Have you had an ex who became a worse version of themselves?

[Noredcarpet]

I have examples of exes when this happened. I became aware of it as others we knew would tell me what I considered was long after we split when I'm thinking he as well as I had gotten over the split and he ought to be back as his usual self.

When told these things I felt as if I didn't recognize him. I did not want to engage, give it energy, and the sentence "I don't know him anymore" came into my head.

I would think to myself if he had always been like this, only hid it from me, or I had been so blind back when we were a couple that I hadn't seen that side of him.

Has anyone else experienced this? Why is it, you think? These things had nothing to do with me, but were stuff other people in his life reacted negatively towards.

[Summeroflove]

Well…. For some people they mask who they really are… meaning you don’t see them for their true colors until after the relationship is over and the mask comes off.

As for other times…. Yeah breakups hurt. But not only do you hurt yourself being with the wrong person. You waste their time as well. So breaking up when it isn’t right is the best thing for both people. And you can’t let someone guilt trip you into getting back with them because they fell into a depression.

[Iron_Man]

What do you expect after a break up knowing that it’s really over. You think They’re gonna be all friendly with you and tell you everything they’re gonna be very defensive. My thought is once a man and woman have dated. You cannot be friends after it just won’t work out. There’s too much jealousy involved.

[Noredcarpet]

No offense I hope but I think you have misunderstood my words. I had no intention to be his friend or be anything. It was only that we knew some of the same people. Other than that I was careful not to mix our worlds anymore. My guess is the one telling me this was used to seeing us as a couple. But honestly I don't know why I was told anything. I had distanced myself before from these people too just because I was aware we both knew them. My first response when being told was that I was suddenly back in time as my instinct was to feel loyalty towards him, gesture of the old me when we were a couple. I didn't know what to say. I agree with you about the rest you wrote.

[Noredcarpet]

I would like to add another thing, I did date someone that after I told him I couldn't he told me we should be friends. For a while there I tried to cope for everyone elses sake, friends circle we both had thought it was convinient, but in the end I couldn't do it, told him so. I could reveal more about it but don't want to, but yea it was a terrible idea.

[Iron_Man]

I hope everything works out for you

[Noredcarpet]

Thank you, that's kind of you, yeah I hope so too, one day, you know, one day 😀 take care

[Iron_Man]

Yes 👍

[Bitter_Sweet94]

Yeah, I’ve seen that happen.

Sometimes people don’t actually grow after a breakup, they double down on their bad habits.

It’s a reminder that not everyone evolves just because time passes.

Some people only show who they really were all along.

[jennifer_bloom]

All the guys I’ve liked, have looked and acted religious, so if their personality is real and not fake, they should get more excellent over time.

[Nikki1989]

It seems most men do this (if you are lucky). Occasionally their true colors appear while you are still together.