Women Want What They Can't Understand & Can't Have - Are You Either One?

Women Want What They Can't Understand & Can't Have - Are You Either One?

In the beginning it was said that God made man, and then made women from man hence woman. However, drama started in the garden, because Adam was a whuss, and she got curious. Confused? Don’t be I’ll explain later, keep reading.

Why Can't You Get That Second Date?

Have you ever wondered why, you can’t get that second date with that hot chick you been obsessing over? Sure you have. I’m sure you’re a nice guy,and have loads to offer, but somehow that is not enough.

Sadly, I write this article, blog, and take, respectfully; because not only have I had experiences where I tanked and got pushed in the friend zone, and came out holding myself instead of her. I found that men are egotistical and hate correcting their actions, resulting in a continuance of the same results.

My Story

I knew a girl once, let’s call her Jessica, because I have never met an ugly Jessica. She was a nurse, with a tall athletic body, legs from here to Tallahassee. Golden skin, plum lips and smile, so intoxicating I tripped over myself when she was near. Her voice was light and raspy, she had a slight accent, and her eyes changed with her mood. Needless to say I was in Love.

I met her through a mutual friend, it was originally a blind date, and this is how it went.

I got spiffy, washed my car, and brought her flowers, met her at the restaurant. Every door I opened, I talked about all of my achievements, you know, just to tell her that she was out with a great guy.

I told her multiple times how beautiful she was, but I killed her with the compliments:

“Your eyes, are gorgeous."

"Love your outfit."

"Your hair is beautiful."

"You're sexy, probably get a lot guys after you?”

The restaurant was fancy, candlelit and the whole nine yard. Afterwards, we separated and I hovered, hoping to get a kiss.

Finally, we separated, and as soon as I got in my car and headed on my way home, I started missing her. I called her right away, and with a smooth voice, I told her, “Hey baby, I miss you already, what do you want to do tomorrow?” I held the phone in my sweaty palms and held the phone from my ears because I thought I lost connection.

“Hello,” I say weakly. “Yeah, I’m here,” she chuckled, and continued, “You're silly, Tony, I think you’re a nice guy, but I’m busy. Maybe some other time.” She hung up because her mom called suddenly.

Women Want What They Can't Understand & Can't Have - Are You Either One?

Anybody speak womanese? Because at the time, I did not know I was being let down easily. I pursued her tirelessly; we went out on many dates, but as friends only.

I spent money, and heard about her cute guy friends. I’d call and she be hanging with dudes at the pool, and going on overnight trips with them.

So what gives? Anybody know what I did wrong? Well if you don’t, let me explain….

Become the Challenge

Statistics show that 90% of women lose interest in men, who are not a challenge. What it means is that women would rather chase you, because she is a curious creature.

When I got the date with Jessica, I was good with being a gentlemen, but I should have just took her to a coffee house for the first date. If you are just meeting a girl, rather it be a blind date, or someone you have met face to face, start off with something simple to see what’s up.

Stop Spending Money

Spending money on a girl may send the wrong signals to her. She may feel that you’re trying to really impress her, by your throwing money around. Women can easily feel objectified and you don’t want that.

For the man, who does this, keep in mind that you don’t have to be fancy for the first meeting because she may not like you. Stay within your budget and build a rapport with her, and once you're sure she likes you, then bump her up from Starbucks to The Cheesecake Factory.

Don't Talk Too Much

Its okay to show her yourself, she wants to see it, just not all of it at one time. You are the man, so your job is to interview her and listen to what she is saying, pick up on her personality, what she likes, what really grinds her gears, and what melts her heart.

When I talked about my achievements, I thought she would be impressed. I wanted to show her that I wasn’t some lame slob, sitting on couch playing video games all day. However, your job is not to impress a woman, but to keep her interested.

After the date, her pretty little mouth should be dry after all the talking she has done, and then she should say, “I feel like I really don’t know too much about you because I had been talking all about me.”

Remember Gentlemen: Everyone loves talking about themselves, so letting her express who she is makes her feel she can talk to you, which is good, you have her hooked now.

Space, is Not the Final Frontier

Giving her space after the date is great. After you escort her to the car and you tell her you had a nice time. You lean in for a hug, and if you're lucky you might get a kiss, which would be AWESOME. Then you go your separate ways. Don’t text her, don’t call, let sometime pass.

