A PSA to Women: Don't Confuse your Sexual Value for your Relationship Value!

[Anonymous]

A lot of younger, inexperienced women need to realize: your sexual market value isn't your relationship value.

Note: if you already know this or are in a relationship, this doesn't apply to you. This mytake was inspired by talking to a more sheltered younger girl who was LOVING all the hookup attention she was getting on Bumble, but was shocked when I cautioned her that her "I'd hookup with her" pool of men would not be the same as her "I'd go on a date with her" pool of men.

What does this mean? Well, you get on Tinder or Bumble and put "looking for casual" or nothing at all--you will almost guaranteed to get near unlimited likes.

The truth is, most women have an unlimited supply of casual sex partners if they live in a big city. It's reality--a decently attractive woman who says looking for casual will have unlimited likes. Granted, only a percentage of these likes will be attractive to them, and human nature also says that when you have near unlimited of something, the value plummets.

The important part: guys will bang women they would never actually date. Why is this important? Two fold.

1. Don't get too arrogant.

When one has something in unlimited supply, it's nature to get pickier about it. Many women start thinking because they have unlimited supply of casual sex partners, that they can be very demanding or expect actual relationship interest from top tier men, or "only 6' need apply" or whatever. Women need to be aware: just because a guy will hook up with you does not at all mean he would date you. Maybe a 6'2 lawyer will be your friends with benefits. That doesn't mean that if you keep trying, you'll be going home to meet the parents of a 6'2 lawyer.

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What does this mean? You might be have hooked up with a really hot guy on tinder last week, 6' and great salary and nice place. This does not at all mean he'd be interested in dating you. You need to realize when you are shopping out of your price range, or else five hot friends with benefits's and multiple heart breaks later you're going to wonder "why will no guys commit?" The simple lesson? Your hookup pool is not the same as your dating pool. Your hookup pool, if you are decently attractive, will be huge. Your pool of guys who would actually take you on dates, be texting you and asking how your day went, get to know you, and want to have a relationship with you? It is almost guaranteed to be a lot smaller than your hookup pool.

2. Realize where you are setting your expectations and tastes.

Everyone should date or be in a relationship with people they are attracted too. Here's the rub though. Women can hookup with much hotter guys than they can actually date--and like anyone else, we all love to get the maximum we can.

"But, why is this worth saying? What's your point?"

The point is this: let's say you are looking for fun hookups, filter carefully, and get the best hookups you possibly could, the hottest sex, the wildest nights that leave you exhausted. That's your right to do so if you want, absolutely. It's sort of like me renting a Corvette vs me actually affording to buy one.

However when you swing back down to your dating pool, guys have a lot stricter standards for who they will seriously date and invest in vs who will bang every other weekend. You might find that your tastes have adjusted and now the guys who will actually call you back after a first date are very unattractive to you, in comparison to the guys who are glad to call you over for a bang and then send you home so they can relax and watch a movie by themselves.

In which case... you're either;

1. Going to have to try to self improve so the guys you're attracted to would actually go on a date with you vs a quick bang.

2. Be happy just being a quick bang.

3. Deal with going on dates with guys you're literally not attracted to and don't want to be with.

4. Be alone.

[ManOnFire]

Interesting Take. I've heard a zillion guys repeat these things but I think maybe you added something a little different to the program. I have a female friend who hooks up with a guy who doesn't ever care about her as a person and doesn't want to wife her either. Outside of her I know other women who are the same.

It's true that an alarmingly large amount of these types of women want - or expect - to be relationship material but ultimately they can't give up their hook up lifestyles. And the reason why is because in this modern age, women are very in love with being sexually desirable. I often wonder if they love that more than actual healthy, loving relationships. They enjoy that many men pursue and glorify them and put them on a sexual pedestal, even if these women complain about it. Deep down I think they get drunk off of this glory. They also enjoy that there are a lot of guys who feel jealous or who aren’t having sex like they are, or as much sex. And they take pride in feeling that they can sleep with whoever they want whenever they want. This is really what it all comes down to.

So I think because of it, it's why you have such a staggering number of women who are just plain stuck up, self-absorbed, and loving attention more than anything. Unlimited supply or not, even if the value is low, they still enjoy the high of it because they're being chased, glorified, and validated.

[Investigator]

"women are very in love with being sexually desirable"

In other words, modern women are in love with the idea of being wanted more than the idea of having someone actually want them. It's not enough that someone wants them, if not everyone wants them. Kind of like how in business you can make some of the money, but why would you want that when you can make ALL OF THE MONEY?

I'm not religious, but isn't this the value proposition for "believing in God", i. e. being in the care of a being of INFINITE warmth and compassion? We're an anti-religious society, that believes it is above the petty use case for faith, and yet, at every turn, it keeps circling back around to the reasons people are religious. It's almost like we're finite beings, trying to find within other finite beings, an infinitude of love for us. Maybe it's just me, but the similarities are a bit too striking and noticeable to miss.

[ManOnFire]

@Investigator I'm struggling to understand how religion would be similar to women's ego. I don't fully get what you mean.

[Investigator]

You misunderstand. When I say "isn't this the value proposition for 'believing in God'", what I mean is "what matters more, the love and validation of one person or everyone ever?" For a lot of women, one man's love in nice, but it's not "all the attention and admiration that can be had", now, is it?

At some point, there comes a time when "more" no longer suffices. Presently, our culture has still not reached the point of realizing "all of humanity's combined admiration" is inadequate, probably because we understand numbers and metrics, and we can quantify them. We only feel good about ourselves when they go up, and in that way, our social media-addled zeitgeist is like a drug addict: we know that endless validation is not good for us, but we've been addicted for so long, that we don't know how to quit or even know if we want to. Women have this worse than men; men are valuable for what they do, but women are valuable because of who they are, so they suffer from this addiction more internally and it hits harder.

If women are in love with being desired, then there can never be enough men wanting them. There is no such thing as "too much", only "not enough". If all the love and admiration in the world is insufficient, where do you go from there?

