He Cheated on Me With My BFF!

He Cheated on Me With My BFF!

I know that you have heard many stories of cheating, and betrayal- frankly it is becoming a popular trend in this modern dating world. How sad it has become that if a man/woman treat each other like crap, the first we say is “at least he didn’t cheat on you”.

I don’t know all the details of what happened or even how it started/happened. Therefore, I will share how things happened, in hopes that you will be careful and perhaps learn something on the signs to save yourself the heartache that I had from losing a boyfriend and a best friend at the same time.

So here it is, my best friend of 8 years- Alana always had my back. We went to high school and university together. She has been there through my best and worst times. We went out together, baked cookies together, she held me when I cried about my ex… and I never saw it coming.

I met Jared in my University economy class. He was super sweet and smart. We hit it off and it wasn’t long before, we celebrated our 1 year anniversary. He got me beautiful flowers, and wrote me romantic notes, and I felt like I was in heaven. Our sex life was good, and I couldn’t really complain about a thing.

I recall that I was over at Alana’s house as she was cooking pasta and invited me over. As I was waiting for the food, Alana was being silly and grabbed a wet noodle and whipped it around, it ended up sticking to the wall and we both laughed. She went to the bathroom to wash her hands, while I chuckled and told her “I gotta get a photo of this”. My phone was in my purse at the front entrance, so I grabbed Alana’s phone from the table beside me and clicked on the camera icon. I snapped the photo, and went to click on “share” to send it to my phone. My finger swiped onto the next photo accidentally, and guess what I saw? At first, nothing seemed abnormal. It was a zoomed in photo of an overloaded pizza, with a poor attempt at using ranch sauce as a tool to write “Alana” with a heart around it. But then, I saw the table, and a man’s foot in a sock at the corner of the photo. I knew very well whose table that is, and exactly at what guy wore “puma” sock religiously.

He Cheated on Me With My BFF!

Alana walked back in, and saw the look on my face. “Whats wrong?” she asked. I walked over to her, as I was so angry I was holding myself back. “I am only going to ask you this once, and if I find out that you lied to me I will never speak to you again. Confess and I may forgive you”. My voice started to crack. Alana played stupid and said “what are you talking about?” I went right for it… “are you an Jared sleeping together?” She hesitated, and I could tell that she was scared. “We have been hanging out, but I don’t know”. At this point I couldn’t take it, I turned around to grab my purse and walk out. Alana stood there frozen.

As I slammed the door on my way out, I paused as I waited for the elevator in her condo. I heard Alana saying something, so I quietly walked back to her door. I could barely hear, but I am pretty certain I made out “yeah well wtf that’s not my problem, she found out so…” The elevator opened up and I got in. I knew that Alana was probably on the phone with Jared, so I sent him a final text “hope it was worth it, this is a written warning to cease and desist any communication to me or else I will report you to the police”. Jared called me a few times that evening, and even blocked his number to try to get a hold of me.

I cried and cried for a few months. The sad part about this whole thing is that Alana didn’t even try to apologize. She messaged me a few times, saying that she misses me, but I couldn’t bring myself to respond.

It has been 2 years since the incident, both Jared and Alana are out of my life. This whole experience has made me stronger, and I realized that good people are hard to come by. I don’t care about the justification or rationalization behind what they did behind my back. I got my closure when my silence and self-healing made me whole again.

He Cheated on Me With My BFF!
He Cheated on Me With My BFF!
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8Girl Opinion
22Guy Opinion

Most Helpful Guy

  • Unit1
    Girl... you make me so proud :O

    Hope you're alright for now. That was backstabbing^2. I can not even imagine this much at once happening.

    But I really loved how you went straight to the point and confidently.
    Hopefully you will find much better people than backstabbers.

    GOOD LUCK!!!
    Is this still revelant?

Most Helpful Girl

  • SheDevilxx
    Fuck both of them. You don't need people like that in your life so go out and find people who would treat you like the amazing person you really are <3 <3 <3
    Is this still revelant?

