Should you leave it to a girl to initiate after third date if you've initiated everything before?

Been on three dates with this girl. After everyone of them she texts me saying she had a great time etc. Its been pretty normal, flirting, kissing etc thats not my issue here. Last date I really went all out cooking dinner at my house with all the works. We've been talking daily since and have made plans for a fourth date but with no time on it. However she wasn't feeling well on Saturday so i know i can't be bothered to text people when im sick so just said il let u get some rest and il talk to you when your feeling better. We didn't talk yesterday. What would you do? I don't want to be the one initiating all the time and I think I've clearly showed her im interested. I know I could easily text her and arrange another date but i would like her to take the initiative and show me she's keen. So what im asking is does it necessarily mean that if she doesn't initiate dates after the third, is she not fully interested?

She text me literally as soon as I wrote this. I couldn't really text that night because I was working and the sickness was actually a sports concussion which I couldn't help with


Most Helpful Girl

  • So your normal routine was planning the dates and following through. Then you stopped. You were talking regularly, then you stopped - because she was sick. You texted back a statement- that you would continue contact basically when she's no longer sick. Why couldn't you chat or text I mean your usually at home alone when your sick. Based you time of day that could have been perfect even laughable. Offering a rub or support is highly appreciated at this time. If a guy did this to me I would feel like he's blowing me off. Not wanting to even hear my shaky voice. Like I discuss him. On top of that I'm sick umm now anger creeps in and second guessing about the relationship or dating starts. I can't think of any time being sick that a guy didn't ask to rush over and aid to me - not that I would let him but it's the thought. Also the last date was at your home are you sure it was 100. She may not want you to feel it was the last date that she decided to use the sick card. Which is very lame and unlikely from a woman. Sometimes we we text a little after so it's not obvious of are reason to Stop communication. But I don't think that's the case. This could simply be miss communication. She's feels pushed to the side and now you must make up for it. The longer you wait the more distant she will get. Or move on cause that's a lot of time. As long as she's saying yes then why not. some women like men to take control especially in the beginning that's when it's easy for us to say no. You had the green light you took it to yellow and now red it's up to you. I hope she waits for you since you made it to the 3rd date. I'm not sure you should count after that.

    • Well the injury was actually a sports concussion so I couldn't really help and I was working so couldn't really text. Anyway she text me as soon as I wrote this yesterday, and after talking I said if she wants to do something this week she can give me a shout

    • Perfectly put. You left the door open

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What Girls Said 3

  • I think she's either still sick or busy. Or she might think you're a gentleman and is waiting for you to initiate again lol. Personally, by the fifth date, (or if I really like the guy, the third), I start to initiate things. i mean guys go through so much pressure being the first to ask you out, talk to you, etc, etc. So I like to make my man's life a lot more easier and allow him to focus on having more fun and enjoy the date. Poor guys, society puts so much stress on you

  • A man always wonders if he's going to get laid. A woman always knows. If she doesn't want it your actions won't change it.

  • Maybe it's just because she's not sure if she should organise a date. You could probably wait and see if she tries to initiate one. If she really likes you, then she'll do it. Or allude to it, at least.


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