[ManOnFire]

@Investigator Ahhhhh, I see now. Yes, that makes a lot of sense. It could also be due to the fact that women are also often emptier than men, which is why they seek external things, people, etc. to fill them up, and is also why they can never be satisfied and why they lose interest in things so much quicker than men. They don't know how to fill their own inner void.

[waffles4andsyrup]

@ManOnFire "And they take pride in feeling that they can sleep with whoever they want whenever they want. This is really what it all comes down to."

And then they become post wall bitches that can't figure out where all the good men are lol.

[waffles4andsyrup]

@Investigator "social media-addled zeitgeist is like a drug addict: we know that endless validation is not good for us, but we've been addicted for so long, that we don't know how to quit or even know if we want to"

I have. I quit all that bullshit. It was taking up too much of my time. And I didn't get anything useful out of it.

[HighValue]

I would add three things.
1. People's past matters. Once someone has been promiscuous/done hook ups/ONS/friends with benefits, they are forever unsuitable for a relationship with a lot of the good guys they hope to have one day.
2. The kind of men that do hook ups will continue to lead that kind of lifestyle. That has to do with their morals, so even if they try to change, they will still be easily tempted and are unlikely to stay faithful long term.
3. Just because someone is attractive and has many options, that doesn't mean they are an immoral cheater or hook up kind of person. Some people are only interested in an exclusive LTR, even when they do have many options.

You do have some good valid points in the MyTake though.

[Shamalien]

A girl who has hooked up in her younger years, had a spiritual epiphany and stopped and wants to change I would give a chance. Someone who continues that behaviour into their mid 20s and then wants serious around 30 is really not worth it for any man though in my opinion

[Xoxocutekitty]

A woman can be a perfect 10; earn a decent wage, great figure, good family, loyal, kind, can cook while also hanging with the boys.

If a man is not in the right mindset, he will never date or commit to her, her friends, or even the hottest girl in school. He'll hook up with her, use her, chase the next hottest or hard to get thing because it interests him, while being in a relationship doesn't.

Remember ladies, someones inability to see your worth, does not determine your value. Don't sit around waiting around for one guy to notice you, to commit to you. According to this user, he thinks many men will say whatever they can to laid because thats more important than your morals/feelings.

Just be you and the right man will know what he has. Any guy that puts you in lesser a box without giving you the option to walk isn't worth your time.

[myTake Owner]

Oh a good amount of men will absolutely say whatever they think will help them bang a girl. I don't think that's in the mytake but it's absolutely true.

However the main point of this mytake is simple. Your pool of potential hookups is not the same as your pool of potential relationships.

[Xoxocutekitty]

I acknowedge that this mindset exists. I also acknowledge that I too can sort men into two arbitrarily limiting buckets. Men worthy to date, and men who I'll use for free food and drinks.

I've never intentionally used a guy for free stuff without his consent though because it just seems wrong. Men deserve better. Do you get my drift?

[MrtoddsWildRide]

If you want to find a man that sees your worth, do a deep dive into your freindzone.

[ChiTown33]

It's not really a "mindset" most guys don't commit to a relationship simply because the woman has given him no reason to. It has to be worth his while. Just being a woman and relatively attractive doesn't cut it.

[SweetFyter]

OK, yes, I'm young. But this entire MyTake was hard to read - it was almost like guys ONLY want sex. But, then I read this from @Xoxocutekittyz = "Remember ladies, someones inability to see your worth, does not determine your value... Just be you and the right man will know what he has. Any guy that puts you in lesser a box without giving you the option to walk isn't worth your time." YES!

I was beginning to think I was the only person who thought that was true. THANK YOU for posting this opinion!

[MrtoddsWildRide]

@SweetFyter
If you want something hard to read then read the studies showing that the original post was correct. YOU ARE OVERVALUING YOURSELF AND UNDERVALUING MEN. It's not that hard. Figure it out. Have some humility. Sonuvabitch. It is shown by study after study after study and they all say the same thing. Get out of denial.
I'm sorry to be so blunt. I really am, but sometimes you can only drive in a nail with a hammer.

[VanillaSalt]

@SweetFyter um sweet I hate to tell you think but your value will only ever be what others think of you… as long as humans are social your only value is what you contribute:

[bamesjond0069]

"He'll hook up with her, use her, chase the next" it takes two to hookup. If she didn't want to be treated this way she could have not had sex. See @MzAsh comment above.

[SweetFyter]

@MrtoddsWildRide I don't think I said anything about undervaluing men. To be honest, I'm not really understanding what you were so angry about. Sorry.

@VanillaSalt Well, it's clear that a lot of people think like you do - I understand that. But I will NEVER base my value of myself on someone else's opinion. NO one should! But, I will admit that the opinions of others CAN have an effect. Sure, that's human nature. But I believe that anyone who bases THEIR self-worth on the opinions of others will have a miserable and disappointing life.

[VanillaSalt]

And from experience I argue that anyone that is considered low value by people and society will have an equally miserable and disappointing life.

[Gidge]

@MrtoddsWildRide I wouldn't date someone I hadn't been friends with for a while lmao.

[Vegasrunner]

@Xoxocutekitty You actually highlight a very good point that more guys need to understand. There are double standards on both sides the difference is the majority of the ones that benefit women are seen as socially and in many cases morally acceptable. The ones that benefit guys not so much.

[Vegasrunner]

@Xoxocutekitty If a woman truly does everything right she can keep a good man the problem is advice like this actually stunts womens learning curve

[Gangactivities911]

I disagree I only hookup with women BECAUSE the women I’d commit to won’t give me attention. If I found the right girl I’d 100% commit to them and I’m waaaay less likely to commit as I get older.

[hahahmm]

@MrtoddsWildRide If you wait in the friendzone for a woman you're setting yourself up to be a Will Smith cuck type who never gets respect cause the woman knows you don't respect yourself (much). Just how it is.

[BraveRiver]

Women control sex, it’s your power and on your terms. Men control relationships, it’s on our terms.

There’s a lot of mutual that goes into it, but in the end men aren’t waiting on a ring.

