Confessions of a Ladies Man-She Pulls Away Because You’re Too Nice

[Apope16]

Ever have a girl who starts out as obsessed with you and after a few dates she messages you less and pulls away? Here is some advice I have in these situations.

The most common reason why women lose interest and pull away is because you are too nice. I know that sounds crazy but it’s true. You are too reliable. Too dependable. Too consistent. She knows that you like/love her. She feels secure about how much you care for her. In other words, you are boring. The mystery is gone. Women at some point in a relationship will take your kindness and love for granted.

You Must Unlock Your Inner Alpha

• 
  Be less available. No more good mornings or good nights. Text back at random. In early stages of dating pretty much ignore her unless you are scheduling dates.

Be mysterious. Be vague about your schedule. Change up your routine. Make her wonder if there is another girl to invoke jealousy. BUILD MYSTERY.

• 
  Be here dream come true. When she is not with you pull away and be confusing and distant. But when she is with you in person shock her with love, kindness, and passionate sex when you are with her. But when you are not with her give her more silence and distance. The contrast will make her realize the void of emptiness and miss you more.

[JackSmy]

@Apope16 Thank you, for your long explanation, and what you think.
I'm looking for a Lady, a Proper Lady, and she is TOTALLY my EQUAL, and I LOVE THAT!
But, she loves the Romance, and being "Swept Away" by a guy, and he cares, and knows, and it's all about the Romance, and LOVE, and those fantasy dreams, can be real!
So many women get tricked into shit, by guys, just lying to them, and telling them what they want to hear, and loving the promises, that become lies.
A real LADY, expects A GENTLEMAN, to respect her, and she is in EVERY WAY, and EQUAL, and I assume that!!
I want the Lady, that KNOWS she is an EQUAL, but ADORES being treated like a Lady, maybe a Princess, because he likes her, and wants to make her smile, and have the best time, ever, whatever they do, together!!

[Apope16]

Nobody is talking about lying here or treating her like she isn't equal.

What I am talking about is relationship foreplay. Taking it fast and taking it slow at the same time. Building mystery. Be that guy. She wants to not only be adored by you but she also wants to MISS YOU. Dont blow up her phone. stop the good morning and good night texting. make her wonder about you. Then when you are with her cherish her.

[JackSmy]

@Apope16 Your reply tells me that you don't have a FCKING CLUE!! You are about young enough to be the kid I never had, yet you think you can give me advice, how to attract women, and get a date?
Laughing so hard, I am almost crying!!!
You don't know me, and next to nothing about me. Thanks for your erroneous, little fantasies, of what you think women want, but you are just going about it, all WRONG!!
Come back, in 20 years, and having MAYBE had some accidental dates, and experiences with women, and maybe we can talk then! LOL!! :) Peace to you, young one. . .

[crazy8000]

Your talking about bending to her convenience.
Changing to become her wet ideological partner.
One sided.
That you aren't worth as much as her and must...

That doesn't create real attraction/emotions on the depth.
Only repels quality person.

[crazy8000]

You are talking about emotional damaged female's. with insecure relationship frame with shitty attitude involved.

Wouldn't recommend that kind of partner in the first place.
Move on and find someone that really has what it takes to be in a relationship instead of running after bottom scrapings ( crap ) .

[IDontBelieveIt]

agreed

[Apope16]

This is not about emotional damage. Stop acting like these ladies out there in the dating scene are innocent flowers. Grow up. Grow a pair. Understand the TRUTH about women.

The girl you just met and got her phone number? Yeah. SHe's talking to 5 to 12 other guys. Most likely she is having sex and getting rammed through 2 nights before she even met you bro. These are not innocent ladies out there in our new generation.

Second, I am teaching men tools here to beat ladies at their own game. Guys, understand. Women have been biologically and systematically learning these tricks for 1,000s of years. How to get a guy hooked and interested in them. Understand that. I am teaching men out there to use the tactics that women use on us to OUR advantange as men.

Lastly, did you ever realize women WANT this? Ladies out there are THIRSTY and LUSTING for you to do this to them. They are tired of these nice guys who tell them everything and after one date its clear they want to be their girlfriend. Women want FOREPLAY. they want mystery. they want tension. and build up. They want to chase.

