Okay so I'm clearly the most defective, hideous and unloveable person there ever was. I cannot do anything right. I try and try and try to be the very best version of me and nobody wants me. I am nothing to nobody. I am so tired of trying and being rejected. Does anyone have any advice on dealing with constantly being rejected or any words of encouragement because I am just so done with trying to mean something to anybody. Has anyone else gone through this much hurt? How do you deal with it?
Most Helpful Guy
You are obviously pretty enough to be girlfriend material judging by your profile picture, so it won't have anything to do with looks. Face, anyway.
That leaves a few things. If the problem is on your end, it will be either your personality or your mannerisms, but the problem could very well be on the other end, meaning that either you are looking for the wrong guys, the guys you like are at an age that they aren't looking long term, or they are not able to see the 'real you', which is probably a joint problem having to do with both presentation on your part and perception on theirs.
It can be difficult to give a solid answer when you are only able to hear from one side of the equation - you hear a lot of questions on here about people that worry about being single and describe themselves as being smart, beautiful, funny, kind, loyal, successful, fun and outgoing... and so part of the problem is clearly that their vision of themselves doesn't match the way other people see them, because if they were all of those things they wouldn't have the problem that they have. Maybe they get really clingy really fast, maybe they have some annoying quirks, maybe they get painfully jealous, maybe they get pouty when they don't get their way, maybe they are rude to waiters, maybe they never have anything interesting to say, or constantly cut you off in a conversation, maybe they don't have any interests or passions of their own or any strive towards personal growth. There could be tons of reasons why someone ends up rejected, a lot of them falling through the cracks that a person usually self-presents.
You are definitely not alone is suffering from a lot of rejection though.2
- Show AllShow Less
Most Helpful Girl
God I know exactly what you feel like. My life really just hit an all time low a while ago, die to the sheer amount of crap people were giving me. This is going to sound so weird, but music was my savior. I would spend hours every day in my room just listening to music because music wouldn't criticize me or tell me I wasn't good enough. Fall Out Boy taught me I'm good enough, that feeling worthless doesn't mean you are worthless, and someone will always love you for who you are, you just might not have found them yet. Pierce the Veil taught me that taking care of yourself is the only way anything will get better, and that hurting yourself hurts everyone. My Chem taught me I have to be myself, I shouldn't conform to what society wants me to do, and that no matter what I wear or who I like, it doesn't make me less of a human being or worthless. Thought I should share some lessons I learned, now that I'm much happier, and encourage you to find something, anything, that is like music was to me1
- Show AllShow Less