[waffles4andsyrup]

@Xoxocutekitty "If a man is not in the right mindset, he will never date or commit to her"

This is it exactly. But some women want to try and force a man into changing to commit to her. That won't ever happen. It will just lead to a messy entanglement that neither the man or woman will enjoy. And they'll end up bitter all the while not realizing its their own actions that lead to the outcome they're in. Use some modicum of control ladies. Because otherwise you'll end up being another post wall cat lady.

[waffles4andsyrup]

@Xoxocutekitty "and men who I'll use for free food and drinks.

I've never intentionally used a guy for free stuff without his consent though because it just seems wrong. Men deserve better. Do you get my drift?"

You just contradicted yourself. And its proof that women say one thing an do another.

[PhenomenalQueen]

I actually realize, understand, and acknowledge this… Why? Because I’ve watched enough dating coaches, had two experiences, and I’ve also watched my friends fail over and over and over again… This is literally our lives in a nutshell.. I was talking about this yesterday on TikTok. So, we’re dating out of our league, or trying to date people who would normally never walk up to us because they know we’re way too low for them. It’s a hard reality to accept, but it makes perfect sense… “ugly” people date “ugly” people, average people date average, and hot/pretty/attractive people date their own level… But social media allows some of those top dogs to prey on the less attractive women and it goes to our heads.

[myTake Owner]

Yay! Thank you for your thorough answer, I appreciate it. And thanks for not taking this mytake as an insult, I think it's something women need to know to help them make educated choices.

[PhenomenalQueen]

I hope someone else is able to accept it, because it’s very hard to accept the truth for some people.. Thank you for posting this.

[ProveSolution]

now apply truth seeking to every aspect of your life and see how it changes.
don't go too deep. acknowledge and live life to its fullest.

[PhenomenalQueen]

Yes that I plan on doing. Lol

[Guy13]

Body counting and friends with benefits lifestyles NEVER lead to a successful long-term relationship.

[NoUsernameSelected]

I don't know why this is such a big surprise anymore tbh.
But I also don't know what you are trying to achieve with this post?

The simple truth is, destroying the nuclear family and the monogamous relationships made the "richest" men (in terms of affection and desirability) even richer hypergamy is running rampant. Now that the cat is out of the bag, there is no turning back unless you have a civil war or something that creates a new constitution. Such event would probably be followed by the 3rd world war and who knows what would happen.

So better avoid that at all costs.

But what to do about the millions of young single men? We will reach a dangerous amount of Gen Z guys - who are probably the generation that was taught to be the most liberal - who will realize: They won't have a girlfriend, they won't have sex, they won't have a house, they won't have a family and their parasocial relationship with that Onlyfans girl is not real? Everyone will blame them for everything but if shit hits the fan they are supposed to sacrifice themselves for the society that disrespected and blamed them - liberals and conservatives will attack them together. The amount of bitterness will be palpable and felt one way or the other.

It will be a difficult task to wake up all the "nice guys" and male feminist before they do it themselves and drift into incel culture or the black pill and go the wrong way and blame women for all their ill. Nobody wants that - that's like blaming the sun its brightness. And to anyone reading this, if you see a Gen Z guy say they heard that personality is the most important thing for girls, wake him up and straight up tell him that he is absolutely wrong and should start to work on his appearance. Gen Z girls it would be nice if you were a bit more honest, at least when you are anonymous online (no need to virtue signal) and tell men straight up that you would rather date a hottie pro Trump guy that some below average (80% of men) loser.

[ProveSolution]

yes. i want to add: i like to improve myself and i would expect my girlfriend to be capable of insight and change.
also i have set up certain standards to be fulfilled in order to be wife material. nothing unrealistic. just not common in modern women. this article focused on bitches. nothing against a slut (a woman who bangs many men; which is easy), but this is someone who potentially betrays me with more likelyhood. a woman who betrays me and i find out, is out. out of self respect. "you can do that wherever, just not by my side" & done. this is, of course pure misogony, as women are to choose the men. and men have no say. in an equal society. and it has of course nothing to do with genetic procreation. nothing with ensuring the child to be your own. which is important to me.
first check mark: "is she a slut?"
also... i would check for epigenetics. certain behaviours. plus we would have to create a space of love together. men and women had had more time. we are to be there again.

[MzAsh]

The easiest way to find out what a man is looking for is to take sex off the table and see how interested and invested he still is. And do this over a longer period of time, because any fuckboy can wait it out a few days or weeks. A man who a interested in dating you will still vie for your time even with sex off the menu. Qualify him accordingly.

[ObscuredBeyond]

There's an old flame of mine in the Philippines, that when she's going through troubles, I still wish I could be there to wipe her tears away - even though she's given me enough reason not to care, that any other man would've long kicked her to the curb and forgotten her by now. And it's not like I entertain some delusion of getting any sex from her, now or ever. I know that's not going to happen. But somehow, I can't bring myself to ever completely let go of her. To walk away from her Instagram, and stay gone. Sure, I give her plenty of freedom, and plenty of space. But for her to be gone completely? I'd still be broken. Even after everything she's done; even after all the disagreements her and I have had.

Some think genuine love like this is the same as cuckery. That the only way for a man to stand up for himself, is to treat a woman like her like absolute shit. But I know better. There are boundaries I don't let her cross. And boundaries of hers that I don't cross either.

I essentially gave her one simple guideline to follow: "I know you're gonna do what you're gonna do; even if I am convinced it's wrong. But when everything goes to Hell, I'm still willing to hear you out. If I could, I'd still wrap myself around you, like a protective coat. Even after the world forsakes you."

I do hope she never screws up that bad, however. Because I now have plenty of my own problems to worry about.

[bamesjond0069]

This is good advice and i agree 100%. in my opinion girls who dont do this are not in a mental place to even be in a relationship.

[Gangactivities911]

No it’s not at all. Any man with a grain of self respect will not play ur nonsense games.

[Gangactivities911]

Playing hard to get is just annoying in my opinion, I really don’t want to go for a girl who does that maybe my mind will change at some point.

[MzAsh]

This isn’t about playing hard to get. It’s about *being* in alignment of her standards and boundaries. Only weak men want a woman who serves herself up to him on a silver platter for no effort on his part.