Help these women out my brotha. give them what they want. Be THAT guy they want YOU to be. Bring out that inner alpha. that want to see that in you. trust me

[Ryfyle]

@Apope16 You might want to clarify the level of Mystery. I had a nasty habit of disappearing for a few days and showing up with a new scar.

[natured]

If my boyfriend wasn't nice and if he didn't do all the things you mentioned above, I would never be with him now after 7 years of relationship... So I'm really sorry but you're giving false information and you're teaching men to be plain IDIOTS.
It's just a fact, and I don't know whats up with the BAD BOY GOOD BOY thing lately, but I think you're watching too many movies.
I appreciate men that are good in the streets and bad in the sheets.Tks tks
-D-

[ChristianMan21]

Well said, haha. I think this advice he gave is really idiotic. I know way too many people who prove this to be false. Myself and my S/O as well.

[IveGotNoName]

My boyfriend does your weird "mysterious, unavailable, confusing" thing (not on purpose) when we are not together at times, and it is not nice. It honestly makes me like him less and want distance from him when he does. So you are sadly mistaken sir.

[Apope16]

Read the first to words you typed. It proves my point.🤣🤣🤣🤣

[IveGotNoName]

He only just started doing it dude.

[Apope16]

he's got you on the hook. He is a nice guy. he's not bad. But he's getting you obsessed. Curious. Thinking of you. You are still dating him. he's driving you crazy. You are frustrated. But you are falling deeper in love.

You boyfriend shows my advice is WORKING. frustrated? Yes. Will you dump him? Nope.

[IveGotNoName]

No. I talked to him about it like a normal person yesterday and expressed that I did not want him to keep doing that because it is off putting, and he should respect me more than to go cold and unavailable just because we aren't physically together when he does it. He understood and told me he'd work on it. I am not "on the hook", I am not "obsessed", and he is not "driving me crazy".

[Guy13]

The reality of the dating world is either you make and impression and lead both with vision, gentleness, and determination OR you can save the money and go home now.

[ChristianMan21]

Sorry, but this is literally the most idiotic thing I've ever heard... If you want to play around and not have something serious, then fine. Go ahead and mess with their emotions and "play a game" as you've said in the comments. You want something serious and real? Just be open and honest and forward about what you want with each other. I've dated a lot and messed around a lot, and the time I was messing around, I found that almost every girl has some sort of emotional baggage because of a guy with this sort of moronic mentality that you need to "beat them at their own game" as if you aren't on the same side anyway! You want a partner in life? Stop pretending you're against each other! So stupid... Guys, don't listen to this moron... Be yourself, be open and honest, and show her the respect and love she deserves. If she is one of the FEW women who wants to play, then she probably isn't for you. Take it from me, I've had several healthy relationships, and NONE of them were using this nonsense. And the only reason I ever broke up with someone or they broke up with me is because we had different goals and directions in life. THAT should be how a relationship goes. Trust. Honesty. Openness. Sharing life with each other. Not hiding anything or playing some twisted game...

[Azura_88]

Exactly. I broke up the moment I saw him being unavailable and mysterious because lockdown happened. I was regretting that why the hell did I used to agree to hang out everyday. I was furious that he will literally beg me to hang out but when physical distance happened, he emotionally distanced himself too. I just broke up after giving few chances. I'm glad that I don't stick around with people like these.

[ChristianMan21]

Exactly. Every stupid piece of advice he gave here is manipulative and toxic... I seriously hope that nobody actually believes him.

[Azura_88]

Manipulative people will take his advice

[ChristianMan21]

Well that may be, but I'm just hoping that good people who are feeling desperate don't take this seriously.

[Azura_88]

TRUEE OR good people feeling insecure as in fear of abandonment so they'll follow this to secure a girl

[ChristianMan21]

Exactly. There was a point in my life where I was feeling very desperate, and I was definitely actively looking for advice online, and had I found this, I might have tried it. I mainly ended up just talking to hundreds of girls trying to find someone that I clicked with. I just experimented to see what worked best and what made both of us feel good. At this point, I know that all of what this guy is saying is a bunch of garbage.

[Azura_88]

So your method worked out?

