1 mo

Ready to give up on dating. How can I go on dates when I have an eating disorder and every guy just wants to take me out for food?

Anonymous
I’m struggling big time. I’m 25, I’ve had an eating disorder since I was 14. It started as bulimia, then anorexia subtype and now mostly I eat super healthy but limit my foods to like 5-10 foods. I’ve been single for so long so each day I just eat the same and it’s been fine.
Now, I’m wanting to go out and date. I look healthy, I’m around a BMI of 18 (skinny healthy). I love food but I hate hate eating and the horrible guilt that consumes my head afterwards, not to mention the self hate and further restriction following eating anything outside of “my foods.” And I get terrible diarrhea if I eat normally now.

so. Met a couple guys. They want to take me out for food. One guy has two restaurants his family owns and they’re both fried junk food. He wants to take me to them. Another guy wants to take me out for dinner. I just feel like giving up and ghosting then even though I really do like them and we’re compatible but I can’t deal with eating junk 24/7. I can’t deal with being 5 pounds heavier when I’m trying to get thinner. I want to look nice for my dates and I can’t if I’m eating outside my range and get a pregnant belly look. I’m just so frustrated. I can only offer so many non-food ideas before they wonder why I don’t want to eat around them. And I don’t feel comfortable telling guys I just met “hey can we choose non-food options because I have an eating disorder” and I am not going to say I’m vegan because I am not and that would show later.
Please someone help?
Ready to give up on dating. How can I go on dates when I have an eating disorder and every guy just wants to take me out for food?
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