In short, it's a really selfish thing to do unless the loose strings are tied up well back home. I can see how and why someone would do it, doesn't mean it is good. It is hard to sacrifice and go empty (if that's the perception of staying there with hopes of new love).
I agree. His kids will grow up hating him.He told me he had to leave Germany because once he got a divorce, he didn't have citizenship. Turns out that's not true. He has dual citizenship. He just chose me over them. He said that I "distorted" what he told me or that I misunderstood.
That just makes it even worse on him. OwO total red flags EVERYWHERE. Good god ma'am I'm not sure what to say about that other than I hope you see the signs...Don't be his second disaster.
I made a huge error in judgment. He's an amazing liar and manipulator.
Well time to start correcting that error. You at least got to see through the lies. Hopefully he will learn what happens when you lie. So many times.
He's still reaping the rewards of his lies about me. If you were to read them, you'd second guess everything you just said here. He's that good.
He gave me some story about having to leave there, which he later said that I misunderstood.
A little of both, darlin. But more of the wolf in sheep's clothing with this one.
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I agree with most of what you said except if he didn't want kids then hoping she'll never accidentally get pregnant not only once but twice obligates him to those kids. A man that doesn't want kids should get a vasectomy and a woman who doesn't should get a tubaligation. In my eyes having consensual sex obligates anyone because we all know that's how kids are made.
Yeah, I’m talking about some crazy situation where the man wasn’t intending to have children, but something transpired, perhaps out of his control, where the woman is all of a sudden pregnant with his child. It’s perhaps not realistic or likely what I’m talking about, but nonetheless I added it in. In all honesty, I agree with you completely. I’m pro-life, so i believe that you should take care of the child if you managed get pregnant, because that’s your moral obligation and because I believe no one gets pregnant by accident, save for nonconsensual circumstances (rape).
He has three children with her. He said the first one was a surprise and the other two were planned
Yeah, specifics do matter. In my opinion, most of these situations are perhaps either planned or known that pregnancy is imminent or likely to occur.
@EmbraceThePain you sound like a liberal. This made me sad.
No hero in that
Your comment is incorrect. Child support is awarded quite often to the other parent in shared custody arrangements. The 50/50 is irrelevant here. Its not based on percentage time with either parent but based off who earns less. So if parent A earns $150,000 and parent B earns $60,000 - the courts will force parent A to pat support to B to level the playing field.
He earned a lot less than his ex.
@spaceycowboy Since you are uneducated, odds represent the probability of an event happening. According to the How Couples Meet and Stay Together survey conducted by Rosenfeld at Stanford, 69% of divorces are initiated by women in contrast to 31% of divorces being initiated by men. This means that out of 100 possible outcomes, odds are that there will be 69 instances of women initiating divorce and 31 instances of men initiating divorce. Just in case you are not aware, 69 is a larger number than 31. Therefor it is more likely that the women initiated the divorce. Thus what I said is factually correct and what you did was talk out of your asshole. You’ve been humbled, go home with your tail between your legs.On to your next point if you can call it that. Clearly the question Sydney asked gave relevance to 50/50 nature of custody, therefore it is not irrelevant. Just because you don’t like the wording of the question, doesn’t mean she can’t ask it. If it were irrelevant to her then she would not have included it in the question and given it priority in the wording of said question. Thus you’re wrong twice in a row.
@spaceycowboy On your third inane rant. A 50/50 split means that each party gives the exact same amount of themselves. It doesn’t mean they arbitrarily split their input based on the whims of a bias judge. My points specific spoke to the bias in the court system that often discriminates against men. I’m aware of how child support can be split through a judge's order, and how that often doesn’t align with an even split. That was the entire point, but that flew right over your head just like everything else. There are tons of studies that back what I am stating, but even in her anecdotal case as she put it “He earned a lot less than his ex”, yet he was paying child support to her forcing him to take on a greater financial burden with less available resources at his disposal while simultaneously having an equal time burden. That’s unjust. Guess that’s three strikes. Go wipe your mouth with toilet paper, because all you do is talk shit.
I to have seen ex wives alienate their kids from their fathers. And I've seen men act just as bad. When it comes to divorce and child custody/support it's like the couple forgets they actually cared about each other once and don't behave in ways that are truly in the childs best interest. No parent should ever speak badly about the other to the kids. But their anger just seems to blind some.
Thank you for sharing your experience. ❤
Also how old are those kids? I thought that guy was at least 15 years older than you so the kids probably aren't that young.
That's not always true because when my bio mother left and my dad got me the lady I call my mother now stuck around and we've been a perfect family for 18 years
@mental_status Your anecdotal bullshit is irrelevant.
🤣🤣 great description
Literally the first thing that popped into my head. My weird haha
I appreciate your weird!
She didn't throw him out. He chose to leave. Are you unable to read?
Sounds like bullshit, what can I say.
He was in the same country but moved to a different country, away from them.
Oh right.I really dont care, children are overrated.A couple of hundred years ago no one gave a flying fuck about children, at all.Now everyone gets their panties in a bunch over nothing, its ridiculous.
The whole idea is ridiculous.The guy living in a different country could still see his children more than someone who was serving in the military but no one is going to come on here raging about how soliders are dead beat dads.
I'm sorry guffrus but serving your country is different from voluntarily leaving the country
@Imcmullan lolOf course it isn't.Its voluntary.
Using grandious language 'serving the country' doesn't change anything, its a job and doing that job is a choice.
At least the guy who just left the country will presumably survive, the solider may well get themself killled.So either abadoning your children in this way is completely fine.Or leaving your children is so awful that soliders are bad parents.You can't have it both ways.
He willingly left them. NOT serving his country
@SydneySentinel Read the whole thing you clearly didn't bother.
He didn't leave for a job to better his life.
@SydneySentinel Who are you to judge whether or not his life is better as a result of the choice?Maybe you should have phrased the question more honestly because this will be on the way to becoming a different question soon.I think I just reject your question, its not actually a question its just anti male hate speech or something.Because its so shallow.This could easily be a very good thing or a very bad thing or not particularly important at all.Really, the fact that he has changed country tells us essentially nothing about his opinion, atttiude or commitment to his children.We dont know anything about why and it clearly matters because you and ImcMullan seem to think that infact there are good reasons for even abandoning your wife and children in this way.So i will return you to one of my first comments, that the whole idea is ridiculous.Its a nonsense.
Dont bother having a point or making an argument just neg me and disappear. Pathetic.
You must have a job that allows you to be on the phone all day. You're also not my first priority. He abandoned his children and isn't making an effort to improve his situation so he can improve his kid's lives. Back to your second comment, you said you really don't care. Did you change your mind about that?
didn't change my mind, I still really dont care if someone decides they want to move to another country.I notice you still dont have an argument.
After is 4th question/mytake about me, I've had enough. I know I should be better than that but tonight I'm not.
You're right though. I appreciate your response.
You’re welcome 😊