Too many to list here, but those that immediately come to mind:
1. If a woman and I don't work out, it doesn't mean something is wrong with one or both of us. It just means we aren't a good match. It's not a reason to get depressed and it's not a reason to get mad at her. It is just a reason to move forward.
2. EVERYONE has flaws. EVERYONE. The prettiest girl walking down the street has some issues that will drive you nuts, and there's a few guys somewhere who got tired of fucking her.
3. When you have trouble in a relationship, keep that shit to yourself. Don't tell your friends or family. Once you tell them, they'll hate her; then, when I reconcile with the bitch, they'll still hate her and my life will be MUCH more difficult.
4. Girls are on their best behavior when they are being courted. That's as good as they will ever be; it won't get better after you start living together or after you get married.
5. Most people love who they are and they're not going to change for me or anybody else. Yes, people are CAPABLE of changing, but they don't want to change.
6. Texting is okay for "can you pick up a gallon of milk on the way home?" It is an awful way to try to talk about anything that is important and that has any emotional component to it. If you are so lazy that you want to text instead of talking, the relationship isn't going to last.
7. ANYBODY can be happy taking their girlfriend to DisneyWorld, but you're not going to do that very often. It's more important that you have fun when you go to the grocery store together, or when you're doing household chores, because you'll spend much more of your life doing those things.
8. If you send her flowers, send them to her AT WORK. She wants all the other ladies to see those flowers when they arrive, and she's wants to say "Oh, girls, look what my man sent me!" And the ladies will respond with, "Ok, Amber, you must have been a very good girl. . . or a very bad girl!" And Amber will get this slightly embarrassed look on her face but be secretly thrilled.
9. She will always tell the waiter "no" when he asks about dessert, but she really DOES want dessert. She's just afraid that I'm gpnna think she's a cow if she orders dessert. So I say, "I'd kinda like a dessert, but not a whole one. Amber, would you share a dessert with me?" Now, it has become amatter of her helping me with this situation, and she'll say "sure!" So I ask her to look at the dessert menu, she orders whatever contains the most chocolate, we'll get two forks or spoons and sit closer to eat dessert, and everybody is a winner!
10. Sex is great and it's gotta be there but if that's all you got, you are far from having a solid relationship.
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What NOT to tolerate from women. I look at all of them to be learning experiences. Yes, love, trust, honesty, and loyalty are all important in a relationship. But so is knowing your boundaries and being able to communicate them to your partner.
We all like to think that love is unconditional and endless and that that's what makes it worth fighting for, worth keeping. But the REALITY is it's ALWAYS conditional. Conditional on the fact that that person put forth effort as well.
I'm not with those women anymore because they stopped putting forth that effort, even after I communicated what I needed. What my boundaries were. So they were put back on the street. Or they felt I did not hold up my end. Hopefully if they were right I learned from this and corrected this so I didn't being this into the next relationship.
We as human are lifetime learnners, not just when we're young. You can always improve. Never assume you got life locked. That'll just turn you cynical. And nobody likes a cynical person.
The biggest things he taught me is How to love UNCONDITIONALLY and how to LET GO.
And there are some other lessons:
I should stay myself and a right person will love me, I shouldn’t change for anyone.
That, even if we are as close as two people can get, I should still make him think that he needs to earn me…
I shouldn’t accept being treated the way I don’t deserve to be treated.
He taught me things men do for love and not to accept anything less.
He taught me that looks after all mean nothing.
He taught me so many things I can keep on for ages.
He taught me life.
The main thing I learned is to truly understand they're a separate person with their own goals, fears, histories, etc. I had trouble understanding why exes didn't always do what I wanted. My empathy and understanding has grown wildly since those days.
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Teo main things...
1. Life goes on
2. We learn from our mistakesDon't trust too much...
Pretty much that I have zero value to women for just existing. That doesn’t mean I should remain forever “special” to anyone if they lost interest.
But a break up is just a cruel reminder that men aren’t respected just for existing. Women only show concern for men if there is something in it for them (they find us attractive, they have feelings, we have money, we help their social status, they need us for some other reason, etc.).
Once a woman no longer finds you valuable you are expendable. Period. It doesn’t matter if you did or didn’t do anything wrong. Doesn’t matter what she said to earlier when she did have feelings. Women say “I love you” as an expression of their feelings. Men are more careful about saying “I love you” because it’s not just an expression of feelings for us. We say that as a pledge of loyalty.
Ugly truth is that women don’t respect men out of sake of principle. No they only show “respect” if there is something in it for them. It’s an evolutionary behavior they have a hard time coming to grips with.
