What do you think could be done to help lower the rate of divorce in America?

Question

sadstrawberry · Accepted Answer

Loyality is rare. I'm rare because I'm hardcore loyal. But around me I saw many guys triple dating like my 2 ex, my own male cousins and more. It's bad especially in era where dating apps are prevalent. People forgot what it's like to have feelings and love someone and is busy looking directly for intimacy. We are the ones that create intimacy. It's hard to trust anyone now because people say something else, think something else and do something else. It's scary. So if you're guy I think girls cheat less and guys cheat a lot. I think you should be a giver and the girl in return if she loves you back will give you too. Making money when you're young and after 25 find love. Because, I feel people are not very mature and experiment and shit when they're young so find someone who is mindful, knows themselves and loves themselves enough and who has set certain standards for herself, so that she can love you consistently and most importantly love someone only if you love yourself and is content with yourself. Because happiness and love is interrelated. You can't find love or happiness in someone else if you can't find it in yourself first. Okay?

Dinklex3 · Accepted Answer

Hmm.. I don’t really see divorce as something entirely negative. A lot of people that divorced, definitely needed it.

I think if people weren’t in such a rush to get married in the first place wanting to marry the first serious relationship due to others opinions and criticisms, it’d be good. A lot of people I know got married so young because it’s what they thought they were supposed to do. They’ve been decreasing and might continue to do so. It’s a minority, but a lot of dumbass kids have stopped marrying for benefits. I’ve only had to lecture like 3/4.

HawkPerception · Accepted Answer

There should be a mandatory law that divorce does not entitle you to half of someone's assets that they've earned throughout their lives. Marriage for many women is seen as an investment. Just because you marry a wealthy guy doesn't mean you deserve to be living that way if you divorce him. If you choose to divorce with kids, then the man should help provide for his kids and provide them with what they need, so costs should given to cover those costs. Any more than that is something the woman does not deserve.

I believe that if we get rid of social media and dating apps as well, where women get a shit ton of attention and inflated egos, that will reduce the likelihood of them cheating on their husbands. I'm not saying that only women cheat, but getting rid of social media and dating apps would definitely decrease the amount of cheating... both ends.

I also believe that if people learn to communicate their issues rather than keep it bottled in, relationships would work much better.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Legalize real marriage again.

Most Americans today are sold the idea that Marriage is some kind of union for the pleasure of the adult parties rather than the security of the children it was created to be.

This is why no-fault divorce and even gay "marriage" has been implemented in the first place. But in reality none of the people who believe this were ever really married in the first place. They were just seeking the honor and trappings of the union for a mere friendship.

It is for this reason their "union" was never anything but the mere friendship it was treated as and offered none of the key and defining security of the institution. Leaving the children of said unions ever more abandoned if they even had the chance to grow up at all.

jennifer_bloom · Answer

Finding joy and satisfaction in good things and not bad things. Eating tuna and not candy. Hiking or reading and not drinking or gambling. A simple home with lots of space and not a fancy home with uncomfortable chairs. Oatmeal for breakfast and not sweetened Cocoa Puffs.

AviatorTom · Answer

Since the US is slowly (well, maybe not so slowly?) turning into a socialist state, how about the government pays each married couple $1000 for every year they've been married. So, a couple married 10 years gets $10K, free and clear, no taxes. If they stay married another year, they get $11K, and so on. That would certainly encourage people to get, and stay, married.

hahahmm · Answer

That's easy to do by removing all incentives for divorce and making it impossible to divorce unless both spouses agree to it. But you also need to change the culture to where people are much more careful about who they marry in the first place. Our ancestors had this stuff figured out. People weren't dating 5, 10, 20, 100 people before they got married. People were actually working on making themselves good wife & good husband material long before they even got married. The whole society was geared up to value characteristics that made people trustworthy.

At this point in time tho, changing things in the entire culture would be like trying to move a mountain down a highway. Too many people are dead set on doing things that are destructive, counter productive & silly. Then they blame their own mistakes on others.