[ChristianMan21]

Well yes, but it took some trial and error and also a lot of self improvement and development. The way I put it sounds kind of bad, so let me be a little more specific. After a lot of experience, I finally came to the conclusion that if you treat it like a game and you try to "beat them at their own game" and that sort of thing, you WILL fail. It isn't a game, it's actual people and actual emotions and desires (including yourself). I just learned that I had to be myself, but also be kind, understanding, patient, loving, proactive, etc. Anything you view as good, be that yourself and you'll attract someone who is meant for you. My relationship right now is so strong and good, I wasn't sure I'd ever have this. I also gained a LOT of confidence because of my experience. It started out that I failed so much that I just became numb to failure so I didn't seem insecure anymore. However, because of that, people started liking being around me more and that gave me confidence and then positivity. I know my journey is a crazy one with lots of weird convoluted turns, but it got me here, so I'm very thankful for every twist and turn.

[Azura_88]

That's really nice to hear that you became the person you wanted to be with and actually ended up attracting the right person. But in most cases and in my experience I've exactly become loyal, honest, emotional and caring but have always attracted narcissists and liars. So I'm very scared to show my real self in real life.

[ChristianMan21]

Thank you. And I'm really sorry to hear that... I think that unfortunately, that's a common problem. The only advice I can give there is that if you have a common goal that requires you to have the traits you want, then it becomes easier. In this particular case, the only thing that I can think of (and what worked for me in a way) is Christianity. The Bible has guidelines for how we treat everyone, and I've met many people both male and female that have those good traits. Nobody is perfect and there are still some bad people even in a Christian setting, but I think picking good people also comes with a lot of experience. Perhaps try looking in the church? In my search, the best groups are the church of Christ and the conservatative Christian church. They follow the Bible closer than any other group and have people who are very serious and devoted people. Almost every marriage in those groups lasts for life. It's actually quite impressive.

[Azura_88]

Wow thank you. I do admire Chistians or anyone who's devoted and have good morals, values, etc. Many guys in my area keep on comparing girls by looks, body, status and they used to hit on me, they literally said "you've raised our standards more so we can't fall for a girl who is less pretty than you ". I felt very annoyed, depressed and was convinced that pure love doesn't exist. These kinda guys just check out hot women on social media. Thanks for your advice, I'll look for devoted men now.

[Azura_88]

In my country we have different religions so I'll be with a guy who can respect them even if he doesn't totally believe in them.

[ChristianMan21]

You're very welcome, and I sincerely hope you find someone who is mature and kind and compassionate. If you don't mind me asking, what country are you from?

[Azura_88]

India

[ChristianMan21]

Ahh okay, I see. So I'm guessing the main religious groups in your area are probably Hinduism and maybe Buddhism? I do know that there are some churches of Christ in India though, so you could probably still find them if you wanted to.

[Azura_88]

Yes I've been there, I was excited to see their culture as well. But there is a huge conflict of religion within the families itself in my country. I'm a high caste Hindu so my parents want a high caste Hindu but I'm not gonna listen to them... but in other families also Muslim or Christian also wants the same. So my guy will also be willing to put love above everything and we both will respect our different religions.

[ChristianMan21]

Yeah, I understand. The caste system over there is definitely a difficult thing to work with. I will say be careful in trying to be with someone from a different religion than you. Especially if you plan on raising kids. Children need continuity in all things from their parents. I really hope everything works out well for you!

[Azura_88]

Thanks... I'm interested in childless marriage. I MIGHT adopt if I rarely change my mind. This makes it more difficult for me as many people only make the kids the centre of their marriage, world and entire thing.

[JustAnj]

No that's not why... this is all bad any girl that says this is true is more than likely needs to work on some things herself but no one is perfect.

Look, I knew a guy who was a year younger then me really sweet really nice and I told him I decided I was not interested in him. He did not get why woman said he was to nice. I tried to explain to him my reasons, one he was to young what I meant was he was too inexperienced as in he was nice but I felt like knowing more about him over knowing how nice can be towards me. The inexperienced part has to do with a lot of immaturity which means I would have to be his learning about life and relationship girl. I just wanted to be with someone who understood what they wanted and wanted something serious. It's hard to believe this person can be serious if they do not understand that at some point the innocent of a relationship will disappear and that's okay.

