No more Mr. Nice guy! (Page 3)

[Anonymous]

What really happened to boys, young men, and grown men suddenly losing all sense of what the fuck to do and how to act? Like, what caused this whole "nice guy" phenomenon to actually happen?

I swear I see it popping up so much these days and each time I'm that much closer to going on a rampage. Were these dudes raised by single mothers? Is it another thing to blame feminism about? Did nobody tell them that it's alright to be a guy and do guy things?

WHAT HAPPENED?

[Mesonfielde]

I know the answer because I used to do the exact same thing, hell I even said the exact same thing even though I live on the other side of the planet. Made the same mistakes. Mention me if you actually are curious.

[FatherJack]

It is a criminal offence to be male in the Western world nowadays , didn't anyone tell you that !!

[Opinion Owner]

Lol @FatherJack... do you really think anyone takes you seriously?

And yeah, @Mesonfielde I used to be a "nice guy" as well. I learned that I was the cause of my problems, started doing what I wanted (which apparently makes you a "bad boy" to these dudes here), and things started turning out great for me.

I'm just wondering why so many of these fuckers are afraid of being male.

[FatherJack]

Media BRAINWASHING is what happened , men are forever bashed as stupid , useless , sex crazed perverts , hence my comment above , yes it was meant in jest !! Women being emotional thinkers are more prone to take it in & view men in a negative light. See my comments on the " Divide & Rule " tactics used by those that control the media.

[Opinion Owner]

So you're one of those people that automatically thinks woman = overly emotional? Go ahead and fix that problem, and you should see at least a bit of improvement with your bitterness ;)

[Joshua2332]

There is a name for girls like this and it starts with a b.

There is a difference between being nice and white knighting women. Treat them like you do with your guy friends and you won't get rejected for being too nice.

[muspelhem_5]

I agree in the sense of don't be a pushover. If a relationship is gonna work, there has to be balance in my opinion.

So in the situation you mentioned, you do her a favor, and she doesn't react much beyond thanking you. When you said "nice to see you", that was a step too far.

I think it's to do with putting in the effort you honestly think this person is worth and no more.

[PhiOmega]

That last line doesn't work, I've had to be civil and respectful to people id rather fight at times, it's called rising above

Do it for u, not them

[GalaxyFlame90]

Interesting. Well you can do what you want actually. But I can just tell either you were being overly nice or that girl was just plain straight out rude. Either way, I suggest don't quit on being nice. Someone out there really might appreciate you. Anyway there's only few of us nice guys left in the world. I suggest you keep it up and don't let this certain girl (s) get you down. They WILL regret not having you.

[Mustachekitteh]

That chick who blew you off about giving her sweater sounds like a serious cunt.

[Anonymous]

However, be careful, do not become someone who you are not. If you are a genuine nice person, keep being nice to your friends and family, just do not be nice while flirting. Huge mistake. Girls do not go for the boring, predictable, and safe routine of the the nice guys. Being somewhat of a jerk will spicy things up, giving you the opportunity of having a good time and making girls to want more of you. It will be a lot of fun but do not overdo it, particularly with your friends, because you can end up alone or being someone who you are not.

[Imagirl___]

I compleately agree with this.. This is a perfect definition of what you should do

[Janett21]

Why you think it is because you are a nice guy? It can be for many reasons why they dont date you:

-They may not find you attractive
-They may have a crush on someone else
-They may not like something else

Also I like nice guys.

[Anonymous]

Wow that girl was rather strange I'd think it was really caring I dont understand that!

But in terms of 'nice', personally id want to date someone with self-respect aka he's nice to me only if he bothered to get to know me and cn see that i am a person who is worth his effort that he expends on me in being nice. When i first meet a guy, being a little bit aloof but civil is nice, I want to earn his respect and 'niceness' rather than just get given it if that makes sense at all.

[Tomsta]

You missed your chance when she said "you're a nice guy aren't you" if that was me i'd see that as a opening to get more flirty and cheeky. But you may have been flirting but did you have a backbone/opinion on things or were you just agreeing with what everything she said?

