It doesn't matter whether you have sex with him on the first night or make him wait a year. If he wants to stay with you seriously, he will. I've waited a year and a half patiently before, (long story). just remember you have to find a mid ground because they all send messages. Too early is not necessarily good or bad but it does send the message that you like to rush things. thats not very good if you want an SLTR. Too far, like 6 months meanwhile wanting to go out on dates and all that makes it seem like a hostage situation, sends the message "As long as i don't have sex he will have no choice but to stay". He does have a choice, another girl who is confident enough in him to have sex with him and not think he will split. so he leaves and you are stuck thinking he didn't want an SLTR when in reality he was a hostage lol
When you are ready and handle the physically and psychological consequences of sex. Time is not an important factor for guys tbh. You can make a guy wait, but he could always be getting some somewhere else while you are controlling the access to sex. I've seen it. Plenty of girls who are sexually frustrated because don't want to give it up. Sex is mutual and should not be used as a bargaining chip. I. e you get sex after 90 days or 35 dates or whatever. Time can't be a major factor as to whether you have sex with someone or not
A lot of people will probably disagree with me but personally I don't put a time on it. I have found in the past that when I put a time on it, things went wrong. As that time approached I started to feel pressured and then the arguing started and it all went downhill. Now, I am a very firm believer in just going for it when it feels right. If the relationship is going to last it will do so regardless of whether you have sex on the first date or after 5 years! If he is the right guy, he will wait.
I waited almost a year because that's when I finally felt ready. A lot of people think that's a ridiculously long time, but at least I knew that he really loved me and wasn't just looking for a booty call. If he pressured me or left me for not having sex sooner, then I would have know he's not the one for me. If it's real love, he will wait and respect your decision.
You WILL KNOW AND FEEL precisely when the time is right.
If you ever need to ask... Then you are NOT READY.
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If you feel you're close and you've been on 4 dates, you might bet getting there. Have you seriously made out yet?
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