Girls don't want nice guys.. they want GENUINE guys. Oh, and if you're gonna respond to this with "But I AM genuinely a nice guy," yeah, so was I (supposedly)!
Most of y'all a wusses. And weridos. And hide behind the guise of being a "NICE GUY" and complain luke babies when you don't get your way. And y'all try to date above your pay grade or people u have zero in common with.
Dude, I MARRIED above my pay grade. It's a hell of a ride, but I'm not getting off. Man has to WORK for his rewards, and if a man won't put in the hard work, he doesn't get his rewards.
I've always liked the nice, sweet guys. My husband is one. He is devoted to God, to me, and to our children, and he really knows how to cherish a woman. He's sweet. And wonderful.
no, those type of girls are just like that because they're not fully matured, and unfortunately the majority of girls our age will continue to think like that until they calm down and grow up.
to be more specific this only applies to girls who think their lives are like movies, or they want to be seen as wild, and adult-like, going to parties and whatnot. If you meet real women I doubt these things wil happen note how I refer to them as women, and to the girls as girls
@TayTay21 Not really. I don't think all women don't want nice guys (though it does seem like that some times) but we absolutely know for a FACT that women do actively seek out the assholes. Obviously not all women but a substantial population of them do. Every single time you hear a woman lament that all men are assholes, that's because she has actively sought the asshole men, they where not nice guys then suddenly turned into an asshole out of the blue. Its not like the nice guy she was with was bit by an asshole and now every full moon he is cursed to become an asshole, he was always an asshole and she actively chose him. Its important that women call out this stuff, just like if a buy can say that yes, some guys act nice in the hopes of exploiting her trust, then I think its only fair that women admit that yes, their are plenty of women out their who really do seek out assholes. I don't know why women are so against criticizing "their own" when we know that their is SOME truth to it
@TayTay21www.dailymail.co.uk/.../...ow-Im-childless-42.html The fact is some times women do toss aside a nice guy because they want excitement that the asshole brings (because he essentially gas lights her and keeps things at a high emotional intensity which plays on women's natural tendencies toward drama (if a man is emotional with her then he cares and is invested in the relationship still (according to one study: www.telegraph.co.uk/.../...r-partner-is-upset.html ) which assholes can exploit this mechanism making it "exciting" to be around them even though its more like a drug which will inevitably take its negative toll). Just like a woman can bat her eyes, get a little flirty and show a little cleavage and get a man to do things he wouldn't normally do, we both have exploitable mechanisms.
@hellionthesagereborn Against criticizing my own? LOL I get along WAY better with guys than I do with girls. Most girls dislike me, and I dislike them back, so you don't know what you're talking about. You're talking about a small group of girls but saying "girls" in your post rather than "some girls" or "a subset of girls." That's why we react this way to these posts. You're telling us all what we think and how we feel. I thought some alpha badass guys were cool when I was like 14. By the time I was 17 I thought they were idiots.
@TayTay21 I am not talking about who you get along with, I am talking about criticism. I have noticed that women do not criticize other women even when they know that their is an issue (also this has been shown to be the case, its called the "women are swell" affect as women have significantly greater ingroup bias). Again, we know that their are plenty of women (not all, I don't know if I would even say half but a good amount) who do go after assholes just like we know that their are a good many men (not all, I wouldn't even say about half, but a good many) who go after the "slutty/hot" girls instead of the nice girls. We know that its a thing, we shouldn't judge the entire gender based upon it but we should acknowledge that it exists and recognize the source of it so that we can better avoid those poor decisions. So in short, no I am not telling you all what you think and feel, I was quite clear it was SOME women not all women. This is the bias I was reffering to.
@hellionthesagereborn “I don't know why women are so against criticizing "their own" when we know that their is SOME truth to it”
Aren’t you doing exactly the same, basically saying the blame is on the women? Have you ever thought that if a woman you’re pursuing (I guess you factually (?) made it all women!) likes the drama and actively looks for assholes, maybe she isn’t a good quality woman? What does that say about the “nice” guys who actively pursue women addicted to drama and being mistreated?
All mature women I know are looking for nice guys. One only looks for players when they wanna have fun and aren’t looking for a serious relationship.
