A Solution For The Nice Guys

Anonymous

If you feel like you've been taken advantage of by girls for being nice and doing things for them but they totally ignored you otherwise....then:

Don't do favors for a girl unless you're DATING her already! Or getting sex.

A Solution For The Nice Guys

Whatever it is that you want from a relationship with her, don't do anything until the relationship is there first. So for all the complaining nice guys, please stop doing favors for people you barely know or who ignore you! She won't like or want to date/fuck you just because you do stuff for her.

A Solution For The Nice Guys
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Most Helpful Guy

  • MrOracle
    To the guys answering here: it's possible to be nice/pleasant/interesting without paying for meals, giving a girl rides, washing her car, doing her schoolwork, or being her emotional tampon (comforting her when the bad boys she dates hurt her feelings).

    Hard to imagine, I know, but, yes, you CAN appeal to women in other ways.
    Is this still revelant?
    • Anonymous

      yes! that's what I meant.

Most Helpful Girl

  • thedevilwithin
    You should be nice to everybody, but especially to yourself and not let anyone take advantage.
    But as long as you don't act all entitled just because you are being nice to someone, because the unfortunate reality is not everyone in the world is as nice as you are and they don't have to be.
    Is this still revelant?

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What Girls & Guys Said

011
  • Scrambledagain
    Short and sweet, and practical. I like it. BUT how does a guy land a date without being nice? True question? How do you win a ladies heart without being nice. Give a short answer to that, and that will be gold.
    • abcdgg

      As octavius there's nothing wrong with doing things for people without expecting anything in return. But if you want a girl to notice you, either get hot, become successful at something, or get rich.

    • Anonymous

      @abcdgg if you're happy, this wouldn't apply to you obviously lol anyway @Scarmbledagain I think being unavailable would help. or at least not acting desperate/like you need her.

    • abcdgg

      if you're nice you can have a foursome. ask cristiano ronaldo. he returned a phone to a girl and hooked up with her and her friends all at the same time. sometimes it pays to be nice

    • Show All
  • Not just girls but don't be a slave of anyone. Be nice and do nice things but yeah 'favours'! Don't do favours. Try to make efforts for the people who genuinely care for you in life. That'd be more than enough.

    And it doesn't mean that you should sit inside your house. Girls won't knock your door. Opportunities won't come, make them happen.
  • bloodmountain1990
    Agreed. And I think many of us men fall into this trap, myself included, and it needs to stop. I mean you can be respectful and pay for dates, etc but buying gifts and going out of your way to do favors early on comes off as desperate.

    And yes, I used to but into that bullshit by doing common courtesy shit like opening doors on purpose and wonder why they would be turned off and it makes perfect sense. They see right through that and can tell that you're just doing it to get something in return. They probably figure that you and many guys do it because you think she's hot and that you wouldn't do it for ugly/unattractive women.

    Besides you should impress them by being yourself, not buying them out and doing tedious common courtesy to impress them.
    • I partially blame the media for leading guys into thinking that getting women is a step by step transaction and how girls want a nice guy who will do anything for them. That's like how some girls think having sex early on will make a guy stay. Both do the opposite of what they intend to do.

    • Anonymous

      yep, this is what I was talking about! you're only the 2nd guy on here that got that. and for sex, I have had friends that tried to make a guy wait and found out he'd been fucking other girls before he even met them, but he pretended to be romantic...

    • elric

      Couldn't agree more. Being the nice guy, with chivalry and such, will not get you where you want to go. Girls often know that or figure, that the reason you are so nice is because you want something, which is viewed as duplicitous and manipulative.

    • Show All
  • GreatnessPersonified
    Thank you for this.
    I was trying to say the same thing for years now, but couldn't put it on simple words.
    • Anonymous

      yw dude.

  • ArchDruidMordred
    I don't know. Quite a few girls came to like me BECAUSE I cared about them when I didn't even know them all that well.
    • Anonymous

      so you did stuff for them? and did you have sex with any of the girls (if you wanted it)?

    • No. They did WANT to have sex with me though.

    • Anonymous

      so why didn't you just do it?

    • Show All
  • James19
    I love the honesty of yours always. Great take by the way.
    • Anonymous

      ty. always though? do you read my other posts?

  • Octavius
    Can't I do nice things for them just because?
    • Anonymous

      did you read it?

    • abcdgg

      winner

    • Octavius

      Yes. I'm just wondering why I can't do nice things for people just for the sake of being nice?

    • Show All
  • jjmarvin
    Or you know, be nice without a reason
    • Anonymous

      you're like the 3rd guy to say that... I wonder why that hits a nerve? anyway, since you're not complaining or feeling taken advantage of, this mytake wouldn't have anything to do with you...

      unless you guys do feel that way and you don't want to admit it?

    • jjmarvin

      It hits a nerve because they create a stereotype and it negatively effects people who don't do that.

      In not assuming you're talking about me.

    • Anonymous

      oh! you mean like guys only doing favors for sex... well, that happens a lot.

  • Anonymous
    nice guys finish last trala lalala
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xfeys7Jfnx8
  • Anonymous
    The problem I had was that I put her problems and needs before mine. Women do want a nice, good man. What they don't want is a push over. If you aren't comfortable with something, say so. If they don't like you for it, then they weren't meant to be with you anyways.
  • Anonymous
    What about the really ugly dudes?
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