I owe my boyfriend money, is it bad I feel weird?

Reeree23
So when me and my boyfriend first got together I was paying off this Loan and I mentioned it to him just to moan about it and he was so shocked and insisted on helping me clear it - I immediately said no because i didn’t want to owe him money but he kept insisting it was better to get help from him than to have these loan people increase the interest on the loan (It was taking me a while to finish) also he didn’t want to date someone with debt because it would affect our future (getting a house etc). So after arguing and me crying I said fine and he gave me the remaining £1100 to clear my debt. I was super grateful and I really appreciated it because he didn’t have to do that at all, it wasn’t his problem. This is wrong of me but I kinda thought that I didn’t have to actually pay back all of it. I kinda thought, stuff that I’ve done for him since counted... like me paying for a holiday etc. But he’s brought up my repayments a few times now and I’ve just got my first job out of university (I’m 23) - it’s a contract job so I might or might not have a job in 8 months. (For more context he’s 30) This week, I said I was working out my budget and I was thinking I’ll pay him £50 per month towards this debt I owe him and put some in savings and put some towards. Clearing my student overdraft. He said, I don’t think £50 is enough because it will take 3 years for you to give it back to me. You have £300 left after bills therefore you can pay me back more. I said okay fine I’ll give you £100 per month. Since that conversation, I’ve kinda felt a bit funny - like, it feels like I’m dealing with a company and not my own boyfriend. He’s helped me and he’s been supportive of me being a student and I really appreciate him for that but a part of me feels weird about the way he’s being about it especially knowing that I don’t have a permanent job
I owe my boyfriend money, is it bad I feel weird?
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