[Gangactivities911]

Oh ok I see what ur saying yeah that’s fair.

[bamesjond0069]

I wouldn't say thats why though. Just id want someone who wasn't sleeping with everyone else. If she's making everyone wait I don't know 3 months she's far better than most women out there and has some self respect. If she slept with every tom dick and harry on the first date then waiting is meaningless in terms of making it better for the man but ofc for her only men who stick around for her stick around she just has less chance of it working

[MzAsh]

I understand that’s your view of it but women don’t wait in order to please the man. She does it to test his genuine interest, loyalty, patience, and compliance, not to appear more virtuous to him.

[bamesjond0069]

"She does it to test" no man with self respect will bother with a "test" that he must lose. This strategy only works if the girl has a innocent past OR she specifically wants a simp doormat man. But i believe those are the men you prefer if i remember correct.

[MzAsh]

I understand some men get anxious about that word, but they do the same even if they aren’t aware of it. Everyone has their own strategies for qualifying the best partner for themselves. It’s necessary when you have multiple options, as is the case for most women.

[MzAsh]

I mean, what did you think I meant when I said “qualify accordingly?” She’s qualifying him.

[bamesjond0069]

Qualifying him is not the point. Never was. Sure in a way it does but the whole point is to not play stupid games but to be a high value woman. Women who wait have more dating value. Women who dont have low dating value. This is the biggest part. A low value women cannot attract a high value man to even test him in the first place. I agree qualifying a man is good as well and important but when you qualify a man by playing mind games then its a huge red flag for men and we dont see those girls as worth anything. Its one thing to wait because a girl waits and thats who she is, someone with high standards. Its a total other thing that a woman cares less about waiting but wants to pretend she does to deliver a test. This is a sign she is a manipulator, has an over inflated ego and doesn't respect the man she's seeing in the first place.

[MzAsh]

Of course she needs to be high value, and a big part of being a high value woman is understanding how to vet men properly. And that includes placing as much value on his ability to wait for sex as he does for hers. He can’t be throwing his dick at every hot girl he wants to get with it and then turn around and act like she’s lesser because she’s been promiscuous in her past. High value women look for men who practice what they preach, and that’s terribly overlooked when men give dating advice.

[bamesjond0069]

I don't think really any women think that is why waiting is important. Its practical if he waits for you he wants you for more than sex. can't forget if she doesn't make men wait then she will rack up a fast past so i mean she has to do it for herself. Lets not pretend male innocence is valued at all. Even religious women dont typically value male innocence. Self control yes but no more than maybe 5 girls in all america are out there looking for a virgin husband. Lmao.

[MzAsh]

Also, I agree with you against playing mind games but we have to understand the difference between mind games and strategy. Mind games are deceitful. Strategy is straightforward. For example, It would be deceitful for a woman to deliberately lead a man to believe he’s getting sex at the end of a date if she knows she’s not going to allow sex to happen. However, it’s strategy if she tells him “I’m not having sex with you until I know you’re the right kind of guy for me.” Then, she continues to evaluate him for however long she needs to.

[MzAsh]

It’s not necessarily male “innocence” but it’s sexual loyalty. A woman’s biological imperative is to know that there’s NO chance of him having had babies with other women, at least while he’s with her because she needs to be secure in knowing he’s going to be the faithful provider, protector, and supporter of their family …not some other family he spawned.

[bamesjond0069]

Agree. I think this is accomplished through his self control by waiting. Whereas a woman waiting is not how a man accomplishes this exact same sort of "test", its accomplished through her past and specifically through virginity if applicable. Ie a man doesn't care if she makes him wait 6 months or 6 days, if she was a virgin or has an approved past thats sufficient to satisfy the qualification for the man. But it seems we agree that in general women should be waiting.

Unfortunately in my experience the highest value women aren't doing this much and the lowest value women are. Facepalm. Thats where my initial issue came from that assumption from what you said.

[MzAsh]

Well, there are many Khloe Kardashian type women who men *think* are high value but are loaded with insecurity and foolishly select sub par selfish men who can’t keep their pants zipped. That’s why she’ll forever have to share her baby daddy with a community of other women who he also has fathered babies with.

[MzAsh]

Kendall is probably the wisest out of the group with her mindset that none of these guys are good enough for her.

[bamesjond0069]

Lmao yes. But i mean its really a double whammy because yes they usually pick bad men but then they behave in a way to encourage misbehavior and if they do somehow get with a decent guy... they still encourage misbehavior. So its almost certain it will end bad no matter who they choose.

[monorprise]

This is a really big problem for many modern young women in the age of Social media.

Never before have so many girls had access to such a large number of guys both willing and able to shower them with cheap attention.

Naturally as it would with anyone this causes them to assume the value of said attention and men is very low, or almost worthless. Thinking themselfs somehow special treasure too good for almost any man.

In truth those same men are doing the same thing to hundreds of other women most simply to see something sexy, many playing the field for the remote possibility of sex or just pictures.

If women think this attention is real, or that they have a serous chance with any of theses men they are devaluing the real men they do have and compromising that relationship.

[HopefulGuy94]

I will take it so short , to me , if the relationship has started including sexuality the rest of it won't be well in terms of everything related to that relationship , cuz everything will be screwed up in the future. The innocence , purity , meaning of the relationship is deadly damaged if it happens. Lust is a really harmful thing if the feelings cannot be controlled and results in ending up of a relationship. Avoiding that is the key factor for leading "serious" relationship , just keep in mind and remember your past (for most of you) then you will agree with me.

[Subarugirl]

lol I think this is a more common issue among men then it is for women. For example he want's to get laid so bad he either doesn't realize of choses to ignore that they are a shitty partner. For women it is a little different, usually they want to so badly to feel loved that they are willing to ignore that he is a shitty partner.

[myTake Owner]

Valid point. Trying to hookup immediately by dating down, vs putting in some effort to get to know a better quality girl through dates and talking and taking time. And of course throwing money at girls like a sugar daddy to try to get women way out of your league.

