Low sexual satisfaction, hurting and depressing?

My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years now and we going smooth he's a nice and good guy but one big problem he's not good in bed at all. he's not even willing to improve, he ignores sex he doesn't like sex, he doesn't know how to even be romantic or do foreplays, he knows nothing. When we want to have sex all he does is gets on top of me with a lube and straddle for 1 minute and he's done. Weve never switched positions we've never tried anything new. Sometimes I try to take control and spice things up but he refuses, he just isn't good in anything relating to sex and his previous relationships failed because his exes kept sleeping with other guys and I'm sure this is the reason why. I've talked to him calmly, I've advised him, I've sat him down and talked deep with him, I've even threatened to breakup, I've done it all but nothing has changed and honestly I'm fed up. For 2 years I haven't been sexually satisfied it's not been easy. Im not a cheat I don't wanna cheat on him but this is becoming too much to handle. I don't wanna get married and start commuting adultery and I don't want to continue this way forever either so I'm asking your partner not being able to satisfy you sexually no matter what you've done to improve things is it enough to break up with him?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Hmmmmmm. This is a tough situation. My ex was the same way about me, i struggled to get her off but I always tried and was trying to improve and I got really good near the end. I was however hurt when she made it such a big deal in our relationship... because she was a sweet emotionally girl and a virgin and I was her first and I never expected her to be upset about something like that, but sexual fustration is very real and I guess is a reason to leave someone unfortunately. We did all kinds of crazy things, sex in public, online, made videos. Around the time I finally got good at getting her off we broke up for other reasons. Like I said tough situation but if you're not happy and he's making no effort to improve you can leave him, you're not married.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes, its enough to break up with him. Sex brings you closer, of course if you love him, and not being sexually satisfied can be frustrating specially if the other person isn't willing to improve, it shows they don't care about your needs. Sorry but you need to dump him if he can't keep up.

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What Guys Said 18

  • I'm on the literally same page as you. For me, it's been 9 years now in this marriage. Sex for me is only one sided and the stress related to it is immense and beyond what I can express with words. Since I'm in a married relationship, I cannot think of a breakup especially in a country like India. I feel horrible when it comes to sex, having no one to share this pain.

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  • You need to enlighten he's sex life.. Go buy somesthing that turns him on. Sounds like your not makeing it a fun activitie.. Thats the problem without a doubt.. Make yourself atractiv enough so he wants to fuk you the way you like it.. Or maybe he's gay n wants a but plug buy one of them for him lol

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  • I don't know of its enough to leave him but your comment about getting married and committing adultery is enough. If you honestly don't think he'll ever try then leave him, or just don't give him any for to years that way he doesn't get sexually pleased either

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  • Do you use condoms or no? cause that would increase his time. That's ridiculous that these mediocre guys get the hot babes lol i can fuck for an hour straight without a condom no problem lol

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  • Instead of texting here you should have sent him a breakup text and a long time ago too... How can you live like that for 2 years? I would have finished it in 2 months maximum

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  • Great sex is key to a great relationship if y'all don't satisfy each other or have sexual chemistry then y'all don't have a happy relationship and who wants to live unhappy life is to short for that

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  • You got to decide what its all worth to you. You can't force people to change as u seem to be finding out. Do the pro vs con chart take a piece of paper draw a line down the middle right Pro on one side, and con on the other then wright all the good things he does for you in pro and all the things like not good in bed ont the other take the two yeara you have been together and see if it has been good. Find if he really loves you. By how he treats you dont let sex be the make or break but its a big deal to you so still let it fall in the con

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  • Yes. Break it off now. If not, you will regret it everyday. Trust me on this... I know from experience.

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  • It's time to move he's a dumbass and isn't going to change

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  • Most women I've spoken to on this is just fine with a dud in the sack if his a good man..

    Hell it could be worse.

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  • Yes, in your situation with him being fully resistant to advice, ending it seems like the only way to solve the problem

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  • Stay with with never hurt his feel of love if u need sex satisfaction u can have sex partner to full ur need

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  • Thats rough, my wife was like that and it's difficult

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  • Run for the hills.

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  • Seek pleasure from toys or boy toys

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  • You should consider me..

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  • I was in a similar situation. My girlfriend didn't want to have sex that much. We were doing it very rarely, I was even thinking about cheating on her, but never did, never even came close. But it was all because I love her and I didn't want to break up with her. Anyway, I didn't break up, I gave it time, because I felt like there is a reason she's not in the mood, like I knew she has to have something on her mind that she don't want me to know. Turned out I was right, she was in a big financial troubles, she told me after over a year. I helped her and matter of fact I'm still helping her, but after she told me, everything changed. I think she doesn't have that baggage on her heart, because she finally told me about her problems and we're going to make it right together. She was afraid I'd leave her for that and couldn't get in the mood because of that.

    Not sure if it helps in your case, probably not. I think it is a valid reason to break up if you spoke to him and he's not even trying to change. Relationship is a mutual thing, you should care about him being happy, he should care about you.

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  • Experience should teach us, and it seems that he doesn't want to learn, so I think you should end the relationship and tell him that you did so because of sex.

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What Girls Said 1

  • That's a dealbreaker. You are 20 and seriously considering the next 60 years of life with no sexual satisfaction?

    No. There are better men out there. Dump his lazy, sexless ass and choose your own happiness.

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