For years, i had been satisfied with my single life. I am not used to commitment. My best friend and i have messed around before, and everything was fine until i met my boyfriend.
We met through mutual friends and i was instantly head over heals. We dated for a few months before he travelled to Canada for a summer semester at university.
He's been gone for two months now, and a few nights ago i was with my best friend in his car, and we had a small makeout session. 2 hours worth.
i feel terrible, and i know this would KILL my boyfriend because he doesn't even like me hugging guys.
I would tell him if it was a stranger, but i don't want him to get uncomfortable and hurt whenever i'm around my best friend.
it's killing me, i haven't spoken to him properly since, and refuse to Skype. any advice is appreciated.
- YesVote A
- NoVote B
Most Helpful Guy
Was it really just "small makeout session for 2 hours"? Really? Are you sure that's all that happened or that you are willing to tell us? For 2 hours? I doubt you are telling us the whole truth and the full details here.
But it seems that you are interested in both your best friend and as well as your boyfriend. Attracted to both, but maybe more on the physical and sexual level for your best friend, other wise why'd you to make out for 2 hours?
If it's really just this one time thing, you should never do it again in case in ever becomes a habit in the future and then you run the risk of being suspicious of.
But sooner or later you will have to decide, do you have feelings for your best friend and your current boyfriend? Torn emotional attachments and feelings for 2 people, now that's going to be a difficult one, but you can really choose only 1 or the other. Unless they both can get along and don't mind sharing you exclusively together in a semi-open relationship of some kind, but that doesn't seem to be the case since you KNOW your boyfriend is not comfortable with you around other guys and potential competitors for your affection and attention.
It's really up to you. Tell him if you really want to, don't tell him if you don't ever want to. Take your pick, either comes with consequences. I think you should only tell your boyfriend when you feel the time is right and you actually feel you need to tell him about it.1
Most Helpful Girl
Right now he is probably really worried since you haven't talked to him in awhile.
If you aren't ready for a committed relationship, you should tell him because this will probably happen again and you will hurt him again. Alternatively, it sounds like your boyfriend may have some possession issues if you can't even hug your guy friends. Did this play a factor? With these cases you should still tell him and discuss what you both desire in the relationship... With the high probability for breakup. Trust is extremely important and you just broke that.
Alternatively, if you are totally committed to the guy you should still tell him what happened and explain it was a mistake and you just want him. You'll have to give up being friends with that one guy. You guys may stay together.
Either way, tell him the whole truth.
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