Yep. Being rejected would be humiliating. Never trying is safer, because you don't have to be confident and ask someone out, only to be flat out rejected.
So you feel humiliated when rejected? By someone you don't know? This is the second comment that has said the same thing... just trying to understand... no hate here!
Well i feel we are taught the wrong things today. Just my opinion, that we are taught to run away instead of confronting/facing the things that are painful.
If your having a tough day, just relax for the day. Stressed out? Oh just go do something else or just don't do what stresses you out. Just some examples of the mantras that encourage stress avoidance.
Stress, rejection, failure. They seem so BIG, imposing and intimidating but they are just one way we learn. So long as we trained ourselves to accept it.
Case in point. One day my hot water and furnace both went out. I was looking at having no heat or hot water for 1.5 months at the earliest because there were no plumbers in my area due to projects and other stuff.
Instead of waiting I downloaded the manuals, bought the parts from home depot (instead of a plumber upping the cost) and had my system up in about 6 hrs. (Lots of stress and cursing, never cut copper pipes or etc. It was way stressful basically making a new system.)
I’d honestly rather have tried and been rejected than knowing I didn’t try and years later I find out we both wanted to try something. That would just bring new to a nostalgic sadness
Are most guys going up to complete strangers? I wouldn't know about that. I guess that a complete stranger could get really loud and make a scene. Usually the humiliations come from people who you know, or at least have regular contact with.
I always thought that going up to a complete stranger was such a surefire path to rejection. If you think about it, the person barely knows you. Why would they want to spend an evening alone with someone they've just met?
It is a sure path to rejection if you think you will be hanging out with that person all night. People deserve to be rejected if that is their mindset. You approach people, vibe with them and dip out... maybe get a number or come back later. You work the room you don't annoy people by wearing out your welcome.
Anyway I was just curious... thanks for the comments!
It depends on risk vs. reward ratio. If you are seeking someone that is realistically obtainable; i. e., someone within your league, it is better to try even if you get rejected because the risk vs. reward ratio is high enough. However, if you are average and seeking someone beautiful the reward vs. risk ratio is zero. Therefore, it is better to never try.
"However, if you are average and seeking someone beautiful the reward vs. risk ratio is zero." There are some women that don't go by looks alone and actually go out, have fun and marry these "average" guys so how can you say that the rewards would be zero? ? !
@SueAnon84 Because the rewards are zero. There are no women that don't consider looks. You can search the world over and you will not find a single example of a beautiful girl accepting an average looking guy unless he is extraordinary in some other area such as he has money, position (prince, CEO, etc.) is brilliant, a 5-star recruit, or famous. I realize there are cases where some people will say a guy is not good looking, but in every case, the guy has a good body and high bilateral symmetry--primary characteristics of good looks.
Rejection is like stubbing your toe on a table leg once, waiting for the mild pain to go away and then trying again. Never trying at all is like being electrocuted until your nerves are fried then the pain turns into numbness and you lose any sense of joy in your life.
The one thing worse then anything in the world is to not try or to not take action. The one thing you regret more is the things you never did then the things you have done. To stay silent is just as bad as take part of a bad thing. Rise up, speak and try and you done all you can.
I feel it's better to be rejected, cause in a way you got your answer and you'll never think what if.. a lot of people miss out on the opportunity at trying then go on to regret later on. The way I see it getting rejected means that person doesn't wanna waste neither of your and said person's time.
I used to think so, but guys have to learn how to deal with rejection at an early age or they might die a virgin. So we condition ourselves to deal with it and take more chances. Nowadays if I didn't at least try I'd be kicking myself.
Rejection can be worse than trying, but only temporarily. Over all, it's much better to try, and to fail. than not try at all. It's the old saying, It's better to have loved and lost, than not to have loved at all.
I don't feel afraid of getting rejected but still i hate to get rejected.. The what if part is the worst coz you will always keep asking yourself what if i did, or didn't, waited...
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Yep. Being rejected would be humiliating. Never trying is safer, because you don't have to be confident and ask someone out, only to be flat out rejected.
Simples...
So you feel humiliated when rejected? By someone you don't know? This is the second comment that has said the same thing... just trying to understand... no hate here!
Rejection is learning.
Never trying is just never trying and remaining stagnant.
It's true... many don't think this way though.
I apologize for the wordy response.
Well i feel we are taught the wrong things today. Just my opinion, that we are taught to run away instead of confronting/facing the things that are painful.
If your having a tough day, just relax for the day.
Stressed out? Oh just go do something else or just don't do what stresses you out. Just some examples of the mantras that encourage stress avoidance.
Stress, rejection, failure. They seem so BIG, imposing and intimidating but they are just one way we learn. So long as we trained ourselves to accept it.
