I have a boyfriend but have a crush on someone else?

Question

What do I do?

SteveSmith1985 · Accepted Answer

This is an easy one (to answer... not that it's an easy thing to do).

You need to break up with your boyfriend. I'm sure a lot of people will tell you something different. But... they're wrong.

To me, if you're in a committed, monogamous relationship, you shouldn't be getting crushes on other people. If you do. You should end that relationship.

If I were your boyfriend, I would want you to break up with me FOR SURE. I would be waaaaay more hurt if I somehow found out some other way, and my girlfriend wasn't the one to tell me.

So, I guess this one comes down to personal values and personal philosophy. To me, honesty is THE single most important thing in a relationship. Maybe you think differently.

Your best bet is to just reverse the situation. Say your boyfriend had a crush on some other girl... what would you want/expect him to do? What would be the "right" thing for him to do? That's where you find your answer. :)

Gosceewual · Accepted Answer

leave him, be with who u wanna be with, fuck societal and social rules, do what u want, its wrong to stay with someone u dont want jus to make him happy

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Are you and the boyfriend exclusive? How long have you been dating? What are your feelings for the boyfriend and any plans for the future?

SomeGuyCalledTom · Answer

Sever all contact with the crush, and realise on a very deep level that your temptations are a product of your own design. You only "catch feelings" if you first allow a situation to arise where feelings can be incubated. Remove yourself from the situation before the incubation is complete, and voila! It resets the count, and you can tend to your relationship, or otherwise end it altogether. Either way you'll have a clear mind and a clean conscience. This crush of yours will cloud your judgement and unfairly bias your assessment of your current relationship. When you're reaching for something new, the "old" always looks stale and dull and unfit for purpose by comparison. But if you just stop reaching, and actually just sit in quiet contemplation, and assess your relationship for what it actually *is* (and not merely assessing it in comparison to some amorphous idealised "other"), then you'll start seeing truthful answers to the question of your devotion to current boyfriend -- or lack thereof.

Kaneki05 · Answer

Well break up with your boyfriend or forget about the crush. Remember the crush can just be a typical i want what i can't have situation.
Longs if you do one of these tho and don't cheat. It's fair game what you do. Just there will be consequences to your actions like anything.
Personally i know myself, and that crush would be a mistake. It would be a want what i cannot have for sure. Unless if my relationship wasn't going so smoothly. But then it could be the fantasy of someone who appears would be perfect but then i see the flaws after i choose them.

Then there is the whole problem of do you really cherish what you have? if your thinking about someone else. Do you really love the one your with if having these thoughts.
I say someone could really love someone and make a dumb mistake.
But to stop that you really need to think hard and long about what is closest to your heart and what is closest to lust.

RawIronhide · Answer

Generally I'd say that your crush is the one you should pick because you must have more feelings for him if it's making you question your relationship. Use your best judgement.
Do you love your boyfriend? If not maybe it's best you try with someone els.

loveslongnails · Answer

Can you say " hello, hormones!"
And, obviously this crush has some qualities and characteristics which your boyfriend does not possess, and you want it all. And you want it now.

Sound vaguely familiar as to what girls accuse guys of doing, pretty much all the time?>

RHK36 · Answer

Leave your boyfriend and after some time try to get with the crush if you still have feelings. You should definitely not stay in the relationship you currently are in. It seems like you're over him, so why keep it going.

Anonymous · Answer

It's pretty simple a crush is just a petty feeling you might say. But it's when this crush moves to the next stage. We all got feelings but you got a boyfriend and if he makes you happy there is no point in throwing that away. My advice don't make a move until you're sure, you don't wanna be making a decision you'll later regret because it's gonna be something you have to live with.
So control the feeling and if you're happy with your current boyfriend stick to that and continue being happy.

Anonymous · Answer

The grass is NEVER greener. You are crushing on the “unknown” you are building a fantasy in your head.  If you monkey branch, you will just fuck up what you have that is good.

slatyb · Answer

Maybe you should break up with the boyfriend. If you were really happy with him you wouldn't be thinking about dating someone else.

TommyMountainFigure · Answer

First thing you do is take your photo off. when asking that question. If he sees it you're toast.

REALSTEEL · Answer

Do what your ❤ is telling you what are your feelings telling you the main thing is long as your happy that's all that counts

Wise4myage · Answer

Out of fairness to your boyfriend, if you can't control this crush on the other person, than maybe its time to move on?

alexanderdelarge7 · Answer

you are doing well. your beauty should be shared everyone.

ayomanwya · Answer

You have a boyfriend so there’s really nothing else to say

Luckycharms12 · Answer

To choices forget about your crush. And be with your boyfriend. Or break up with your boyfriend.

Shy_Steve · Answer

You are better off breaking up with your Boyfriend.

ItsMeItsMe1989 · Answer

doesn't that then prove that guys and girls can't be "just friends" LMAO

Guanfei · Answer

You will just give up on your boyfriend anyway, sooner or later. So, better end this quick.

Titlover01 · Answer

Stay with your boyfriend. And just have sex with your crush.

Romeocuck · Answer

Be honest with your boyfriend and tell him about it

pigoat · Answer

dump your boyfriend and get with ke instead

Yellovv · Answer

Do you think to make sex with both?

rapfan107 · Answer

Normal just dont act in it

lycanthrope3 · Answer

Follow your heart

scott04sa22 · Answer

Dump the boyfriend

jahaims · Answer

Leave your boyfriend

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