MrOracle · Answer

Both marriage and divorce need to be more difficult to accomplish - divorce significantly more so. No Fault Divorce needs to be eliminated. And there should be a 5 year ineligibility period after a divorce before you can begin the marriage process. 6 months of pre-marriage counseling should be required before you are eligible to marry.

All of this is needed so that people take marriage seriously again, because the current rules have encouraged most people to see marriage as a temporary situation that can easily be disposed of.

ZackBan · Answer

Amending divorce law to make getting a divorce without cause illegal.
It's that way in many countries and they have healthy nuclear families.

When you know marriage is a commitment and not just a piece of paper you'll know not to walk into a bad one too easily.
Plus it would fix the current incentives to get a divorce considering in many cases a divorce is more advantageous for certain spouses (mainly wives) than staying married.

Ultimately, marriage law in it's current state has failed. And broken homes have created a broken society.
So a change is in order.

camerum · Answer

I don't agree with the whole 'make it harder to divorce' argument... It's the same logic as 'if I don't test, then I'm not sick'

The disfunction is still there whether it is formalised or not.

I'd advocate for a) couples therapy being funded to help people work through the problems as they become apparent - not when they have destroyed a relationship, and b) to encourage people to wait for marriage until they are better prepared, and to wanting to commit for religious or 'but I love them' reasons.

Most seasoned married couples know that love is not enough, a marriage is work, but not in the negative sense - it's something that you can put love and care into, something to invest your energy in, because investment like that (when done by both parties) give back more than they take.

Tl;dr; learn to invest in your marriage, and seek help when your own abilities aren't enough

DextroShade · Answer

Easy: Eliminate no-fault divorce  Make any form of welfare or entitlment only payable to married couples, with an exception for widows Default 50/50 custody with no child support  If the wife cheats or refuses to put out, she gets no alimony, assets, or child custody, NOTHING Mandatory paternity testing for every birth Any accusations of abuse made in divorce court must have a police or medical report to back them up otherwise it's perjury.

KostasKouvalis · Answer

We need to change our dating culture. American dating culture is so strange. You're basically expected to get into a relationship within 2 weeks of meeting someone, rather than having a relationship develop out of a friendship, where you already know everything about each other. I've known so many Americans who married too quickly out of desperation or peer pressure, and they were so cocky about it, then ended up getting divorced within a couple years, as I knew they would. I don't know how you can marry someone you barely know. But Americans aren't that stupid in terms of street smarts. They know this, and will put on an act to seduce their partner. But once they've secured them, they let their guard down and their true colors start to show, and there come the divorce papers.

Apple1996 · Answer

The high divorce rates are mostly because of the boomer generation. The younger generations are already making the divorce rate go down

DishLady · Answer

1. Stop making foolish choices in who you marry — be more discerning.

2. Require the preliminary sit down with the minister/counselor/etc. for those preparing to be married.

3. Have a lesson — just like all the newfangled sex ed and blah blah classes they have now, but one about the purpose and meaning of marriage so folks know not to jump on lightly.

Serkee · Answer

Do away with no fault divorce. Marriage used to mean that you're bound together for life, for better or for worse, sicker or poorer, in sickness and in health. It's right there in the vows. It was permanent. It didn't mean you were bound together until you got bored, or until you got mad at each other. With no fault divorce, the significance of marriage goes right out the window.

PointlessNonsenseGuy · Answer

In America, most divorces, like 80% I think, are initiated by women, so your question is mostly about how to get women to change their behavior.

Outlawing alimony, so women were no longer getting paid to leave their husbands, would probably lower America's divorce rate quite a bit.

Rafrenc · Answer

The Govt needs to change the law or rights of woman and men making it harder for them to divorce and instead work things out it’s became popular to divorce and live a life with someone else’s family govt is approving and supporting divorces if they would consequence s they would rather work it out

Anonymous · Answer

nothing. people are free to let go if they want to

as for the reasons for divorce. make them take a finance class. teach them about money and saving. (i know it should be common sense, but it's one of the main reasons for divorce). teach them to split everything 50/50. all effort should be equal, no matter what.

don't make them combine their whole lives just because they're married. stop making them feel bad in society if they're not perfectly happy in their marriage.