“Oh but Tony, you are wrong, she will forget about me!”

No, she won’t forget about you, in fact she will wonder, why you haven’t called her. She will text or call you because she is curious if you are still interested.

Look, most guys she has dated, or still dating while going out with you are blowing up her phone, making promises that they can’t keep. She is entertained but she is tired of the same ole, same ole. You are hanging back, being cool, and mysterious like that bad ass vampire on Twilight.

When she calls you back or texts you, set up another date. If you don’t hear from her, call her in five to seven days and see if she is interested in going on a date. Until the date, stay off the phone and text sparingly. Remember guys the phone is for setting up the date - you can talk in person.

If you don’t heed my advice, you would have talked everyday, text all night and left no mystery, and she will get bored quickly or eventually.

Red Flags! Red Means Stop, Danger, Alert…

Women Want What They Can't Understand & Can't Have - Are You Either One?

When I professed my undying soul to Jessica, a chick I had just met, I alerted her and gave her the red flag. It said, “Danger Tony is a stage 5 clinger who needs your attention every waking moment.”

Meanwhile, she’s thinking "I can’t breathe, oh my God, this guy is psycho!"

Don't Reveal Too Much Too Soon

Remember guys, its okay to miss her, but keep that to yourself please! If you bare your soul too soon, then she will see you as weak, and that she has you too easily. You start getting mushy with a hot chick and see that you don’t get awkward silence.

How many guys on GAG have asked, “Why after I told her how I felt she acts strange?” Better yet How many girls have asked, “I like him, but he likes me more, and I don’t know if I want to be with him.” Remember guys its okay for women to tell you she loves you too soon, but it’s not good for the guy. Let her do the mushy stuff first, and then do it, but not so much.

Women Are Curious Creatures

As I said earlier Eve took the fruit only because she was told she couldn’t have it. Women are curious by nature, so spark her curiosity by not showing all your cards at once. If she truly likes you, she will explore you, and won't get tired of it.

As a matter of fact #myTake is more about the man being patient and careful about how he approaches a woman he adores.

Play the Game

“But Tony, you’re teaching men how to play games.”

Life is a game, everything you do from eating, working, driving, is related to strategy and being more efficient. Dating and relationships are the same. To get good at dating women you have to practice and know that women are beautiful creatures who just want a man to take it slow, and make her wonder.

We've all heard women say, “He’s got game!” so, play to win, my friend. If you want her, you'll have to do what it takes to win her.

Wisenguber is a GirlsAskGuys Editor
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Most Helpful Girl

  • It's not that women only want what they can't have. Its that most guys come on way too strong.

    Girls don't really wanna hear "oh bby I bet you have guys drooling over you uh huhhh"I mean it just sounds sleazy and desperate. Also purely sexual.

    And calling a girl to say you miss her as you leave the restaurant is just plain weird. especially on the first date. That is really really really weird.


Most Helpful Guy

  • One, males are altered forms of the female, therefore it is unlikely that Adam existed sooner than Eve did, if any of them existed in such form. Second, dating becomes easier if you get better at communicating with people in general, which is mostly based on having hobbies that can make you be more common with someone, and more importantly, you have better chances with people you actually do have things in common with. I don't really get this whole "getting better at dating women" thing, because all it boils down to is the perceived compatibility of two people. Other than that, I don't think there is much of s general scheme going on, especially one that is gender-specific.


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Join the discussion

What Girls Said 7

  • I found that men are egotistical and hate correcting their actions, resulting in a continuance of the same results. 👍 Best point of the article & 100% true! Men check you're EGO'S at the door.

    I also met a guy a month ago that sounded exactly like you did on the first date, & let's just say I dropped him like a hot potato. He just came on WAY too strong TOO fast, so guys listen to this man!

    • So you met a nice guy who was interested, treated you well, thought the world of you, and your response was to... drop him like a sack of concrete? Yes, that makes perfect sense.

    • Show All
    • Not this woman, so get your bitter asses off my post!

    • Honestly, I don't think anyone would want to hang out with guys with such bitter attitudes, much less have a committed relationship...