It's really hard to explain but over with my experience I did not want to have to teach him anything or have to go through another break up because he forgot to get to know who he was before getting involved. Growth is a big deal for some of us. We know you got flaws we do too but if you don't know how to handle yourself in a relationship it's gonna be a problem. Some of us girl are ready to commit not be your experience and lesson. So go love you and learn about yourself so you can be ready too. ❤️

[Bl0n6eguy]

If this is the case, how will any of us yet to find someone be accepted into a relationship?

Men who are too nice are a product of what we have been told to be, by both modern society and the media; if lacking in confidence, standing and assertiveness is an issue, why are we told to avoid being a confident, forward or assertive?

[JustAnj]

@BI0n6eguy Who tells you this? If you are learning from Media then your on a bad influence, someone had put it simply as in being to nice is not about being nice. It's about how your not including you as a person with flaws. The point is not to not be yourself but to fully show who you are with insecurities and all but to understand that not everyone is going to be on the same page with you. You are not meant to be with every person you are meant to find a person who will love you for you. But you being nice is not YOU that's just a portion of how you act.

What I am saying is that I had been with a guy before this nice guy and went through hell because he was nice then was confused about what he wanted. He started realizing he wanted to find himself and who he was... he was not ready for a partnership this was fusterating. Please do not focus only on being with someone just so your not lonely or single. The right person will come and many will be examples but if you don't even know yourself what do you have to give and offer someone else? Some women are willing to be patient and let you grow and figure it out while together but we all change so it's a hit in miss situation. Whatever you want to do is up to you.

I'm guessing this is why people date to figure it out. I just never had time for games when I knew what I wanted and who I was.

There are plenty of women in your same boat so I am not the only type of girl that exists. You will find someone.

[BoredGuy12345]

Unlike my reply, yours really resonates. I agree, self awareness is very important. Gotta know who you are and what u want in a relationship.

[RockinRob10123]

I don't even get started and they back away. I am nice! But I like rough bars. So the biker babes look but don't touch. I ain't making a first move because I don't know who is with who. I went to other bars too. Not so rough but you still didn't want to mess with anyone. Every once in a while I'd find a woman who liked my style. Too many and too long a time to end up alone. I lived with too many from a couple weeks to about four years. Her and I still see each other. Just to say high. And I gave guys a few try's. Who knew I would love sucking and swallowing. I'm new here and don't want to reveal too much of my past. No violence. I despise women and children abusers and bruisers. If you can't hold your partners arms to keep him or her from beating on you don't piss'em off. Women and children were created to keep man company. A lot of my friends think I go into too much detail but I like to explain what I'm talking about so there is no question what I said and how I feel. I don't lie and I am very trustworthy where I don't think someone is lying unless I know the truth. I've said enough.

[far2gud4u]

Sorry pal but you are so off the mark here it's crazy. These are what your issues are:

1) Some girls don't want to tie down yet and enjoy serial dating where they can get the ego boost they need with a variety of guys. I think this is a bit crap of these girls but I see it happen.

2) They liked you but were unsure on date 1, date 2 they thought they couldn't judge you after the first one so give it another blast. Date 3 is still as bad so it's adios.

3) You just are not what the girl is looking for. Usually this is the wrong choice in partner to begin with rather than a person sleight against anyone.

You are looking into this way too much. You will find girls that appreciate a nice guy and you will find those that are drawn to the bad ones... Just enjoy dating and don't look to marry every single girl who comes your way!

[Kaamraj]

This article is correct. Attraction cannot be negotiated nor is it moral or fair. Women are hypergamous by nature, being sexually attracted to men with a higher sexual mean value (SMV). And in any negotiation, the side which can walk away holds more power. "Nice Guys" who go the "extra mile" to please a woman unconsciously show their lower SMV in relation to her, and this turns women off. So, the so-called nice guys should devote more energy towards themselves and self-improvement. When their value and experience will increase, they will rationalize their treatment towards women.

[Babewithplan]

When women hit a certain age, we want the nice guy.

[Azura_88]

The moment I see a guy who wants to date me is mysterious or unavailable I'm INSTANTLY OUT!
I hate shady people, zero tolerance for BS.
You are not a ladies man, you're a simp because you're still trying hard to keep a lady with you one way or the other. You're trying to COPY alpha attitude but it clearly shows you're equally desperate to keep ladies hooked.

