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I voted a woman should not chase because of the energy dynamics, and I’m a big fan of the duality between feminine and masculine energy and how it forms the foundation of energies.
Having said that, a lot of men nowadays are intimidated to make the first move for many reasons. First there’s the widespread feminist movement and no man wants to come off as harassment. Loads of men are also afraid of rejection and humiliation because like us, they’re human beings too. And finally there’s shy men who are just too shy to make the first move. I actually think it’s a red flag when a guy comes off too confident in the beginning, because if he had good intentions he should be worried about how he is being perceived.
I think that if a woman is interested in a guy, and he doesn’t make the first move, she should. But she should not chase. Dropping a hint that you’re interested is absolutely harmless and a lot of the time it’s a turn on for men. Having a woman who knows what she wants is attractive. But don’t chase. There’s that good old saying - never let a man tell you that he doesn’t want you twice. If he doesn’t want you now, he won’t want you tomorrow.
Except hints don't work. Because we don't know wtf you mean.
I’ll give you an example. When I was at university there was a shy guy and I knew he was attracted to me. We were doing a group activity once and he had to get some stuff from his car. I asked him 3 times if I could come with him to help him. Surely that’s a hint?
Well it wasn’t for him because every time I offered his face flushed red and he insisted it was alright. Also I’m 100% sure he had a crush on me so I don’t know why he was responding like this. But I didn’t chase...
@Alyssa11 Maybe his car was messy and he didn't want to be embarrassed by you seeing it and then thinking badly of him. Or maybe he had an old or cheap car and he didn't want you to see it because you would be unimpressed.
You have to think outside the box sometimes, my friend.
Or maybe he wasn't going to his car at all. Maybe he was going to the bathroom.
Or maybe you were turning him on and he had a boner and just needed to step outside a bit for some fresh air.
@Alyssa11 Yep!
For me I made the first move if I truly like someone even tho I'm kinda shy tbh I will make it known to him I like him I don't believe in guys should only chase
Opinion
30Opinion
Good grief, some of these replies make my head hurt.
If I see a guy I'm interested, I'm going to let him know I'm interested. However, I will NOT "chase" him! Chase implies it's a game you're playing, and I'm too old for that.
Why can't both genders actively pursue each other if they're interested? Why does the man have to initiate things all the time? A guy can like a woman, but not be sure if she's single or interested in him. Whereas if the woman makes it known she's into the guy, or better still, asks him out, he KNOWS her intentions from the getgo and there's no confusion.
Quit making dating so complicated and setting gender roles y'all- if you like someone, just let them know and go from there!
@AzzaBlue Scary isn't it? But yes, some of us are mature enough to approach AND ask out men!
No really, we exist. Trust me, a few years ago I asked out a guy I was interested in. Like cut right to the point. I got rejected, but... yeah!
It's just finding women there weren't brainwashed into believing the man has to do all the work to initiate a relationship or date.
When it comes to the initial interaction or first meeting I don’t think it matters too much. That part is just figuring out whether someone likes you or not. While I never had a problem initiating I’ve had girls initiate with me, and if I liked them I liked them.
I think women get rejected a bunch of times when they do this and they think that it’s because they’re women, but when you meet strangers you’re basically flipping a coin. That’s just how it goes for both men and women. Some people will like you, some won’t.
However after that point I’d say that it probably is bad for a woman to initiate for example going on a date. Most men if they’re actually interested will want to go on a date and make it happen. If he doesn’t that’s a sign of a lack of interest and you’re wasting your time.
I also think that it’s a big mistake to expect the guy to do all of the pursuing while she plays hard to get. I’ve met girls who played hard to get and it backfired on them because I took that as a sign of lack of interest, found a girl who seemed more interested, and then when they found out I’d moved on they got mad. But then like why would I try to pursue a girl who is ignoring texts and date requests and making things too much hard work when there’s another girl who seems more interested?
A woman should initiate if she’s interested, but not chase. If you like a guy, by all means let him know. Dropping hints is fine, however since many guys (and girls too) don’t always pick up on hints, it’s better to just say what you want (I. e. “I would like to get to know you, we should grab coffee sometime”). If he’s interested he’ll do it, if not he won’t.