[Tomsta]

You could say something along the lines off

"I can certainly be a bad boy in the right situation [wink], but for now i'll settle for being your own personal nice guy, shame there not many of us around anymore" Make sure it's said with a bit of joke in the voice

[MrKaneda]

It's not that girls don't like nice guys, it's that they don't like (for lack of a better term) pussies. Unfortunately, there is an overlap between nice and pussy, and being a jerk eliminates being a pussy. But what they want is a guy that isn't a jerk but also doesn't act like a child.

[zombiebabe]

i feel you on this dude.. you treat people well and in return you are treated like crap (i guess its the price to be paid when you're too naive or too good towards others).. no more nice girl too... nice take by the way

[Behemoose]

Just find a friends with benefits and wait for the right girl to come along. Patience is tough when you're lonely but it pays off when you make a list of what you want in a woman and don't compromise.

[Anonymous]

Again another mytake talk about the stupid guy sorry but this is the stupid guy not the good guy

let me tell you something the good guy is girl magnet

It's its about the stupid guy bcoz of the jacket.

[ManuelMarquez]

What's wrong with helping that woman with her jacket?

[Opinion Owner]

Sorry I thought he act to be nice

I didn't read I follow my instinct

[Mesonfielde]

Yes, he did

[Samstun]

I'd rather be alone than with a stupid girl who'd fall for an asshole version of me. It's not a question of principle, I just can't imagine myself being satisfied that way.

So instead I work on my own problems, flaws, happiness, confidence.
I think women are becoming gradually more interested in me as a result, but I prefer to not put too much stock into that yet.

[Anonymous]

The problem is you're looking in wrong places. I know many people here won't like my answer but still I'll say it.
Nice girls don't flirt. Any girl who give a nice response to your flirting is a habitual flirt. She won't just lock eyes with you, there are many others. So instead of being nice with bitches try finding someone who's as nice as you. That would take time but it's going to be worth it.

[MaskedSanity]

What a load of horse shit.

So every girl that ever flirted is not a nice one? My best friend is the kindest person I have ever met and she flirted back with men that she liked.

How on earth is a girl supposed to get to know a guy, if she doesn't talk to him?

And since when is flirting attributed to being a bitch?

Knowing you'll get hate for your opinion means you understand that it's rubbish and based on you and only you.
You're a sweet shy girl that hardly ever flirts because it's not within your nature and going by your own experience you chose to paint every flirtatious woman with the same brush. Since you don't flirt and you're a nice person, by default you decided that everyone who does isn't.

Flawed logic right there. You need to get out more and stop judging others based on your shortsighted preconceptions.

[Mesonfielde]

Thry might flirt, to be honest you can tell based on general behavior and tone of voice if someone is a "bitch", or at least just someone incompatible. Some people still flirt just for fun. Or to just go with the dating handbook. Who knows.

[ShutUpAndSuckMe]

You take life too seriously brah.. it's supposed to be like a ride at an amusement park, fun & scary~!

[=

[myTake Owner]

Lol well the 'house of horrors' is getting old. I wanna hit the 'fun house'. Damn I need more tickets...

[ricke92m3]

You should have told her she's a washed up cunt that no one thinks about unless they want a hole for their dick.

[lumos]

Why? What would that have achieved? If she really is that unimportabt, why waste time trying to hurt her pride?

[lumos]

unimportant*

[been_waiting]

Clearly untrue. Considering he liked her.

[MaskedSanity]

Ahh... the classic bitter response to rejection.

> "Hurr hurr girl u so fine", sexy, I want to be with you"
> *girl not interested*
> immediately insult her looks and devalue her being to a mere sexual object

Way to be a stereotype, bro.

[ricke92m3]

Lmao, I don't know how I've gotten through life thus far without your comments and unwanted opinions...

[Rebeccapizarrvas69]

Actually that's not true l am attracted to guys like you, but the girls that you chose seem like that they are not your type, your blind sighted that there are other girls that are willing to give you a try and love it when guys are like you but you just haven't found her yet but when you do then she will be your "It Girl- Jason Derulo" but in the mean time don't take things to seriously. Also just be you and plus honestly no body who cares.