[Azura_88]

Confusing and distant? My foot. One guy tried that with me and ended up getting ghosted by me.

[Azura_88]

"The contrast will make her realize void of emptiness". If partners make you feel empty then why the fuck do i need them? They're OUT. I don't need this toxic drama. I'll literally label them as perverts if they are distant online but offer so much when physically available.

[Azura_88]

In fact that contrast will push me to be happy with OTHER THINGS... I'll instantly start looking for other things that won't let me down like he did. If my partner makes me feel lonely but then suddenly love bombs me then he is a narcissist.

[ChristianMan21]

Haha, I love this comment! Totally called him out! 😂 I think what you said is spot on, too. Alpha guys are the ones who actually care and aren't afraid to show how they feel. Alpha guys are the ones who don't need manipulative tactics to keep a woman. My S/O had two ex boyfriends like this. They made her feel like she wasn't good enough and they were selfish and manipulative. Now that she's with me, she feels truly safe and secure and loved. She starts missing me and texting me a lot whenever I'm not there. Is it because I am manipulative or distant? No! I simply treat her very well with love and respect. You don't have to be boring. I surprise her sometimes with various things and keep my affection unpredictable, but at least it's always there. I'm not trying to toot my own horn or anything, but I believe that I am a true alpha male. Why? Because I don't feel the need to fake anything... I am extremely confident in myself and the love I give to her. THAT is how you keep someone in a serious relationship.

[Azura_88]

@ChristianMan21 bravo!!!

[Azura_88]

Yes we can't be present for our partners sometimes but at least your affections are still there. That's what matters. Not like purposely making her feel empty. This Apope fake alpha is cringe.

[ChristianMan21]

Thank you, lol. And exactly. Causing negative emotions for your S/O intentionally is sick and manipulative. This guy claims to be a ladies man, but he obviously knows nothing about actual relationships and commitment.

[Azura_88]

@ChristianMan21 he's bluffing or simply surrounded by toxic women who love drama.

[Toast792]

They probably 'lose interest' because you won't shut up about how 'alpha' you are. You look like a kid who has read one too many wattpad fics.. 😂😂 To all the guys who are reading this, please don't listen to this small child. You'll probably just end up attracting sluts who only stick around for your money..

[iseekpinetrees]

Lol I'll agree to this one. But your line you should of written was... be a bit of an asshole. Simply put. Not gunna lie my hubby was the nice guy turned little assholey n I ended up liking him more. So it's damn true. But I do like when people actually show personality and most of us talk shit so most of us have an asshole side. I'd rather someone show their nice and asshole side because no one is perfect and if they act perfect they are probably being fake.

[yulbsari]

Yes! BINGO! It took me too long to realize this!

[TommyMountainFigure]

You left out one small detail. If you do either one as an act, she will see right through you.
1) Try and be nice and always available if you're not that kind of person. She'll know.

2) Try and be unavailable and treat her sometimes with contempt if that's not really you? Again, she will know

The bottom line is, always be yourself and as long as you find the right person for you, You'll both be happy! And without ever having to hide who you really are.

[Babewithplan]

Bingo

[Apope16]

Search the word contempt in this note. You won't find it. Show anywhere in the note where it says treat women badly. You won't find it. The advice is be less available etc.

[Babewithplan]

@Apope16 You’re so gay teaching men to be women.

[TiaraGlitzNeon]

@Babewithplan Or you're just a man pretending to be a woman so you can make it look like more women agree with this bullshit post.

[TiaraGlitzNeon]

It's quite sad that a lot of guys actually think this bullshit is true, and it concerns me. I guess I don't know about other women, but me personally, I don't put up with this shit. This is off putting and would end up making me more irritated and feel like the guy I'm dating actually doesn't want me at all by ghosting me all the time, or like he's hiding something. I can't stand that kind of behavior. I don't want a clingy guy, but I want someone who cares enough to give me their time and attention if they truly like me and are interested in me. Guys often times think that they were rejected cause they were "too nice" when in reality they were being clingy, the woman wasn't interested in the first place, or they were just being creeps. I don't date assholes. Never will. Instant deal breaker.