  • I really enjoyed your article and I agree with it :) I especially like how you were able to describe everything so sensibly!! So I just wanted to ask if you could write a similar article for woman, how we can make sure to not scare you men away, from a mans point of view?

    • Sure, that is a good idea, I will work on it... thank you for reading, that's awesome.

    • Thank you I would really appreciate it:) Most articles on this topic are so similar yet provide no reasons for why we shouldn't do those specific things around men. After reading your article I was very impressed and thought you could probably do a very good job describing why so thank you again for at least thinking about doing it :)

    • Well, I think its was for me to do I for men because, we suffer from making huge mistakes , and statistically women are picker, therefore men have more of a problem in this area. I am now doing research and have come up with a few good Ideas... I will email, you when I'm ready to post... thanxs again😁

  • Well, I actually think that's rather a good take on things. A couple of points I don't agree with but on the whole you seem to have quite the insightful mind.

  • it's not that we're curious. Personally, I cannot respect somebody who devotes their time and effort into impressing someone who they've just met. Get some self-respect, let me show you that I am somebody who deserves respect and effort, don't just give your heart out like lollipop sticks to random strangers who may be shitty people on the inside not worth your time.

    • True, and the fact that you think like that might quality you as a "shitty" or at least shallow person, lacking the inability to see a man for what he is, rather than dumping him for not being groomed enough for you.

  • Women just hate men that come off too strong from the start

  • From what I see in these comments, the men just aren't getting it... You set yourself up for failure by falling for a woman solely because you find her appearance to be incredibly attractive yet know NOTHING about her personality or mindset. At this point, it's a hit or miss whether she will be interested in you or not, and most often it's a miss because the men who drop everything just to impress a female whom they've just met come on WAY too strongly and it's a turn-off. Don't act needy or clingy. Give it some time and get to know each other before falling head over heels. Show interest, but don't give off the impression that you're dehydrated in a desert with no water. Acting desperate is never really attractive, but it's especially not attractive in the early stages of dating.

    • You are right, I am trying to share knowledge to my brothers who are unsuccessful in dating women. I for so long did not know how. I did not understand that with women it is much more than looks although it helps, but whats on the inside that counts. Also to take it slow, that was very hard for me in the beginning. I think it was because, I thought I couldn't do any better, that if I did not impress her, then I would not find another. However, from what life has taught me, there are plenty.

  • I liked this article, thanks :)


What Guys Said 5

  • I realize the idea of keeping women guessing and interested, but i have a habit of adapting to the woman im dating. So if the girl is very forward and coming off very strongly towards me, i thought it was fine for me to give her many compliments back. But maybe a guy should never do that regardless of how the woman acts, at least not in the early stages.

  • As simple as this sounds, I am going to be me, and if women do not want to be with me then unfortunately I guess I will end up single. I have no desire to play games, but in my experience women do play coy a lot. I think you have listed good advice for men to use to be more successful in the dating game.

    • I respect that my friend I thought the same way, but take a look at what the beautiful women below had to say. Good luck

  • A very honest and informative as well as helpful Take!

  • Women don't know what the fuck they want.

    • That's because modern social and cultural engineering fucks their basic biological tendencies up. Modern woman has to deny herself the desires for a strong "patriarchal" male who is indeed a "caveman"; they're taught that those are negative things and equals repression. It doesn't ofc. So at various cognitive/conscious levels they tell themselves things in which their body and primal brains don't.

      Classic modern dilemma is the woman who tries a nice guy and gets frustrated at how limp worsted he is through his pedeatalling of her (((chivalry))). Then she turns to what the betas call the "bad boy alphas", she then also realises they aren't alphas but simply beta simps too, putting on a poor facade of masculinity.
      Therefore she becomes confused, she suffers from cognitive, emotional and sexual dissonance; and to compound the issue further she can no longer (or never could anyway) articulate her own female sexuality.
      = Retarded modern gender dynamic.
      Same for men too.

  • "A woman wants what she can't understand" im living proof of that and great take man

    • "our job is not to impress a woman, but to keep her interested" lmao exactly

    • Show All
    • Yes I will admit that

    • @Victoria_xoxo admit what? and im glad you could read my gibberish lol

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