[Subarugirl]

Exactly, I think a lot of people are disappointed and get hurt because they have that mentality

[MrtoddsWildRide]

Agreed and I think they feed each other. The more women a man hooks up with, the more he thinks he's the "manly man" that women want and so he starts tossing attention at every woman those women in turn feel validated and chase after Chad who is just looking to bang them and round and round it goes.
A lot of men need to be more honest about their intentions and a lot of women need to be more realistic about what those intentions are.

[1-3-2-4]

I went out on a date with this girl.. seemed really nice very innocent looking.. got turned down for the next date even when she knew it was being planned up.. turns out I got the lets be friends and then lets be friends first.. turns out she was into my friend who is more of a bad boy type/look.. they already had sex at least twice that I know of.. I can't even look at this girl the same..
If that's what she wanted she should of been more up front.. but people that know have been kind of rubbing it in her face they all thought it was pretty dirty.
It's sad she's 31 and a 10 year old so I mean time is not on her side ya know.

[Anonymous]

"Women can hookup with much hotter guys than they can actually date" This! This right here. That's why they're doing the hookups.

A woman tunes herself into a BMW to get corvettes. No woman becomes a BMW to date the lemon with the scratched paint job, cracked windshield and rusted hub caps. A lot of women are going to realize that there are 2 corvettes for every 100 BMW's and the corvettes want to drag race with as many BMW's as they can. The BMW's however, want long slow romantic drives under the moonlight. The Corvette's don't care, they can get so many BMW's. So Either the BMW is going to stay single for a long time hoping for a different corvette, join them, or take the lemon. It's a lose lose. Most are going to take #2 because #1 isn't as available to us as you think and no woman really wants #3 and most believe they're going to arrive at #4 anyway. Some see it as at least the corvette turns me on, I'm getting absolutely nothing out of the lemon.

[myTake Owner]

See right there is the female problem. You phrase it as picking between corvettes vs lemons, as if it's a binary choice and those are your only two options.

[Opinion Owner]

Enlighten me, what do you think are the other options?

[myTake Owner]

Simple. Life isn't a choice between corvettes and lemons. There's bmws, there's mustangs, there's chargers, there's corollas, there's lexuses and jeeps, etc. If you think your choices are corvettes or a junker, that's a worldview where you miss out on a huge amount of good models.

[Opinion Owner]

Maybe I should have been more clear. The corvette is a symbol for luxury cars as is the BMW. The lemon is the symbol for non luxury unwanted cars. Most women want attractive and/or successful men, with good quality traits, the corvettes (luxury cars) and not those who are unattractive and unsuccessful, the lemons (or non luxury cars). When it comes to hooking up most women are going to go for who she views as a corvette every time. That's the point of it. If you told a woman they'd only get those other non luxury models to sleep with, most of us wouldn't bother. Those other models (non luxury) are a dime a dozen. Corvettes (hot successful guys ) are the dream, they're rare.

by the way, I'm not saying I agree with hookup culture.

[myTake Owner]

Oh I got ya. And I guess it depends on how successful you define success. https://igotstandardsbro.com/

[Opinion Owner]

I don't understand what the link is for?

And yes, it depends on the woman seeking the man. It's based on what she thinks is attractive and/or what she thinks is successful. That guy is her corvette. If those guys were so plentiful, easily available and attainable, then no woman would be doing online dating.

[Anonymous]

100% I’m probably a 8/10 looks, charm, career.

When I was looking for a hookup the easy guarantee was look for a 6 that wanted the attention. Shoot for a 10 and my chances were probably 50/50 and we had to connect… as the rating goes down the odds go up.

When I was ready for a relationship I wouldn’t even look in the direction of someone that wasn’t a 9/10 and then she had to have the personality to go along with it. The 6’s I’d have fun with had no chance.

As a desired guy it was always easy to fall into a relationship.

For women you want a relationship and chase it. Sex falls in your lap bc as men that’s what we chase.

[dolemite89]

i heard a podcast about something similar to this. Social media and especially tinder is inflating girls egos cuz even average looking girls get so much attention from guys and have plenty of options to choose from for sex but they eventually learn that yes a lot of guys would sleep with them but the guys they actually wanted usually didn't want them for a relationship.

[myTake Owner]

Yes, the cliche of the fat ugly girl demanding good looking 6' guys only haha

[Star_88]

That's why I always reject guys for whom having a sex after a particular point in dating is a must.
They always pretend to be innocent and that they wanna date you but at the cost of sex.
Those bastards tried to gaslight me into thinking that I'm the conservative one and need to break my virginity instead of holding it.

[VanillaSalt]

If your actually a virgin and not a “born again virgin” then you have something most women don’t… that being said when the town slut starts slowing down because their ready to settle down… it means their settling. Ok I’ve had my fun with the hot guys I choose you not cause your the best I can get your the best I can keep… that’s insulting. And for a woman like that to deny me sex… well I’m sorry I value sex so if your gonna withhold that value your value to me just went down.

Again real conservative women whom have partners near mine Ide never argue with as that’s who they are and it’s impressive in its own right… but when you know she’s not and she still won’t fuck you there’s an issue.

[Star_88]

@VanillaSalt yeah I get it. But I'm a real virgin.. not a "born again virgin" because once that thing is lost, why to stop? That's why I never started..

[Tinylove360]

Let me guess this article is basically saying that women are washed up and wrothless after age 25 because men don't want women older than 25 unless it's for sex and he'll never catch feelings or take her seriously.
Life is unpredictable. What if the women divorced when she was 25 because the man found someone new? Does that make her washed up? What if she was in an abusive relationship when she decided to leave at age 25? What if he died? What if she just couldn't find someone she connected with? The advice in this article could work wonderfully for one person and destroy another.
I honestly feel like articles like these are just there to scare women and make them panic into settling down with anyone regradless of how long they knew each other. I'm not saying that women should sleep around with a bunch of men but I also don't think we should be trying to scare women into early marriage either.

