Hey everyone. I'm gonna tell you a story. There's this guy and in all honesty, he's all I want in a guy. He is funny, smart, artistically talented (especially when it comes to music), and he has great character despite his rough past. I've seen him at his best and also his worse. He feels the same way....
But I can't be with him.
This guy has one negative to him, and it is a deal-breaker for me: He's younger than me. Not by a month, not even by a year, but by three years.
Now, I can already hear your remarks: "What? Three years isn't a lot! Why would that hold you back??" Well let me tell you this: it is a lot if you're a grade 12 girl and he's only in grade 9.
My school is a really nice place. Everyone (for the most part) is super friendly and we don't have a lot, if any, drug problems around. But there are rumors that always float around in any high school, and there are always people who judge you. For example, there is a guy named Johnny in my school. He's a cool guy and he is in grade 12. But lately its weird because he has been dating a grade 9 girl. People slightly judge him and to be completely honest, I do too a bit.
I care about people's opinions. I spent my whole life striving to maintain my clean slate. I have never kissed or dated anyone, I have never swore or made inappropriate jokes, never drank or smoked despite peer pressure. I always try to be 100% honest and I hate lying. I'd hate for someone to ask me if I ever swore or drank and I'd have to lie because I like being innocent. So the best way not to lie is by not doing what I deem not innocent.
Take for example Taylor Swift. It is not unknown that she dates despite the age gap. She's dated from as young as the guy above and Harry Styles to as old as John Mayer and Jake Gyllanhaal. Not only do people judge her for dating a lot of guys (which has only been 8 guys in ten years despite what rumors are), but she is judged saying she shouldn't date so young, and that she can only get young guys. People even ask "why can't she find a guy that's actually her age?"
So if I dated a grade 9, people would be surprised. I'm known as a super innocent nice person because I try my best to do the right thing. Now this isn't me bragging, just an achievement of mine. People would judge me and him. People already make fun of me for hanging out with grade 9s. I did this because I know how nice it is to have an older person actually enjoy hanging out with you, and those kids are pretty cool! (I hang out with grade 12s and 13s a lot too dont worry.) But let's get back on track.
I care about what others think of me. I'm insecure and I can't just let it go. It is a quality of mine I possess. I thrive off of doing good things and being nice and others appreciating me.
I wish we were both out of highschool. Then it wouldn't be so strange. Then I could date him.
I hope you enjoyed my babbling and ranting that I called a MyTake.