He wants me to date his best friend?

[Blondie295]

1,5 years ago I was dating a guy, I still have feelings for but we stopped having contact by the time he met his current girlfriend. They've been a couple for 1,5 years now and for some reason I just can't forget him. Of course I met a few guys in the mean time but he's always in the back of my mind.

Yesterday I met him when going out and he was really happy to see me but he was constantly talking about his best friend & that I should date him because he's a great guy and so on..
I was really confused as I am interested in HIM and not his best friend.

Do you have an idea why he wants me to date his best friend?
I mean I wouldn't want my best friend to date a guy I once had a big crush on?

I hope you understand what I mean & I appreciate every opinion

[Raveagite]

It's probably as simple as it sounds. Just because it's completely not what you want doesn't mean it's not what he genuinely does.

Is take it as a compliment, if one I wouldn't want to hear, he thinks of you as a girl worthy of his best friend and someone he would like in his life indirectly and sees hooking you up as a good thing for everyone.

Tbh I would suggest turning all of that down and keeping him at arm's length maybe as a casual friend if you like at most because it's likely to just hurt you to try to be friends with him right now.

It's always painful when they are well meaning and clueless :/

[Blondie295]

Ohh thank you, that helped me a lot!!

I don't know why, but for some reason I still think/hope he might find some interest in me, even if he's with his girlfriend. I think it's a really unhealthy attitude.. I know. But do you think he's 100% over me?

[Raveagite]

I'm glad ^_^

It's normal to think about things from our perspective, you just got a bit caught up and didn't realize his.

Well, you aren't wrong, if he does take an interest in you and leave or cheat on his girlfriend what then? You've hurt his relationships helped make him a worse guy in some ways, even if he leaves her for you and does it as upright as he can it's still tough in someways and would he still be a guy you would respect?

But that's totally getting ahead of ourselves, like you said the question is whether he is over you.

And... :/ Sorry kiddo yeah, from what you've told me almost certainly. You don't try to hook up someone you have a thing for with your best friend unless you have a hole in your head or a deep and evil plot >_<

That doesn't mean that something in the future is out of the question, it's clear he does think you are a worth while person but I wouldn't hold my breath waiting and would try to use this as closure if you can

[Blondie295]

Thank you so much!!

[Raveagite]

You're welcome, you sound well down to earth and like your were just taken by surprise to see an old crush, I'm sure you will handle it well, good luck ^_^

[Guanfei]

Any guy wants the best for his bro. And he knows quite well that you're a quality girl. Of course he wants his best friend to be with you, he knows how nice you are.

[Nyxopheles]

Honestly I would say move on from this dude. You're clearly still hung up on him but it's bene a year! You're still young, go out and have fun before it's too late. I dont see why you can't date his friend just for the hell of it, but make it very clear you aren't looking for something serious.

Honestly if you're still hung up on this boy then you clearly need to work on yourself more. You might have been attached to this boy before but you need to be able to get back your independance before looking to start something new, otherwise, what's the point?

[thinker_]

avoid would be my suggestion

because it may become a mess that might hurt u emotionally

[Blondie295]

yes I'm not going to date his best friend.
but do you have a clue why he wants me to date his friend?

[thinker_]

seriously I can say
but you would have to give me details

[Blondie295]

When I saw him yesterday his girlfriend was with him as well, so I thought maybe he was talking about his best friend to have a reason to talk with me without his girlfriend being jealous?

I told him that I find it weird to date his friend when we had contact for such a long time in the past and he said "It was like 2 years ago and even if we had contact, we haven't been a couple. That you are really cute and pretty is obvious but I have a girlfriend now. So I don't see any reason why you shouldn't date my friend?" - that's what he said?

[thinker_]

I can guess why he wants you to date his friend but not sure

your reason seems appropriate but couldnt be confirm at least with this much info

was he forcing u to do emotionally?

how well do u know his friend?

[Blondie295]

So what do you think is the reason then?

I don't know his friend well, I've met him twice when goign out, but he seems really interested in me! (He wanted my number, to kiss me & he told me yesterday that he's happy to see me again)

[thinker_]

he kissed u?

when?

also from how long is he in friendship with him?

plus how close is he with him?

[thinker_]

are u good girl or can fake if u wanna know truth?

[Blondie295]

He wanted to kiss me yesterday but I didn't want to

It's his best friends since they are little children, so really close!

I want to know the truth

[thinker_]

and when was the first time his friend flirted (or gave u any signals) with you

[Blondie295]

Why? Half a year ago.. that was the last time I saw him

[thinker_]

then there has to be something fishy
because why he waited half a year if both of them were so close

[Decentguy]

Plot Twist : Im his best friend.