[VanillaSalt]

Did you even read the damn article? Not even remotely what we said…

[VanillaSalt]

Was said…

[bamesjond0069]

As a man who fucks every girl i get my hands on... you didn't really mention how it messes up a girls relationship value. The more sex she's had the less dateable she is for numerous reasons. Guys generally dont fuck everything that walks to be lifelong playboys, its because we have lots of dating value and no girls have the same amount of dating value except a young hot virgin and since those girls are insanely rare and since we have lots of options ofc we are just going to keep fucking everyone.

[MrtoddsWildRide]

That kind of raises it in my eyes, but I am weird

[bamesjond0069]

@MrtoddsWildRide how so?

[MrtoddsWildRide]

Well... that's not something discussed in polite company

[bamesjond0069]

@MrtoddsWildRide uhh ok. I mean i dont go into the office and say "announcement everyone..." lol

[Laughingatyou_yesyou]

My dude who is fucking all these sluts while you are busy on here? It's hilarious that you think anyone would believe people who actually have sex talk like this. If you were so busy with women you wouldn't need to spend your time trying to impress people with your conquests you'd be out there having them. No one believes you or is impressed. I promise. You belong in the Ihavesex reddit instead of here. People would laugh you off the internet. Let's not pretend you've ever touched a woman. Let me rephrase that - let's pretend not pretend you ever touched a woman with her permission. This forum is too funny.
Ps. Added humor content. You only find young, I experienced women attractive because they won't have anytime to compare you to and tell you how shit you are in bed. I assure you - you don't have to worry about sleeping with women high or low value while you jerk yourself off on here. It's not attractive. Lol.

[bamesjond0069]

@Laughingatyou_yesyou someones mad that men think sluts are pieces of shit. Lmao.

[Laughingatyou_yesyou]

Lol. I assure you I'm not. I have a relationship and gasp he doesn't mind I slept with people before him. You are small dick energy my friend. You can call me anything you want and I'm gonna laugh and I'm gonna share with my friends who also are going to laugh. This forum is wild. Why aren't you out slut hunting? Is your right hand tired?

[bamesjond0069]

@Laughingatyou_yesyou i have a girlfriend.

[Gidge]

What does your virgin 19 year old girlfriend think about that?

Internet Chads: They Wish

[bamesjond0069]

@Gidge do you not think guys who are 35 dont date 19 yos or do you think they just are too dumb to use the internet? Smh. 🤣

[Anonymous]

I agree to an extent.
As if men dont want top tier women aka young women who are virgin but also good in bed. These women are the tiny minority. Young women are 10-30% of female population and so are the tall men in america/Asian countries. How many of you would date/marry women over 35 ? At lest this is what ai got told. Maybe i am wrong
If you also live in north Europe/central Europe wanting tall men ain't unrealistic. According to statistics younger men aka men at marriageable age are also taller than older men. I have seen more tall men than short guys. All my male cousins are tall but the generation of my dad ain't that tall as their sons

I personally would stay away from handsome men to avoid risks and they are "stupid" or a fboy. I am not ugly but i would never trust a handsome guy even if i was very pretty

[bamesjond0069]

"Young women are 10-30% of female population" irrelevant. ALL as in 100% of women are or were young women. ALL as in 100% of women are or were virgins. Just because most women throw away their natural value doesn't mean men have to accept that. Im 35 and not a freaking nut job, therefore my girlfriend is 19 and was a virgin when we started dating. Literally every girl in the world can or could have met my minimum qualifications they just didn't want to.

[Opinion Owner]

There will be allways 10-30% of young women. It does not matter whether we were young or not. So majority of men will be single if they only want women under 30

[bamesjond0069]

Except thats not true either. Men can date young women at any age. I dated young girls when i was young and i still only date young girls in my mid 30s. I always say if she's not the one, just wait because every day more girls are turning 18. Where this is not how it works for women, every day the set pool of men your age and older men are marrying or dying out of it so its shrinking.

[Opinion Owner]

This is not true. Statistically women dont marry old men, they marry OLDER men. Young women dont prefere old men. Wanting young virgin attractive woman is like wanting attractive rich tall man. If you prefere this group of women, you have to compete with 80% of men. Majority of men can't just get a woman, when they want, otherwise there would not a huge minority of incels on gag who complain and trashtalk women

[bamesjond0069]

Well i can't speak for incels but i am well off and a good height and attractive. If anything i am able to hook up with more 18 year old girls at 35 than when i was 18 or even 21. This is how it works for me. And this is why i pump and dump without thought any girl over 22 or slept with more than 3 guys. I dont even try to be friends with them 99% of the time because i have better women to date.

[Opinion Owner]

As long you dont play with women to get sex and your intentions are clear in the beginning, then you are ok

[bamesjond0069]

Yes and no. No matter what you say many women are stupid and think if you have sex you want a relationship. Or that having sex on the first date leads to a relationship. Lmfao leads to a dump everyone knows this.

[Opinion Owner]

Tf are you talking about? Do you tell them your honest intentions or do you do mind games? Not all Women can't read your mind, especially young inexperienced women are naive

[Opinion Owner]

I personally prefere waiting till marriage but in western countries many people dont wait till marriage. Of course majority of western women will have sex in a relationship.

[bamesjond0069]

I dont tell anyone anything. How do i know what their sexual history is when i meet them? I go out and have a good time and eventually we kiss or something and many times have sex. Its their fault if they dont ask any important questions before they have sex. Its not my responsibility to tell some girl i just meet "i dont date hos but i fuck them" which is also quite vague and presumptuous because how do i know what she's there for either? We hardly know each other why should i assume she's there for marriage? Most women aren't dating for marriage and to suggest even that would immediately end the date. I date women of many ages even older if they are hot. Im just friendly and nice and put off a good vibe and i click with most women. Pretty much all women who have sex right away get used for sex... duh? I mean are they stupid or do they not care or want to be used for sex? One must be true.

[Opinion Owner]

Yes you should tell as they should ask it but who tf asks a man whether he is a fboy or not. Majority of men will tell you that they are nice. You could tell them that you dont want anything serious with them

[bamesjond0069]

But how do i know i dont until i get to know them? And why am i supposed to be so responsible to question them and inform them... when they have no responsibility to ask or even get to know me? Are women stupid or something?