No. In this one scenario and example women will not criticize women, that's not saying men don't have issues which I listed out several of them (which @TayTay21 was more then happy to try and point out and accuse men of but then is vehemently trying to argue against when it comes time to point out the flaws in women). So not sure how we can draw comparisons to me pointing out that their are some men who go after slutty women and their are some men who pretend to be nice to take advantage of women but their are also women who go after assholes and then claim that I am doing the same thing as she is when she says that men do all of those things but women don't do anything like that. Those are polar opposites in fact. As for saying I made it all women, no, I did not. I stated women are based upon the data (which I provided) are more prone to certain behaviors not that they where unable to do otherwise. That's kind of like saying that since men naturally have a higher sex drive that they
are all promiscuous cheaters, that is of course not the case, they have a biological inclination towards a behavior, it doesn't mean they follow it through every single time or that they respond to it all the same way. Again, that is not what I stated (I even made great pains to make it absolutely clear I was not saying all women (I can provide you the exact quote if you want (though if you didn't read it the first couple of times I don't think you would read it this time.). So again, I feel like you and her are both ignoring everything I have stated and have selectively altered my statements to turn it into a straw man argument which does not resemble anything of what I said. As for your statement about a woman not wanting one of those guys except for non serious relationships (and thus inadvertently admitting to the very thing I have been saying all along), how is that a good thing? If a woman actively pursued that kind of man, why would a man want to be with her?
That's one of the big problems, she goes off for these guys when she is young (which the OP actually stated) and then when she gets older she "settles" for a nice guy i. e. he is plan B and is just a place holder (in the mind of many men) for the bad boy/asshole that she wanted but didn't want her. It also shows a marked lack of foresight and highly impulsive behavior which is very undesirable (which is also why I find it odd that women go after these kinds of men because well its not exactly a desirable trait for any rational person to be with some one that is selfish and impulsive and who refuses to see the big long term picture because they are to busy with feeling good now).
that's so true. cause as long as you think "being the nice guy" will get you anywhere, you won't get anywhere unless you get lucky. so yeah. nice guys finish once they finally stop being the nice guy ^^
No, nice guys don’t finish last. That’s total bullshit. If you consider yourself a nice guy and find yourself complaining often about how nobody likes you, you’re probably not nearly as nice as you think you are.
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Anonymous
(18-24)
+1 y
Wow this is so terrible. Obviously you had a bad dating life and want other men to believe what you believe.
Stupid mentality and labeling is why dating in the modern day world fucking sucks, I'm glad I quit dating, everyone is quick to judge and no one is ever happy, we live in a world of idiots
I have Aspergers and social anxiety and personally I think it's just because it's happened to him so many times when he is being "nice " he now thinks it's fact
Also if you're an average guy doing what this guy said doesn't work. You have to approach girls left and right and hope that maybe one will have her head screwed on straight. After all, this is the kind of woman you want anyways.
Women these days don’t want commitment. Love is dead now. Just go MGTOW and do something positive for other people and for yourself. 90% of women today seriously needs to see a therapist.
Us guys can seek out "The hot & the good women" all we wish to,... that doesn't automatically mean The hot & the good women will think those nice guys will be their type. I know plenty of confident guys who have spoken to plenty of women, but those ladies have turn those confident guys down all because they are not their type.
@McKellar it is not a fixed theory tho and a hot & good woman is not necessarily a model but a woman who makes sense in general. After everything we can go through during our experiences in relationship, a genuinely good woman won't reject a good man
TL;DR version people's conscious and subconscious don't always want the same things and those in denial of the power of their subconscious will not want what they say they want.
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
66Opinion
Girls don't want nice guys.. they want GENUINE guys.
Oh, and if you're gonna respond to this with "But I AM genuinely a nice guy," yeah, so was I (supposedly)!
Then I got some self-awareness. ^_^
Most of y'all a wusses. And weridos. And hide behind the guise of being a "NICE GUY" and complain luke babies when you don't get your way.
And y'all try to date above your pay grade or people u have zero in common with.
Dude, I MARRIED above my pay grade. It's a hell of a ride, but I'm not getting off. Man has to WORK for his rewards, and if a man won't put in the hard work, he doesn't get his rewards.
Your 46 your generation of men were more manly. My gen are soft
So, then, you get the best pickings...
I've always liked the nice, sweet guys. My husband is one. He is devoted to God, to me, and to our children, and he really knows how to cherish a woman. He's sweet. And wonderful.
He sounds like a genuine nice guy. Most who call themselves nice guys are just manipulators.
no, those type of girls are just like that because they're not fully matured, and unfortunately the majority of girls our age will continue to think like that until they calm down and grow up.
to be more specific this only applies to girls who think their lives are like movies, or they want to be seen as wild, and adult-like, going to parties and whatnot. If you meet real women I doubt these things wil happen note how I refer to them as women, and to the girls as girls
You're right.
