Since when does a dumper need a closure?

[Anonymous]

My ex broke up with me exactly one month ago to try something with my "best friend" and now that I've made the steps to move on and started dating he came back. I had begun NC and then after a few days he began to texting me and calling me. So like an idiot I have answered his calls. He called asking me how I've been and updates on my life. He then mentions my feelings for him and I get on the defensive and we get on arguments. He is in an official relationship with the woman I thought was my best friend and yet he keeps asking me when I'm meeting up with him to “talk”. When I refuse he gets upset and asks me very defensive questions and throw in my face how happy he is with her and things they've done, that we never did. So today he sent me a text asking him to meet him someplace and giving him closure. Why would a dumper, who is "happily" in another relationship, need closure?

[BrunetteNYC]

He's full of it and thought the grass was greener on the other side, but if he did this once, he will do it again. Cut him off, unless you did something to hurt him and cause this ugly behavior. If you did nothing wrong and he's just a betraying cheater, let it go. DON'T MEET HIM and I would tell/show her that he's still trying to see you.

[Asker]

I'm afraid i did a lot of things but not on purpose. I was misdiagnosed with bi-polar disorder and i was medicated on it. I began to have manias and began to aggressively attack people. Attacking them verbally and emotionally. My boyfriend was one of my victims as well as my "friend”. They say I pushed them together due to the comfort they found in each other. I humiliated him plenty of times. I laughed in his face when he said he loved me and I started a damn vicious cycle without knowing the full extent of my actions. I keep breaking up with him and he always came crying and asking me that no matter how hard i pushed him he was going to stick to it he was going to fight for me. He cried and begged every time I would break up with him and he would chase me saying he loved me. There was this one fight we ad where I walked almost half-ways to his house just to break up with him. He ended up finding me and he was crying. I told him to fuck off.

[BrunetteNYC]

well that is cruel and sick, and I think that unless your condition is fully treated and you enter therapy, it's pointless to date because God forbid this will happen again. That's not good for you or the person you date.

[Asker]

I was in therapy for a year and when my depression because to severe I was recommended to a doctor. She gave the wrong diagnosis. Even my therapist was confused because he diagnosed me as depressed but e went along with it. Now I am seeing someone else and she agrees I was misdiagnosed. Im not a cruel person and that reaction was way beyond my usual behavior. I refused to date now because of it and although he was aware of the problem it took a huge toll on him. This all happen in a spam of two weeks and once I got rid of the meds, it was too late. He had already gotten so tired of it.

[523206720]

He still has feelings for you. Don't accept him back. If he wants to be with you he needs to prove it to you since he dumped you for another girl.

[Asker]

How should i proceed then?

[523206720]

Be hard to get so he doesn't do this to you again.

[Asker]

I met up with him a few days ago and this is what I observed. He seemed very mixed... His words were not matching his actions. Said he cares for me as a person. He and the other girl love each other very much. Then he turns around he misses me so much, everything we used to have, but not the romantic aspect of it. That I treated him like a king. Then he turns around says he enjoyed kissing me, hugging me, having me in his arms, and blah blah blah. Then again he turns around and says he upgraded! Then he switches again and says how he loves how I smell and how gorgeous I look in my pictures. He then reminded me that on the 24th we would our celebrated out 7th month. He says that I'm his best friend and he didn't want that to be out last time hanging out but he didn't know how his girlfriend would feel about us being "friends" again. I'm flattered that she still sees me as a treat considering I'm the girl he left for her :P

[523206720]

If she treats him poorly he might come back to you. I think you are better off looking for other guys though.

[Asker]

He says they argue all the time and that she's always around without giving him much time to himself. I still hold very deep feelings for him. I've been dating two other guys but I can't seem to get myself past this.

[Anonymous]

Please tell me you're not actually going to fall for his crap? lmao..

[Asker]

Im very reluctant to agree...

[Opinion Owner]

He wants you to be desperately in love with him and not able to move on.. how small of him. Ignore the calls. Ignore the texts. Time to find a real man.

[juggaloscrub]

He screwed up and wants to test the water with you again. Don't fall for it. Let him and your "best friend" enjoy each other and move on.

[Asker]

Is that the case? He told me in all the phone conversations that "I'm so happy with her! Even though we argue every single day I love every minute of it!" He tells me he upgraded and that he loves her. He told me he just cared but as a friend since I was his best friend and partner in crime and he missed everything about me.

[juggaloscrub]

Sure sounds like he's playing games. Of course he will say he's happy. He wants you to get jealous. And if he's telling you that he upgraded and how in love with her he is why even listen to him. Why have him say those hurtful things to you. Tell him, then go be happy and leave me the hell alone!

[Asker]

I did and he told me he will after meeting in person. He said "I just want to see your face one last time"

[juggaloscrub]

Omg!!! My friend just used that one! He ended up getting in her pants...one last time. Don't buy his bullshit. He might not even be trying to get in your pants but he has a motive and it's not in your best interest.

[Asker]

LOL wow... thanks! :) im kinda new at this relationship kind of a thing

[juggaloscrub]

No problem. I wish you all the best with your situation. Just be careful guys are crafty.