[Opinion Owner]

Because you are an old f, whild the women you date are blood young and so they are naive and less mature than you due to not finished brain-development that influence your maturity and personality. Are men like you stupid or why do they dont understand. As a much older man you should be more responsible than the teenies whom you date

[Opinion Owner]

It is common knowledge that teenies are less immature and have unstable personality unlike people over 21+

[Opinion Owner]

I personally would expect from myself to be more responsible and mature when dating younger people

[bamesjond0069]

Whats the harm? The sluts already have fucked like 20 guys at age 18... one more isn't hurting them. Im not having casual sex with some virgin and not calling her back. Trust me thats who i am calling back.

And even all the girls i dont get in relationships with most of them think im a great guy. I literally have pictures of me and 4 girls i banged all bumping into each other at a festival and i introd them all and now they are all friends and getting along great. My girlfriend is friends with 1 exgf 1ex friends with benefits and 1 ons... Most women freaking love me. Even the ones i called sluts and said im not going to date them.

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah and i am angelina jolie

[bamesjond0069]

You clearly never got to know a conventionally high value man if you're so shocked.

[Gidge]

@bamesjond0069 If this was true, you wouldn't be on here. You'd be spending time with your girlfriend. I'm going to have to call bs.

[bamesjond0069]

@Gidge my girlfriend is sitting right next to me on the couch talking to her mom. And the movie we are watching is paused. Clearly youve never been in a relationship if you think one has no time to do anything if they are in one. Im mostly only on here when im waiting for people or taking a shit.

[Kaamraj]

It's correct, basic capitalism. The average man is invisible to the average woman, or about 90% of women are after the top 10% of men. They can get all the sexual attention they want, but relationships and ultimately marriage is only for the select few.

[Gidge]

To be fair, if a man takes care of himself physically and is reasonably self-sufficient, meeting women isn't a problem. No one ever takes into account that so many men are grossly out of shape. If men are fit and present well, women notice.

[Just_call_me_Levi]

Surprised by the mostly positive reception of this mytake, honestly refreshing to see.

I personally agree with most that was written, looking at what I consider important in a girl I would date, looks are on there, but very low compared to personality.

[sp33d]

The sexual market value and price range shopping talk is hilarious :D It's like you sincerely believe all that

I would say extremal advice is seldom good and it applies here, as well. Can you make a single point without some kind of rhetorical hyperbole? For example you make it sound like a "decently attractive woman has an endless supply of hookup partners and she doesn't have to lift a finger for it". That's not real, let Hollywood stay in Hollywood, hmm?

[myTake Owner]

that statement is reality, not rhetoric. I've experimented with that on tinder and bumble myself. Make a profile with a decently attractive women's pictures, simply say looking for casual, and the profile will have 100+ matches waiting within a few hours. 500+ within a few days. I tried it using a chubby girl as the profile and was surprised at the amount of ripped guys with great muscles who swiped right too--not just fit, but legit ripped with six pack abs.

[sp33d]

Conduct the same experiment but outside of dating app world to avoid cherry picking.

[myTake Owner]

I don't need too with how today's dating is heavy on apps. In both cases the girl profile got an absolutely massive amount of matches for casual sex. Is it literally limitless? No. But could a decently attractive woman easily have 100 sex partners a year by a big city if she wished? Yes.

[sp33d]

You do. The percentage of population that's actually using dating apps is very small. And you still can't make a single measured response. Everything's got to be blown out of proportion. You seem to be overlooking something extremely basic, as well. Just because the app gives a match for "casual sex" does not mean that these two people need to have "casual sex". Getting match makes neither party a "casual sex" partner.

Thirdly, your experiment is flawed from the start, but let's assume this circus is worthwhile. Why don't you find pictures of what you think are "average" looking and work your way up to "smoking hot"? Just another example, where you go to extremes.

The only thing that's reality is your simple-mindedness. You already know what you want the result to be, so you are cherry picking to validate your confirmation bias.

[sp33d]

Preface the entire thing by all of the OP being your opinion and problem solved - we can shelve it with the rest of the "sexual market" fiction. While I don't fault some of the people who blindly agree with you due to their lack of education and their own biases, it makes me sick you are knowingly exploiting them for it just to feel good about yourself.

[Vegasrunner]

This is an excellent take. Woman do this a lot where they try to convince a man that because guys will have sex w/ then = them having value. If you've delt w/ enough women I'm sure you've heard them say "I can get dick whenever I want" You should remind them so can their friends or any woman on earth for that matter, but can you keep one good dick?

[Gidge]

Not a slut, but here's the real red pill: they can. And most men who say they wouldn't wife a slut would proudly do it.

[Vegasrunner]

@Gidge Some will simply because they can't get better but very few women are able to keep a high value man to themselves. Which is why you mostly hear women complaining about relationships or lack of good ones.

[caitycat21]

No offense but I’m not taking dating advice from a guy. Y’all don’t understand how we work and I barely understand how y’all work

[myTake Owner]

Then go have fun and learn the hard way. :)

[caitycat21]

I’d rather learn from actual women. You’re a dude and have no idea what it’s like being a female

[myTake Owner]

Theeeen why do you even click on mytakes from men?

[caitycat21]

I said I’m not taking your advice for women ? That doesn’t include all the entire platform

[MrtoddsWildRide]

www.youtube.com/channel/UCRZAEjMsDpiuVWQk8-OIf9A
There is a woman. She's figured out what men want and why so many women find themselves looking for "good men"

[Guffrus]

If you don't learn that every argument stands on its own merits and has nothing what so ever to do with who said it; you are going to have a head full of bullshit.

So have fun with that.

[caitycat21]

@MrtoddsWildRide I’m not taking recommendations from men either. Men usually only view content that boosts their ego

[caitycat21]

@Guffrus why do you care about the fact I said I don’t want to listen to this one random stranger on the internet? That has nothing to do with any valid arguments

[Guffrus]

Because you are demonstrating what an ignorant sexist pig you are.

I find that undesirable so I thought i would take some time out of my day to try and steer you in a better direction.

But i can't know what i am talking about because penis.