Yeah, and why is it always what GUYS say after spending a lifetime trying to be nice to the wrong girls...
So true. All these guys seem to lust after these hot ass tatted bishes who are into bikers and pro athletes.
@TayTay21 Not really. I don't think all women don't want nice guys (though it does seem like that some times) but we absolutely know for a FACT that women do actively seek out the assholes. Obviously not all women but a substantial population of them do. Every single time you hear a woman lament that all men are assholes, that's because she has actively sought the asshole men, they where not nice guys then suddenly turned into an asshole out of the blue. Its not like the nice guy she was with was bit by an asshole and now every full moon he is cursed to become an asshole, he was always an asshole and she actively chose him. Its important that women call out this stuff, just like if a buy can say that yes, some guys act nice in the hopes of exploiting her trust, then I think its only fair that women admit that yes, their are plenty of women out their who really do seek out assholes. I don't know why women are so against criticizing "their own" when we know that their is SOME truth to it
@TayTay21 www.dailymail.co.uk/.../...ow-Im-childless-42.html
The fact is some times women do toss aside a nice guy because they want excitement that the asshole brings (because he essentially gas lights her and keeps things at a high emotional intensity which plays on women's natural tendencies toward drama (if a man is emotional with her then he cares and is invested in the relationship still (according to one study: www.telegraph.co.uk/.../...r-partner-is-upset.html ) which assholes can exploit this mechanism making it "exciting" to be around them even though its more like a drug which will inevitably take its negative toll). Just like a woman can bat her eyes, get a little flirty and show a little cleavage and get a man to do things he wouldn't normally do, we both have exploitable mechanisms.
@hellionthesagereborn Against criticizing my own? LOL I get along WAY better with guys than I do with girls. Most girls dislike me, and I dislike them back, so you don't know what you're talking about. You're talking about a small group of girls but saying "girls" in your post rather than "some girls" or "a subset of girls." That's why we react this way to these posts. You're telling us all what we think and how we feel. I thought some alpha badass guys were cool when I was like 14. By the time I was 17 I thought they were idiots.
I agree with this dude
@TayTay21 I am not talking about who you get along with, I am talking about criticism. I have noticed that women do not criticize other women even when they know that their is an issue (also this has been shown to be the case, its called the "women are swell" affect as women have significantly greater ingroup bias). Again, we know that their are plenty of women (not all, I don't know if I would even say half but a good amount) who do go after assholes just like we know that their are a good many men (not all, I wouldn't even say about half, but a good many) who go after the "slutty/hot" girls instead of the nice girls. We know that its a thing, we shouldn't judge the entire gender based upon it but we should acknowledge that it exists and recognize the source of it so that we can better avoid those poor decisions. So in short, no I am not telling you all what you think and feel, I was quite clear it was SOME women not all women. This is the bias I was reffering to.
@hellionthesagereborn “I don't know why women are so against criticizing "their own" when we know that their is SOME truth to it”
Aren’t you doing exactly the same, basically saying the blame is on the women?
Have you ever thought that if a woman you’re pursuing (I guess you factually (?) made it all women!) likes the drama and actively looks for assholes, maybe she isn’t a good quality woman? What does that say about the “nice” guys who actively pursue women addicted to drama and being mistreated?
All mature women I know are looking for nice guys. One only looks for players when they wanna have fun and aren’t looking for a serious relationship.
No. In this one scenario and example women will not criticize women, that's not saying men don't have issues which I listed out several of them (which @TayTay21 was more then happy to try and point out and accuse men of but then is vehemently trying to argue against when it comes time to point out the flaws in women). So not sure how we can draw comparisons to me pointing out that their are some men who go after slutty women and their are some men who pretend to be nice to take advantage of women but their are also women who go after assholes and then claim that I am doing the same thing as she is when she says that men do all of those things but women don't do anything like that. Those are polar opposites in fact. As for saying I made it all women, no, I did not. I stated women are based upon the data (which I provided) are more prone to certain behaviors not that they where unable to do otherwise. That's kind of like saying that since men naturally have a higher sex drive that they
are all promiscuous cheaters, that is of course not the case, they have a biological inclination towards a behavior, it doesn't mean they follow it through every single time or that they respond to it all the same way. Again, that is not what I stated (I even made great pains to make it absolutely clear I was not saying all women (I can provide you the exact quote if you want (though if you didn't read it the first couple of times I don't think you would read it this time.). So again, I feel like you and her are both ignoring everything I have stated and have selectively altered my statements to turn it into a straw man argument which does not resemble anything of what I said. As for your statement about a woman not wanting one of those guys except for non serious relationships (and thus inadvertently admitting to the very thing I have been saying all along), how is that a good thing? If a woman actively pursued that kind of man, why would a man want to be with her?