[MysteriousDarkness]

Your advice is when not physically with her is to be distant, not to contact her, make her think you don't want her you, make her think you are cheating on her etc. When you are with her to flood her with love, romance, intimacy etc to the point you come across as clingy. In other words when apart be cold hearted and when physically together be an immature boy who cannot control his horniness and sees her as a sexual object and nothing more.
A self respecting woman will not want anything to do with somone who is like that.
Once again you failed even though you claim to know everything about wo. en to the point you claim to know what all women are going to say and or do before they know what they are going to say and or do. You failed even though you claim to know how to attract women when in reality you only get girls at best.

[ifbaldrickwasagirl]

Um... I like nice guys!
Ngl, I would hate to be in a hot-and-cold relationship with an "alpha" type. I hate it when emotions are hidden and opportunities lost, just because a guy was too "manly" to show his true feelings!
I don't want them to be needy/desperate or trying to mould themselves to my liking, but at the same time a man who puts on the alpha I'm-an-asshole-and-enjoying-it mask would be repulsive to me.

[ChristianMan21]

This guy is an idiot... He claims to be a ladies man, but knows nothing about actual connections, relationships, and commitment. An actual alpha male is someone who is confident in themselves - confident enough to not play childish games to get what they want. A real man doesn't hide things from his significant other, but is open and honest and caring. The true nature of man is to be a protector and provider. To provide every kind of safety, respect, love, and protection is our true instinct. Most men nowadays have been brought up to believe otherwise, but those who don't show those traits are not men. They're children. A real man is going to be confident, emotionally available, caring, calm, and attentive to the ones they love. Not whatever this garbage is, lol.

[Pandupillu]

Yes, it's true. Younger women love the roller coaster type of guy. Unpredictable, who is assertive. Who isn't nice all the time, but only when the situation demands it. Who is ambitious, stands his ground. Who does not put up with all the wishes and fancies. Who keeps himself busy, but gives time to her as well. Who leads.
However women will want a guy to be less assertive, more consistent "nice guy" when they want to get married. The preferences change as she matures more. I was in a relationship with "too nice guy". I was 19 then. He was lovely no doubt. But somewhere that spark was lacking. He was kind of submissive. And I couldn't take it or be physically attracted to him. I feel bad saying this, but I left the relationship. There has to be a balance of feminine and masculine. In a man it should be 70/30. 70 percent masculine and 30 percent feminine. I love a man to be slightly dominating. Assertive, and sensitive when the situation demands it.

[CookiesAndCream2]

Sluts, like the ones you "date" and why you can't hold down a decent relationship, wouldn't care.

Most decent women would rightfully think your cheating by such childish behaviour and toss you to the curb.

[Nobefore]

Isn't this lying? That's can't be sustainable in long term. I think everyone just needs to be themselves. If she doesn't like you cus who you are then she is not right for you. For example, my friend has a boyfriend who calls or texts her every minute. And she likes him for that. She likes his attention. I prefer a person-to-person conversation. We are not bad but we are different, so the trick is here is just try to be yourself for the right person. That's all.

[Ice_knight]

Immature and childish women want those types of men. Mature, grown and settled women seek secure and settled men who are nice and will be there for them. Most men who meet the criteria you have set out here are abusers and no good for the women they are with. I'm sorry dude but this isn't it at all. Now some relationships can get dull and boring, but there are better ways of spicing the relationship up.

[Robertcw]

Ain't it sad that youth has more sexual fertility. Makes no sense. Almost like we evolved to reproduce immaturely.

[Ayanna240]

How hilarious, a man who cannot maintain a relationship , teaching other people how to maintain a relationship. How many more relationships have you been on this past month?

[Anonymous]

I mean if this works for you then good. But I honest just don’t see this working on healthy mature women. Those women are attracted to the cheeky playful as well as serious kinds of men who can keep her on her toes and interact with him in a more feminine way because he’s more masculine through his caring but cheeky personality.

[tupacs_only_wife]

Keep up that aloof alpha shit and that's how you'll die lonely. If only you men knew how women hate that toxic alpha sigma bs, like bruv just live a normal life find a serious woman who truly loves you and is willing to be around you no matter what.

[HiveBee]

Yea but if you can't get a date you have to change yourself right? You can't just assume you are perfect. One must work on thenselves.

Why not do what it takes to make the most amount of women attracted to you?