I think many guys today are afraid to approach women due to the whole sexual harassment allegations issue, so it wouldn’t hurt us to let them know from time to time
In all fairness I don’t think men should be chasing either. If the other person made it clear that they’re not interested just leave them alone and move on to someone else
I need the option "women should chase"
Ofcourse men should too but the fact that there's an entire culture in dating based on females not making active choises on their partner seems to me that it implies the following.
Women simply arn't interested enough in men to do the chasing.
Women would allways have to suffer the attention from all the "wrong guys" rather than go for who they want.
Men would always feel unwanted and focus instead on career and power to have their way.
Etc etc.
I think both should chase. Being chased or someone taking initiative makes the other person feel wanted to a point sometimes its not a welcome thing but in relationships I think its nice to make eachother happy and feel wanted so it should be an equal kinda thing with the exception of bdsm sub and dom relationships because they obviously have a different standard gauged more for their liking.
I say that a woman can definitely show interest first and see how the guy responds and keep showing interest while she lets the guy take the reins. I think this works out because it lets both people prove to each other that they are interested and want to move further. In today's society, however, both men and women can approach each other. Either way is fine as long as they are comfortable with It ◡̈
B
I had some stalkers in the past and I rejected them not because of their appearance but their behavior. There was a chick with name Sabrina. I went to a party, she was there. I went to a friend, she was there again. Somehow she crossed my way always and everywhere as I had a tracker in my pocket. This wasn't so annoying, but her attitude while speaking with me. I told her a completely ridiculous story and I expected she will question my credibility, but she saw everything due her red infatuation glasses and ate shit out my hand. All my male friends didn't understood my behavior towards that girl, because it was something they dreamed about. She was indifferent for me, I tried to discourage her and she became more and more pushy. At some point I've got an aversion towards that girl.
Girls, if you see something you want, be bold and go for it. Don't sit back waiting for things to be handed to you. Why delay possibly being happy on principle or outdated concepts of relationships?
This is exactly how I feel! Stop with the petty games go after the man you want ask him out but wait for him to give the first kiss.
That makes sense
I’ve been approached by women quite a few times and it definitely helps me to notice them. I tend to be in my own world often so I won’t even pay attention to them 90% of the time so if they come up to me you’ll get my full attention.
Maybe if this was the 1950's I would say men should be doing all the initiating, but this is 2021.. It's all about equality.. Women should approach a dude they want just as much as they want guys to..
Girls are just as human guys, and have the same rights in trying to get what/who they want.
What does it matter who gets the party jumping long as you do
Take the chance as you never know what you can miss out on.
No, I do not. In fact, I have never heard of a woman's being arrested, beaten, or shot for approaching a guy she is interested in romantically.
No.
If a person should is interested, then I think she should pursue, regardless of gender.
If you like the dude, approach him. life is too short to keep waiting and it helps take some pressure of the dude as well.
Not at all. In fact if he reacts badly you dodged a bullet.
I don't think there should be any rules. If it's an equal relationship, then each person should have equal rights to initiate it.
It’s really attractive when a girl initiates contact or meetups or whatever
Why not chase?
Women hunted too when we all were cavemen, nothing wrong with that then.
Why would it be now?
DONT. CHASE. EVER.
Men tend to value what they have to work for, it’s in their biology.
Problem is guys don't want to come off as desperate which is why we don't chase much. If the girl seems uninterested then why would we chase
I think the man should initiate later he should stop chasing to make sure she is interested as well and him not being pushy.
Either of them can initiate depending upon situation
A relationship is not a one way street. So the initial interactions shouldn't be.
yes , women should just sit and look pretty , guys will initiate and choose
A girl shouldn't chase, but shouldn't run
Way too many girls remain single cause they run away before even trying him out
“Should”? A woman can chase a guy if she wants.
When she is hot and guy is also hot, both should chase each other
if you crushing someone shy why not flirt
We're in 2021, not in 1920s anymore. So, it's time they chase us
A woman can attract but shouldn’t chase.
I see no reason a woman shouldn’t initiate
Never was a fan of the dating process
C. Id love to see it happen more often.
No I think they should initiate.
Pursue who you want to until they say no.
sadly i don't see this ever becoming mainstream
Equal
Nope
nope
Women**
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