Colleagues still hanging out with my abusive ex?

[Anonymous]

So I was together with my ex for a year, he was really mentally, emotionally and verbally abusive. We met when I started working at his workplace, we worked together for 6 months and when I started he had already been working there for 6 months. He quit his job and got another job but always remained close with our colleagues. I got really close to my colleagues and cared about them a lot. Last February he cheated on me, with a girl from my work (or at least he tried to). I found out during my shift. I quit and talked to all my colleagues and explained to them how badly he had treated me, the abuse, cheating esc, and they were really compassionate. They saw how hard all of this was for me and how much it affected me. But I recently saw on my colleagues Instagram story that some of them went camping together and he was invited. Is it unfair of me to be hurt by it, and perhaps a little betrayed?

[Anonymous]

Hard to say. I’m sure a lot of us hang out w people who are like that. But too what exactly do you mean by mentally abusive? Verbally abusive? I’ve come to learn that a lot of women will say things like this when a lot of times, not all, a man is just being straight up honest w a girl. Then she gets her feelings hurt. Now she considers him verbally abusive. Who knows. Maybe your friends thought you were the problem. It’s hard to make a judgement call on this w out actually being in that situation. An ex of mine used to say I was verbally abusive. Come to find out she did that w other dudes who didn’t give into her as far as acting like an entitled princess. The same goes w the word narcissistic. A lot of women call men that because he didn’t cater to her ever want. Maybe he really so what you say. So he may be good at manipulating people. It’s possible they’re taking his side regardless because they’ve known him longer. There’s a lot of possibilities.

[Anonymous]

It would piss me off too. One thing I know from personal experience is that abusive people almost always convince the people around them they THEY were the victims. So, this dude might have played that same card with all of the colleagues and convinced them that you were the abusive one. Literally every abusive ex I've had has done this, so it wouldn't surprise me if he did this same thing.