Too never give to much , without receiving in return , , never be with someone that doesn’t prioritize you like you prioritize them , Never trust space in a relationship, if someone truly loves you, they won’t need extra space from you period , never fall for that shit Find someone that removes selfishness for you the same way you do for them , We all have selfishness in us , if you can’t remove that for your partner they won’t be able to remove it for you , it needs to go both ways or it won’t work period
Never date the same woman more than three times. Because the woman never learns her mistakes in the relationship and she chooses to blame her boyfriend for them instead of taking ownership for them. Then when she wants you back and you moved she complains about it saying that I should have taken responsibilities for her but she's the one who broke up with me. My ex said that she needed time for herself then 3 hours later she's taking pictures with her new boyfriend. My other ex breaks up with me because I refuse to take her out to get her hands and feet done after purchasing a television for $600 for her birthday. My ex blames me for going hysterical on her after she breaks up with me because I'm immature but yet she's the one constantly complaining whenever she can't get her way whether it's the TV remote or the car.
You dont learn anything from exs or presents for that matter , its just lifes evolution , there is no success / failure that's all complete bs , life is not black/white and life takes us down many differing paths , no one will must marry and live " happily ever after " like 60s - 70s TV , its a fantasy , take the " Brady Bunch " for example , the father was gay , the mother had an affair with the eldest son , one of the sisters is trailer trash..
You dont learn anything , you just grow up an evolve , going though the changing life process , its just a stepping stone.
Due to circumstances we couldnt be. But we didn't want to separate because the heart wants what it wants. The dichotomy was hurting us both and precluding her future. So i let go.
By letting her go, she taught me how to love. The pain of her loss remains painfully unbearable. Its worse than being dead. At least if im dead i dont know im dead. But now, I still feel her heart beating inside mine. Her very memory evokes a cold emptiness in my core and I instinctively clench my chest.
Im still alive.
So in telling her those three words, I love you, she knew I meant it.
Here are the things I've learned from my relationships.
1. There's nothing more destructive than not communicating. When someone stops communicating, there is NEVER anything good going on.
2. Anything short of an enthusiastic yes should be treated as a hard no.
3. The friends surrounding a relationship are more important than the person you're in a relationship with.
4. It is 1,000% worth it to put in the effort to acknowledge the person. Just take the 3 seconds required to acknowledge the person.
always choose yourself bc it's not worth it , after the breakup , i only cried bc i lost myself and did anything to make the rltp work and sacrificed my time and energy , i didn't cry over him bc he wasn't worth it , the only thing i honestly regretted was about me and not him and i ended up hating myself but im really thankful bc now i would put myself first all the time 👽💅
Not to take the shit I used to take, but to stand up for myself and not allow myself to be manipulated and verbally and emotionally abused as I was in the past. I've learned more about my self worth from healing from past relationships than from being in them
I learned not to simp, that women can be as equally shitty as men.
That women when the relationship ends due to their cheating or abusive behaviour will play the victim. A go to move for women is to claim domestic abuse and make false rape claims. That women do not like to be dumpedeven if they are the ones cheating and planning to leave you for another man.
If I'm dating a girl now and she tells me a dob story about how bad her ex was to her I dont automatically believe her.
1. Just because they seem sweet and the most loving doesn't mean they will never leave you.
2. Consider that something you say or do could hurt them too and trigger some kind of traumatic memory, even if you didn't mean to hurt them whatsoever.
3. Their silence tells you much more about them than you really realized.
4. A relationship can still be surprisingly very meaningful even without a lot of sex.That women cannot be trusted, and they can go from friend to worst enemy in five seconds flat. I learned that women are the best dream killers ever, even better than heroin. Women will suck all of your resources and mental energy than blame you for "not being the man she fell for anymore". In divorce she will absolutely destroy the family just as casually as she flushes a toilet. Women do not care about the effect on children AT ALL and of course they don't care about the man.
Most women don't give a fuck about any men, to include their fathers, brothers, husbands, and sons. Women act like they care but they don't. Just look at how women set their son's up for failure with women.
Most women have had too many casual sexual partners to bond with a man, so they are badly damaged before you even meet them.
Aside from occasional sex women add zero value to a man's life.
1. It’s very important to have good communication.
2. To make sure you guys are on same page from early on in relationship so he don’t waste your time.3. Very important to meet family as soon as possible or else it can also lead to waste of time.
4. Dating for many years don’t mean it is serious relationship.
5. You can’t force someone to change as they won’t change ever.
That women actually do like romance. In my early relationships, I definitely lacked it, thinking girls really didn't expect it anymore. I was wrong but luckily I did change that for the better as I grew as a person.
1. Don't spoil her, she will get used to it and will leave as soon as you decide to dial back to save your money.
2. Don't tell her your problems, she will lose respect for you.
3. Expect everything to go wrong within an instant; don't get too attached. The only one you can trust at the end of the day is yourself.
Being inlove with someone doesn't necessarily mean that you two are compatible and being compatible with someone doesn't necessarily mean that you are/will be inlove.
no long courtship, yes to marriage immediately if offered... i simply don't like wastinh time anymore
Don't ever get with someone who's not as into you as you are into them and don't tolerate a person who is too sensitive and can't agree to disagree.
Learn the symptoms of personality disorders and if a woman has one think twice before getting into a relationship with her.
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