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What Girls & Guys Said

  • little_bird1
    I went through similar thing. She wasn't my best friend, though, but still a really good, close friend. She was a bit weird so people didn't really like her, she was mostly avoided, but I liked her. My boyfriend (now ex) that I was with for 3 years when they first met also liked her. They didn't meet sooner because she was away in another country for few years. I was so glad that he didn't hate her like everybody else did. I think they clicked because they were into the same sport, so they had stuff to talk about. I would someone invite her to hang out with us and vise versa, and it all seemed lovely until they started hanging out without me. His excuse was that they are playing tennis together. I suck at tennis and for the first time ever I was jealous. Little by little they started hanging out more often and that's when started getting that awful feeling. I confronted both of them but they were always giving me the same response - that I'm imagining things. I had no other proof then that feeling, so I decided to drop it. A year went by and one time I had to go for a business trip somewhere. I was supposed to stay for a week, but we finished work earlier and were heading home sooner. I wanted to surprise my boyfriend (since he was texting me non stop how he misses me and can't wait for me to come back) so when our plane landed (late at night) I went to his place. I rang but no one was answering. I tried to unlock the doors but they were already unlocked so I went in. And boy what I saw... The bathroom doors were opened and the two of them were banging in the shower. I stood there for a minute, completely shocked, until they noticed me. Their reaction was as if they saw a ghost. I just turned around, slammed the door and went back home. The saddest part is that we never spoke again. Neither one of them tried calling me or apologizing. I even left all my stuff at his place, never to take them back again. It's been two years now and I'm okay. Can't say that it made me stronger because no matter how strong you are you can never be 100% sure and it happen anytime. It's out of our control. The only thing I learned is to never doubt my gut feeling again.
  • juststrollin
    :0 Omg nooo what dicks, good people are really hard to come by and i know because i am a good person and i have had bad run ins. I will always respect others relationships as i alue my own too, im so so so so sorry, and alana most likely was jealous of you. I've seen this in betrayal stories before, the best riend who is jealoous will tend to do this, or just people without a emotional capacity, im learning and unfortunately many dont have the capacity
  • godfatherfan
    If she dated your boyfriend she was not your BFF. I know women don't have friends like men do. Your bond with other women are not as deep as men. but still, if she was really a friend, she would have respected you.
  • BrittBratt2416
    Not a friend at all, just wolf in sheeps clothing. I know why some girls don't want to introduce their man to their friends now. But what Karma will get one or both of them..
  • HarrisonWells
    That's what happens when people are assholes. Glad you had the courage to drop these toxic parasites from your life
  • JohnDoe3000
    It's good (and smart) that you stood your ground and didn't give either of them the chance to slither back into your life.

    I wish you the best!
  • Browneye57
    You really shouldn't take these things too hard - instead assume you dodged a huge bullet. Better now than later, after you're married to him. Or you started a family. Yes, people do this, has nothing to do with being your boyfriend or girlfriend.
  • DiegoO
    She was never your friend and he never appreciated what he had with you. Don´t let them into your life again, the two of them deserve to learn in the hard way there are lines that shouldn´t be crossed.
  • This_is_my_username
    they'll get what's coming to them. What goes around comes around... this is undeniable
  • Imhotep99
    I'm sorry to hear that he cheated on you with your bff. It was a really shitty thing to do.
    Glad they're out of your life. You're one brave woman.
  • JuicyBrain
    Why would you call the police? Cheating is not against the law...
    • I think she meant that she'd report him to the police if he tries to contact her.

    • JuicyBrain

      @Miss_Behave Well, unless she gets a restraining order, the police can't do much...

  • John_Doesnt
    I'd probably cheat on you too, but only because I'm a Dr.
  • Idonotgivearatsass
    Sounds like they're living in the now and not some old fashioned idea of life, it's 2017, this is the future people, get used to it.
  • Ovidiu-Nicolae
    You should knew that friends can be more worse than enemies
  • unknownpoet
    that's what happens when you don't know how to satisfy a men
  • TheFlak38
    Because real friendship rarely exist between women.
  • yourwinglady
    Wow, that's the ultimate betrayal. So sorry.
  • Anonymous
    My girlfriend shared me with her bff and her sister.
  • Anonymous
    Wow, that's really fucked up.
  • Anonymous
    wtf report them to the police? you sound batshit crazy, honestly probably why he went for her instead
  • Anonymous
    Like movies really.. sorry that you had to go through all this. wish you the best
  • Anonymous
    Northerngal90 would you like to share
  • Anonymous
    i have been cheated to with my friend n even it was so bad at first i became stronger like u
  • Anonymous
    omg it's better that i stay single. i don't want a girl to rip off my heart by cheating with my best friend. i have never been in a relationship. I feel pretty vulnerable to this everytime.
    • DiegoO

      Don´t be coward..

    • Anonymous

      @DiegoO will consider your thoughts after my mba.

  • Anonymous
    good now you know she wasn't a friend and he wasn't for you.
  • Anonymous
    I love seeing the destruction of this post feminist era. I'm loving it. See what happens when you girls fuck with gender roles. Now deal with it. Oh yea... i'm going to enjoy stories like this... women are going to be so depressed
  • Anonymous
    I think you are being a little dramatic.
  • Anonymous
    That's shitty of both of them. Glad you dropped them from your life