Raaj4you · Answer

I still believe in the old tradition where only men were allowed to study, work. Women used to stay at home to cook, clean and raise kids. Woman should be dependent on his husband. This is the best option to reduce divorce rates and regain the lost value of the family. I am sure we will witness more happier and prosperous families.

TycheKairos · Answer

I don't know why divorces happen in America. No one has to spend their entire life married to one person. There are people who are suitable for marriage, and there are people who are not suitable. Not everyone should get married.

Static_In_The_Attic · Answer

It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure this one out & if you want to lower the divorce rate all you have to do is lower the marriage rate. Problem Solved.

HelpfulWoman · Answer

not allowing teenagers to marry straight away.  Therapy and having to live together first. Access to birth control.

DarkLegacy · Answer

Not get married in the first place. Getting married these days is a mugs game if you are a guy. This is with women initiating 75% of divorces and coming off financially better from it. A lot of women see marriage as a investment

northerngal · Answer

Well I just read that divorce rates in Canada are down... its believed that cost may be the primary reason. So maybe money talks?

IslaTheWitch · Answer

communication skills should be taught at school, together with assertiveness, negotiating and compromising...

normalice · Answer

Raise wages, lower the definition of full time to 32 hours per week, and break up regional monopolies to reduce prices.

OtterMan68 · Answer

A 60 day waiting period between the application for a marriage license and the issuing of a licence.

Don't want to mandate this, but every couple should undergo at least one session of couple's counseling prior to marriage.

Zbrody1997 · Answer

Put an end to modern feminism, onlyfans girls, hookup culture. And teach base morals we should have as humans.

OfMiceandMen · Answer

Hmmm... how about divorce branding iron. You're right, too subtle.

Boomchakalaca · Answer

Mostly the wives call for the divorce so become gay

Unit1 · Answer

The abolishment of marriage. Watch 0 divorces happening. But of course, it's a whole industry operating in a vacuum and generating a high revenue. High enough to drive a Ferrari probably.

midnightmoon05 · Answer

The one initiates pays. Sure would rethink their decisions and cheating.

sage2021 · Answer

Not have so many people get married in the first place.

purplepoppy · Answer

Encourage people to think more before they grab the first person they can sink their claws into.

andreasderjuengere · Answer

For ''Americans" - get divorced somewhere else?

SotiCoto · Answer

Lower the marriage rate. Fewer marriages = fewer divorces.

Booklover_90 · Answer

If people actually took marriage seriously. It’s not just “a thing you do.”

KrakenAttackin · Answer

We could lower the marriage rate even further. The number one cause of divorce is marriage.

VV3ZZY123 · Answer

People need to be educated about it, but that is up to the people getting married.

DreamLife7 · Answer

Ladies stop being airheads. Be accountable for your poor decisions

handsomelad70 · Answer

More later marriages, i. e, men at or after 40;women 30-40.

ManInChains · Answer

Prenuptial agreements

Donald_Tate · Answer

Make divorce illegal.

TommyMountainFigure · Answer

Move to Canada before getting divorced!

dustybiker2 · Answer

Make it a federal law outlawing marriage.

lightbulb27 · Answer

good question!

Agape93 · Answer

Ban marriage except as a religious ceremony.

exitseven · Answer

If less people got married.

DrPepper12 · Answer

Definitely moving into getgorrbribf

Aiko_E_Lara · Answer

Equal consequences after the divorce

jahaims · Answer

Change societal and cultural norms.

gorydetails · Answer

Make them harder to get.

captain_voidwalker · Answer

Get rid of no fault divorce

LiamJHayden · Answer

A return to at-fault divorce.

Anonymous · Answer

Don't marry an American.

thisAppIsGarbage · Answer

Make American men marry Eastern women.

Abodyp · Answer

Not get married

In_Trance · Answer

Abolish marriage

mickeysmonkey · Answer

Open relationships

What do you think could be done to help lower the rate of divorce in America?

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