Case in point. One day my hot water and furnace both went out. I was looking at having no heat or hot water for 1.5 months at the earliest because there were no plumbers in my area due to projects and other stuff.
Instead of waiting I downloaded the manuals, bought the parts from home depot (instead of a plumber upping the cost) and had my system up in about 6 hrs. (Lots of stress and cursing, never cut copper pipes or etc. It was way stressful basically making a new system.)
But now. I don't need a plumber. Lol
I’d honestly rather have tried and been rejected than knowing I didn’t try and years later I find out we both wanted to try something. That would just bring new to a nostalgic sadness
Sometimes, yes. It depends on whether or not the person doing the rejecting wants humiliate you.
Even if they do try... can a complete stranger actually "humiliate" you?
Are most guys going up to complete strangers? I wouldn't know about that. I guess that a complete stranger could get really loud and make a scene. Usually the humiliations come from people who you know, or at least have regular contact with.
When I think about "rejection" I think yeah complete strangers or people you barely know.
I always thought that going up to a complete stranger was such a surefire path to rejection. If you think about it, the person barely knows you. Why would they want to spend an evening alone with someone they've just met?
It is a sure path to rejection if you think you will be hanging out with that person all night. People deserve to be rejected if that is their mindset. You approach people, vibe with them and dip out... maybe get a number or come back later. You work the room you don't annoy people by wearing out your welcome.
Anyway I was just curious... thanks for the comments!
Most definitely not, how else can you improve your game without failing first.
Right on Jimbo!
"Met a girl over the net / Saved our conversations on a floppy diskette / It went well for a week or two / Then it all came unglued" -- She Blocked Me
Ha floppy diskette
Rejection is bad.
But here's the thing... let's say you want to go out with Girl X.
If you take an extreme example, you have a 1% chance of going out with girl X, and a 99% chance of being rejected.
If you never try you have a 100% chance of being rejected.
So it's better to try and be rejected than to never try at all.
rejection after rejection with no in between of acception can take a toll. but you can't be rejected without trying. so you're double fucked
absolutely not. that way you know the answer and you’re never left wondering what could have been.
Rejection sucks, but I’ll say give it a shot! If the person does reject you, it’s okay because their lost and you deserve wayyyy better.
Cool... thanks for sharing!
Knowing is always better than wondering what could have been. If anything it lets you move on.
It depends on risk vs. reward ratio. If you are seeking someone that is realistically obtainable; i. e., someone within your league, it is better to try even if you get rejected because the risk vs. reward ratio is high enough. However, if you are average and seeking someone beautiful the reward vs. risk ratio is zero. Therefore, it is better to never try.
"However, if you are average and seeking someone beautiful the reward vs. risk ratio is zero." There are some women that don't go by looks alone and actually go out, have fun and marry these "average" guys so how can you say that the rewards would be zero? ? !
@SueAnon84 Because the rewards are zero. There are no women that don't consider looks. You can search the world over and you will not find a single example of a beautiful girl accepting an average looking guy unless he is extraordinary in some other area such as he has money, position (prince, CEO, etc.) is brilliant, a 5-star recruit, or famous. I realize there are cases where some people will say a guy is not good looking, but in every case, the guy has a good body and high bilateral symmetry--primary characteristics of good looks.
Triying is better than never trying. Rejection feels horrible but you have to be strong enough and get over it. Chronic drinking helps forget😅
No, never trying at all is worse. Rejection is all part of the game. You'll never get what you want if you can't handle risks.
Rejection is like stubbing your toe on a table leg once, waiting for the mild pain to go away and then trying again.
Never trying at all is like being electrocuted until your nerves are fried then the pain turns into numbness and you lose any sense of joy in your life.
The one thing worse then anything in the world is to not try or to not take action. The one thing you regret more is the things you never did then the things you have done. To stay silent is just as bad as take part of a bad thing. Rise up, speak and try and you done all you can.
I feel it's better to be rejected, cause in a way you got your answer and you'll never think what if.. a lot of people miss out on the opportunity at trying then go on to regret later on. The way I see it getting rejected means that person doesn't wanna waste neither of your and said person's time.
I used to think so, but guys have to learn how to deal with rejection at an early age or they might die a virgin. So we condition ourselves to deal with it and take more chances. Nowadays if I didn't at least try I'd be kicking myself.
Rejection can be worse than trying, but only temporarily. Over all, it's much better to try, and to fail. than not try at all. It's the old saying, It's better to have loved and lost, than not to have loved at all.
I don't feel afraid of getting rejected but still i hate to get rejected..
The what if part is the worst coz you will always keep asking yourself what if i did, or didn't, waited...