[JustAnj]

@HiveBee You don't have to change yourself you just need to grow some and learn more about self love and your needs. Working on yourself is not about being a people pleaser it's about understand where your flaws lay and working on them to be prepared for a partner that you feel is right for you as they should feel you are for them. Never change who you are to please learn to change through growth and wanting to be a knowledgeable better you.

[HiveBee]

@JustAnj Maybe. I dont know. It doesn't apply to me because I've always been improving myself.

But it never got me a girl. But now, I've been having much success with women and none of it was because i improved myself.

Most of it was by accident honestly. I said something mean by accident one time and suddenly i was famous with the girls.

And so for the past few years I've been trying to figure out why women react to different men the way they do.

Most dudes aren't even like on that journey of continuois self improvement. Most guys i see who have all the options are bum ass losers.

Like its just hard to believe that self improvement plays any role at all.

Rather, it seems like learning ti play "the game" actually gets you results. And you can easily discover what you want when you have a large pool of women to choose from.

Like, us men dont have the option to just date around 100 girls, find out what will make my perfect wife and find her.

No most guys take what they can get it seems to me lol. Maybe im wrong.

[JustAnj]

Honestly it depends on what your looking for, you want girls you will get GIRLS not women. I can tell you why a girl would perceive being mean with respect because that is what is happening to you. A lot of girls are inexperienced themselves in what a healthy relationship is and being with someone who meets them. A guy with I don't give a shit attitude speaks volumes to girls just learning about life themselves and there is many. A guy who is respectable though is a man who knows what he wants and does not have to be aggressive but also knows how to be stern if necessary about himself as well understand to agree to disagree and respect others, this marks maturity.

I don't know how old you are but working on yourself is not necessarily for your partner but for you, your partner just gets to reep the benefits of a better you and you with them.

Growth is forever so don't be to clingy about it but what can be different is maturity and self love.

It's pretty easy to get a girl who doesn't know what she wants if your up to it why not grow together but if your looking to be with someone ready you gotta be ready to. Overall though good luck!!! I do love them couple stories fun or romantic. 😁

[JustAnj]

@HiveBee ^^^

[HiveBee]

Im on this site for a purpose.

I grew up alone. No friends. Abusive family. Couldnt even talk to a girl, even if the girl approached me!

I was terrified of women. Im really only here on this site, so i can figure out what changes i made that caused me to become popular with the ladies.

ALL the ladies. Young to old. Like 90s and shit lol. There is no difference. One day, things were one way, and maybe a few years later it all clicked and suddenly, all women treat me differently.

Women love me now. Its an energy. Its a vibe. Its something...

And that something i feel, is what men need, if only i could pass it on to the next guy and help him escape a hellish experience like i did with girls.

But i dont even understand it myself. Sure things are different and women treat me very differently in a very good way.

I just dont get why. Like wtf happened lol. It all sparked wirh girls going bananas on me for being mean one time.

But after that its just a mess of a story and im here at the end of it like "wtf happened?"

[HiveBee]

So im really just trying to figure out what happened and why. And how can i pass that on to other dudes who have struggled with women like i did.

[JustAnj]

I get it but it's not the best idea especially when you get older and not all girls stay girls.

That can get lonely, my guy was abused to and now he is married to me with kids and he just got to working on himself. Guys should not slow themselves down to being good themselves just for girls.

I live my husband to pieces but he definitely has a lot of growing to do.

You really want to know ask the girls you end up with why they like you or girls that are attracted to you maybe then you will get an answer or it will be a I don't know which probably is not a good sign. 🤷

[tupacs_only_wife]

@HiveBee you should know that changing yourself is not necessary to attract women. Actually a lot of women who know exactly what they want would get attracted to a guy because they find his character attractive. Just be yourself and the right girl will come by, the ones who are flocking around will leave sooner or later. Im saying this because it reminds me of my boyfriend. he loves loves anime, mostly pokemon and at the end of the day i still adore him because of his personality and the calmness he brings to me. My aunt also married a super geek and yet they are still together for over 11 years now. That is because he is himself and that is what my aunt fell for. Just be you and a girl who admires you will come by and the advantage is, you don't have to be all masculine around her because nearly all women know just how toxic masculinity can be and we all want to end it.