[jasco]

@Guffrus So no offense to you but do you think this man's opinion on women is invalid because he's not a woman? Or something else?

[Guffrus]

@jasco I am arguing that who a person is has nothing to do with their understanding or argument. In this it is gentials but it could easily be social standing, formal qualifications, etc.

The reverse is also true, just because someone has qualifications or status or the correct gentials does not make their argument correct.

You must judge each argument on its own merit.

[jasco]

@Guffrus ok and what is wrong with his argument?

[Guffrus]

@jasco I agree with his argument.

[jasco]

@caitycat21 why do you not agree with his opinion because he's not a women? @guffrus sorry i targeted the wrong person.

[Guffrus]

@jasco That information is already in the thread; she doesn't agree because penis.

[jasco]

@Guffrus So wouldn't that mean she wouldn't agree with most of history, math, science, anything that has to do with men. Sense she seems to not want to take a opinion of someone because of their gentails?

[Guffrus]

@jasco She is 15 years old and doesn't have the mental equipment to determine good information from bad so she is grasping at straws.

[jasco]

@Guffrus ok well thats a very interesting point of view but I like @caitycat21 to answer

[Guffrus]

@jasco Yes, of course. I am not presuming to speak for her I am simply drawing your attention to information which is already in the thread.

[MrtoddsWildRide]

@Guffrus
"I’m not taking recommendations from men either"
I'm 49 and yo are 15. I've spent a lot more time in the world of dating than you and I have actually talked to women about their experiences.
What you are saying here is the same thing as saying you wouldn't let a doctor treat your cancer unless they have had cancer

[Guffrus]

@MrtoddsWildRide Im sorry but the comment you made seems to be jibberish to me.

You are quoting what someone else has said and then directing it at me.

Perhaps I am misunderstanding what you are saying but it seems to me that you have not read and understood the thread at all.

[Guffrus]

@MrtoddsWildRide Wait, I see what you are saying now.

It's my mistake.

Yes, it's kind of like that.

[Guffrus]

@MrtoddsWildRide I dont particularly care for the assertion that because you are older you automatically know better though.

Thats actually the issue here.

She is saying that a man can't have any insight or understanding of things which affect women because they dont have a vagina.

A vagina isn't a prerequisite for that knowledge.

In the same way being older or being a doctor does not mean that your argument has merit.

The core concept here is that arguments stand or fall on their merits, not on who put them forward.

But I do agree with the aspect of life experience being relevant to how one can have insight into the female experience even when one is not female.

Also of course both genders are relevant here because what is being discussed is an interaction between genders, so the dynamics can be viewed from either side.

[caitycat21]

@Guffrus Sexism to most men is just a buzzword used to try and silence women that say shit that makes them uncomfortable.

Unless you can show me where women are in all these positions of power running shit , objectifying men, and making them hate themselves than I don’t want to hear crap about men facing sexism

[MrsTurkleton]

In a few years, you will realise that the most honest advice you will get about guys is from a guy. You will need it.
Because no matter how experienced in dealing with guys a woman becomes, we will never know what it is like to be in a guy’s head.
If you go to your girlfriends for their opinion about a guy, they will give it from their perspective. A woman’s perspective.
If you want advice about a guy, ask a guy. You might not get the answer you want, but you will get the truth

When you’ve been dating a while, you learn the difference between a guy who is genuinely interested in you and a guy who wants to fuck you, & It takes being used a couple of times to learn that lesson…. so, at your age, instead of dismissing it, take it as a heads up.

[Guffrus]

@Guffrus Sexism to most men is just a buzzword used to try and silence women that say shit that makes them uncomfortable.

Unless you can show me where women are in all these positions of power running shit , objectifying men, and making them hate themselves than I don’t want to hear crap about men facing sexism

Ok lets have a look at this.

So, firstly don't talk about what you think most men think sexism is when what you are actually trying to say is that I specifically am misusing the word.

That is just cowardly and pathetic and furthermore you are still epically failing to grasp the premise put to you; that you must evaluate every argument on its individual merits. You do not get to dismiss anything on the basis of what most people might be doing, this is an argument from popularity and a logical fallacy. So your argument is invalid, meaningless.

You then create an impossible standard for being willing to listen to another persons view.

This defined standard again illustrates how sexist you are because you are telling me that because I have a penis I am responsible for the actions taken by male politicians or others of influence.

This is clearly completely unreasonable as the obvious truth is that with regard to this situation my gender is irrelevant, what I am is an ordinary citizen a voter at best and I have no more power or say in what goes on than you will when you are of voting age, which is virtually no say.

So do yourself a favour, get off this feminazi bandwagon, go and figure out what a valid argument is and stop talking complete and total bullshit.

[caitycat21]

Yeah I’m not reading all of that

[caitycat21]

Seriously, why are you arguing with my point. It should be common sense you a grown ass white dude have nothing of merit to tell me about dating. I’m not arguing my position further because it’s
Pointless. You already said you think I’m a “feminazi”. I really don’t care, that isn’t even a valid criticism. It’s just name calling.

It’s unfortunate at your grown age you still use such childish behavior.

Half of your entire rant is taking stuff I said completely out of context anyways.

[MrtoddsWildRide]

"I know more about what men want then men do. Also you are white" is a hell of a way of thinking.

[Guffrus]

You are clearly hell bent on being an ignorant shit for brained cunt.

I tried to help you to remove your head from your ass, I can't do more than that.

[caitycat21]

You’re proving my point exactly. Referring to women you disagree with as “cunts” you don’t respect women. Most men don’t respect women in today’s society because disrespecting women is so normalized but I’m not surprised.

Notice how I never once in this thread name called you or rendered to you in derogatory terms? Yet you expect me to have a conversation with you

[caitycat21]

@MrtoddsWildeRide I don’t care about what men want. I’d rather be alone my entire life than try to please a man that isn’t going to respect me as a human being

[Guffrus]

Your genitals are nothing to do with it, I'm not calling you a cunt because you are a woman, I'm calling you a cunt because you are a cunt.

You don't have any high ground, you opened by telling me that I don't matter because of my genitals.