattc007007]

I have! I'm single right now, but I've had very fulfilling relationships with amazing people since then.

[melanieeeB]

That sounds very amazing!

[Anonymous]

That last one is telling.

Absolutely no one is telling women to lower their standards for this shit.

They are however correctly pointing out that women often choose "bad boy" types and think they can change them. Young women especially, often go for the gigachad who has a good car, without ever realising that if he's attractive to her, he will be attractive to other girls too, meaning she will be in constant competition with his other options. And Chad's aren't big on monogamy.

[exitseven]

I flew out 1500 miles to see her. She showed up at the airport wearing a hoodie covered in plaster dust. Her hair was in some weird perm and it was combed over in some weird perm. She told me that she almost forgot to pick me up at the airport. At that moment I all of a sudden fell out of love with her.

[Becky316]

Before I got married to my hubby, a former boyfriend (I was a virgin) took me to a frat party and tried to get me to participate in a group fuck. While I had given bj's, I had never fucked one.

This was only 1 of several reasons but it's when I realized that I needed to dump this asshole

[Littlejugs99]

I watched my sister's and the douchebags they dated. A defining moment was being hit on when I was 14 by my sister's creepy fiancee. My sister had passed out and he walked in on me get changed for bed by "accident".

[Msputiton]

When i spent 300 dollars on a present that they didn't even appreciate

[Sarah2023]

I realised I deserved better when he stopped caring about my feelings and needs. When he stopped being intimate and showing love. When he complained every day and didn’t bother to ask how I was doing.

[Fuentes]

Probably when my BM moved and took my kid and didn't tell me shit for the longest. I realized I gotta be solo & only care about money regardless I'm glad she did that when I was young cause I woulda never chased after a better a life.

[Msputiton]

That is so wrong. Did she keep her from you?

[Fuentes]

@Msputiton for awhile but things are different now still its gets tricky but it's whatever. I had to chase bags to make changes so I hate when people say money don't matter, cause money means everything.

[Msputiton]

Wow. She was wrong for that.

You don't keep a child from a parent unless the parent is a threat to their lives.

[Fuentes]

@Msputiton u telling me lol backwards stuff, it happens tho and it don't make sense. Some people gonna be the way they're and do what they do. As for me, chasing bags prevents issues like this hahahaaha

[Msputiton]

Yup.
I got a cousin. His BM keeps the child from him unless she needs him to buy her child something then she wants him to see her, to beg for money.
I wanna beat her butt so bad

[Fuentes]

@Msputiton yeah uses the child as a pawn it happens and it's weird sf cause why? Hahaha how are u moved on with ur life and care so much about tryna attack the dude u made a kid with. Some women forever be in their feelings hahaa

[Msputiton]

Exactly it is sad. She almost 30 actin like a 17 yr old, who uses her child as a weapon, and a tool.

[Fuentes]

@Msputiton same lol I don't know what goes on in the mind of some people and I never will I don't try to convince my kid to hate her mom but she's getting older and she starting to cause she out two and two together. But I tell her all the time that's your mom u gotta respect her she takes care of you.

[Msputiton]

Yup that's the best way let them figure it out on their own.
They always do. They see how you are and how she is and eventually go. Thank you for stepping in where momma failed

[PointTaken]

Wow. Those men need to be put in their place. For me, it was when she would rather be out with friends than spend time with me. Yet on the other hand, I work a lot which we agreed on before I did.

[Tyrael]

A lot of women's standards are unrealistically high as per the last comment.

What guys mean by that:

"Must be 6ft, most earn 6 figures, must be 6 inches."

These are unrealistic standards and account for far less than 5% of the population, you're not getting that guy.

What women hear: SA and abuse are acceptable standards 🙄

[melanieeeB]

Start living in the real life.

[Nikki1989]

My thoughts exactly, Melanie.

[turnpost]

For me was when she would say the n word casually and admitted to being a heightist.

[Marked_Man]

I see this is a feminist man stomp. Too bad they don't consider the sh1t men have to put up with. Not excusing the things in the posts above, but women rarely self reflect.

[serious]

Romantic relationship?

Never been in one.

[Anonymous]

The last one. I think when we're young we accept the best of whatever some is willing to give us. But as you get older you understand better what you're worth. And you're simply just not willing to entertain a woman unwilling to give you less.

[LiamJHayden]

Wow, I've never experienced - nor would I allow - anything like these. Each time it has been a moment where I realized, "She's nice/sweet, but this is going nowhere."

[KrakenAttackin]

For every one of the above posted stories there is a very different other side.

[HappyWoman34]

When I got stalked.

[eagle1951]

when i caught her in bed with another guy