Girlfriend doesn't love herself no more and doesn't see a future with me?

[munanyo]

my girlfriend and I been dating for 2 years. I felt like covid play a huge part of our relationship struggles due to not able to go out and activities besides outdoors stuff. She's been very busy with her life in college she's about to graduate 2022. lately she always gets irritated on everything I do or always stress out. She wanted to break up multiple times and we both decided to just date without worrying about the future because we still enjoy each other company. She told me to try to change her mine and see were it goes. A month later she finally told me how she feels. She told me she doesn't love herself, hate the way she looks. She wants to deal with her problems on her own. She did mention that I'm not the issue too. She recently gain a lot of weight. Her sex drive went down a lot too. But then again she said us breaking up eventually just gives her more stress due to not seeing a future with me. We broke up that day but she still wants us be friends and text me to hangout the day after. I do care for her but that shit hurt me a lot and I confuse on what to do.

[OlderAndWiser]

1. When people are in college, they sometimes undergo some period of self-examination that leave them feeling unhappy. It is also an age at which endogenous depression may begin to express itself.

2. She wanted to break up multiple times. Whatever motivates that, it seems to be persistent. Do you have any reason - other than wishful thinking - to think that will go away over time?

3. She wants to remain friends. Know why? That lessens her guilt over breaking up and it keeps you on the hook in the event she once again changes her mind about the break up. In other words, it suits her needs, but not yours.

4. You can stay with this girl but you will probably be going through the same turmoil with her 2-3 years from now. How many years do you want to devote to her before you say "It's time to say goodbye, move forward, and find someone who wants me as much as I want her?"

5. Remaining friends with an ex is horribly counterproductive. You will keep hanging on to a hope that will likely never materialize, and you probably won't even begin to look for someone else. If you do look and find someone else, how will she feel about the fact that you still spend time with the ex who was the love of your life?

You need to decide what your goals are, decide whether this girl is going to be a part of reaching those goals, and then do what you need to do to accomplish your goals.

[munanyo]

number 2: Yea the one thing that gets her angry is when I act like my facts always right or being stubborn on opinions during normal conversation.

[OlderAndWiser]

If you wanted to change that about yourself, you would have already done so.

[noohair]

I learned that I have had very little success changing a woman's mind, specially if she said she thought about things and made a decision.

[Avicenna]

She's also going through lots of life changes, so that might also be a factor. Just do your best to be supportive.

[Iron_Man]

Take her to counseling

[In_Trance]

move on