That's one of the big problems, she goes off for these guys when she is young (which the OP actually stated) and then when she gets older she "settles" for a nice guy i. e. he is plan B and is just a place holder (in the mind of many men) for the bad boy/asshole that she wanted but didn't want her. It also shows a marked lack of foresight and highly impulsive behavior which is very undesirable (which is also why I find it odd that women go after these kinds of men because well its not exactly a desirable trait for any rational person to be with some one that is selfish and impulsive and who refuses to see the big long term picture because they are to busy with feeling good now).
Dude you should post a myTake. Definitely
I get told that a lot! I might have to do that (only wrote one in the three years I've been here so maybe its about time for another. Will see.).
So girls want bad boys then they want nice guys. And boys want bad girls then they want good girls?
Oh.. downvoters... huh..
So boys don't want bad girls to start with.. or they don't want good girls at all?
that's so true. cause as long as you think "being the nice guy" will get you anywhere, you won't get anywhere unless you get lucky. so yeah. nice guys finish once they finally stop being the nice guy ^^
No, nice guys don’t finish last. That’s total bullshit. If you consider yourself a nice guy and find yourself complaining often about how nobody likes you, you’re probably not nearly as nice as you think you are.
Wow this is so terrible. Obviously you had a bad dating life and want other men to believe what you believe.
Nah. I've had a pretty good dating life.
But thanks for your random senseless assumption 👌
I used to be nice.
Now I'm distant and aloof.
It's the only way to do it, fellas.
Stupid mentality and labeling is why dating in the modern day world fucking sucks, I'm glad I quit dating, everyone is quick to judge and no one is ever happy, we live in a world of idiots
I think im as much of a "nice guy" as you can get, and i never had problems with girls.
Being nice doesn't make someone desirable. That's expected for a partner. It's like the bare minimum. Nobody deserves anything simply for being nice.
You have some really messed up perceptions of social behaviors. Let me guess, you're socially awkward or even suffer from social anxiety?
Nope. Not at all
Then what's your excuse?
Excuse for what?
For your messed up perception of social behavior. Or maybe you have Asperger's? Clearly there's something off about the way you see things.
@Pamina
I have Aspergers and social anxiety and personally I think it's just because it's happened to him so many times when he is being "nice " he now thinks it's fact
@Lucky7Sins So you lied to me in your earlier comment, I see.
Just because i see things differently doesn't mean there's something wrong with me. Lol?
And nobody wants to date boring guys. Issa fact🤷♀️
I asked you if you have social anxiety, and you said no. So you lied.
And what this and your Asperger's mean, is that your perception of things is quite off. Which is painfully obvious in your post.
"killer4212" said that he didn't have social anxiety. "Lucky7Sins" said that he did. WHO LIED? You are pretty quick to be judgmental.
Whenever I ignore a woman she just doesn't respond back. I've never had it where a girl goes crazy and blows up my phone.
Also if you're an average guy doing what this guy said doesn't work. You have to approach girls left and right and hope that maybe one will have her head screwed on straight. After all, this is the kind of woman you want anyways.
correction, you have to have high cheek bones, a cleff chin, dimples, and a sixpack. thats all you need
Women these days don’t want commitment. Love is dead now. Just go MGTOW and do something positive for other people and for yourself. 90% of women today seriously needs to see a therapist.
Do you know how I know you're a loser?
Nice guys finish before we get started.
be a good guy not a nice guy, there's a big difference between them.
Nice guys dont know they should level up their standards and start to date the hot and the good women. But they seek for love in the quicksand.
Us guys can seek out "The hot & the good women" all we wish to,... that doesn't automatically mean The hot & the good women will think those nice guys will be their type. I know plenty of confident guys who have spoken to plenty of women, but those ladies have turn those confident guys down all because they are not their type.
@McKellar it is not a fixed theory tho and a hot & good woman is not necessarily a model but a woman who makes sense in general. After everything we can go through during our experiences in relationship, a genuinely good woman won't reject a good man
I'm sorry but according to my own witness & experiences,... I can't seem to agree with that.
TL;DR version people's conscious and subconscious don't always want the same things and those in denial of the power of their subconscious will not want what they say they want.