[notverycreativeguy]

You're 14, you'll change your mind soon.

[Mesonfielde]

Don:t fall head over heels for a guy just because he brings you your coat, that is stupid. See into their behavior and see through their honesty, or lack thereof.

[Megalodon]

Soooo basically girls can tell your a pussy and bitchy women walk all over you because they can.

[Marihorror]

This.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5rZu-tBi7DM

[PhiOmega]

I don't know how this has anything to do with his story, but ok

[Marihorror]

@PhiOmega

If OP was really a "nice guy", he wouldn't expect anything in return for his kindness. He's claiming to be such a stand up guy while simultaneously complaining about how women don't want him. That's not how it works. As the video says, you don't get a cookie for doing what you should already be doing. Women aren't going to spread their legs for a guy because he's relatively friendly.

And if he stops being "nice" simply because he isn't getting laid, that says a lot about how genuine his kindness was in the first place.

[PhiOmega]

I thought the point of what he said was TOTALLY different

Apparently she was interested and flirting with him and then he made a nice gesture and she not lost interest, but disrespected him

He wasn't saying he was angry cuz he was nice and it got him nothing, he said he was going to change because she was a bitch to him specifically after the fact

He was getting something for being nice, laughter and criticism

[Marihorror]

@PhiOmega But that still proves my point. If OP was really a nice guy, he wouldn't flip out and vow to turn into an asshole the minute a girl rolled her eyes at him. Genuinely nice people are nice because it's who they are and because the like making other people feel good. Not because they expect anything (whether it be kindness or sex) in return.

P. S. I hiiiiighly doubt that the OPs story is completely true. He was likely misreading her "interest". I've met a lot of bitchy/weird women, but never have I heard of anyone getting turned off because someone handed them a sweater.

[PhiOmega]

Ok, it sounds like ur kinda asking for a saint now tho, how much shit is the poor dude supposed to put up with

That chick was a straight up bitch, she doesn't deserve anything

[Marihorror]

@PhiOmega lol she probably was a bitch, I'm in no way defending her. I'm just sick of hearing the whole, "women don't date me because I'm nice" line from guys who are probably not any "nicer" than the average person. It's a b. s. way of blaming other people for not being attracted to you instead of just saying "you know what, that girl didn't like me and was kind of a bitch, but that's her loss. I'm going to keep doing me."

If a guy is switching up his entire personality and demeanor just because of a woman, than it clearly wasn't his real personality to begin with. That's what it boils down to.

[PhiOmega]

I see what ur saying, but if I don't assume he's lying and i take his word for it

She was flirting with him until he made the nice gesture, then came at him offensively

And i don't expect the dude to be like jesus, I've gone out of my way to be respectful and kind to people id rather punch, but u can't expect him not to change. I mean if ut being nice to people and they only give u dhit for it, y would u keep being nice? We call that retarded irl, n if he kept doing stuff like that dudes would see him as a pussy being nice and letting people shit on him

[Marihorror]

@PhiOmega People are mean to me every single day of my life. Trust me, I'm a waitress working in a sports bar near a college campus. I've had things so disgusting/degrading/vile/mean said to me it would make Satan blush. But you know what? I'm not going to stop being a good person because of it. Who I am is not dependent on random mean spirited people. I'm not saying that he doesn't have the right to be bummed out and hurt by this woman's actions, but saying, "I'm going to be an asshole now" is totally not the way to go about it.

[PhiOmega]

Everyone kno's customer service sucks, but there's a difference between a job and making ur self vulnerable and putting your emotions on the line to have them hurt for however many years he's been going through it

When i hear this story, I'm empathetic towards him, i can't say I'd be able to do what he's done, or handle always being laughed at and disrespected

people change all the time (unless ur counting jesus, mlk, Gandhi)<cuz those are the only guys who always turned the other cheek, most other people, the revolutionaries are the ones who only take the shit for so long , but honestly, i don't encourage him to keep being nice, people don't deserve to be hurt all the time, EVEN IF that's who he is as a person, id tell him to stop, he has no reason to keep tasty up ^^^