Not feminine enough? Are masculine women dateable?

[Anonymous]

Im a 20 year old woman, never been in a relationship with a man and now that im older I'm starting to think something is wrong with me. I've never enjoyed girly things, I've always thought of fake nails, hair extensions, makeup, and certain clothes to be inconvenient. Not comfortbale, or practical to real life. I wear baggy graphic tees, and jeans with sneakers. I wear a lot of hoodies and leggings as well. I don't wear makeup or style my hair any special way. I NEVER "dress up" or put any extra work into how I look. I don't like fancy things, im not materialistic at all. Id like to think of myself as simple. But am I too simple? Am I not enough? All I ask for in a relationship is communication, honesty, patience, and lightheartedness. I could love someone even if we were homeless. I never ask for anything because I don't need anything. Maybe that's why I'm still single? Because I don't really need a man, I don't need to be spoiled, or need attention. But it would be nice to have a partner... it would be nice to share my world with someone because even though I enjoy being alone, I think having a person to share myself with would be amazing. I don't want to change myself to become "dateable". It isn't like me to wear dresses, and makeup... or present myself in a feminine way. But im afraid that will only leave me to be alone because men typically want a feminine woman. Appearance aside, I have both feminine and masucline personatlity traits. I am self-reliant, like to work alone (independent), I am protective of my people, and when I see something that doesn't sit right with me... I say something. I'd like to think of myself as friendly, I have HORRIBLE rbf so it can scare some people away. But once I'm approached I smile and try to appear as open as possible. I have a very senstive side to me, motherly and nuturing side. But only my people have witnessed that part of me. Thoughts?

[t-8900]

Well like others will tell you your appearance is your "foot in the door". You have to remember that for a lot of men it takes hella courage to ask a girl out. Sometimes they weight weather or not it's worth the hassle. You have a lot of women out there who are masculine that are hurting your chances because they tend to come with attitudes. As far as motherly goes. Are you a single mom? that too can play a huge role. You might come off as a lesbian to men too. Have you tried asking a guy out before? Have you tried flirting? Would you date a more effeminate man? Some of them like girls like you. I used to have a huge crush on this one tomboy back in high school but she did still wear eyeliner and blush.

[Asker]

I understand, I don't dress to impress haha. So it makes sense that I don't catch any guys attention. Yeah I think thats a pretty sad sterotype placed on masculine women; that we come with an attitutde. I personally don't waste my energyon being vicious or snarky. It's easier to just be kind, and reasonable. I will say I have dark humor, and can be sarcastic and play fight quite a bit. But its always warrented and lighthearted. I'm not a mother, but I did grow up having to be a mother to my cousins. I had a rough upbringing, so a lot of my masculine energy stems from my childhood and having to be strong for myself and for my family. With the way I present myself, I most likely do come off as lesbian. I'm a tomboy for sure. I have asked guys out before, made the first moves and initiated things. I know it can be hard for guys to do that, so I figured I'd give it a shot to relieve some of the pressure. I personally don't mind being rejected so it's no problem for me. I can be a flirt for sure lol, sometimes without even realizing. I just naturally have a playful witty vibe to me so yes... I do "flirt" quite a bit. Which can be a bit misleading at times, but for the most part it's never been an issue. I dont have a prefrence in men, I have found myself attracted to all types of guys. I'm able to create a balance in energy when connecting with people. For example: If im connecting with someone who is more feminine, then I am able to level that out and be more of a masculine energy. If a person is more masculine, I'm able to be tap into my feminine traits and be more soft, emotional and nuturing.

[t-8900]

I mean it sounds like you have a lot of traits that even I would like in a partner. But it comes down to the difference between how others perceive you vs how you perceive yourself. And by the way you dont have to get all glammed up and shit. A little blush works well because in the biology of men it makes you look more fertile same with lipstick though it's not always necessary. For me I do have a bias for some eyeliner in the mix. I don't know why but it kind of drives me crazy. How do you wear your hair? And can you show me these hoodies and pants you wear? If you dont feel comfortable showing your face you dont have to but maybe I can give some advice speaking as a guy who has liked tomboys in the past? I don't know its up to you. PM me if it makes you feel better.

[Asker]

Yeah, that's the thing. I don't think my personality is an issue, it's just the first impression that puts people off. People assume im lesbian or just don't see me as attractive because I don't dress or present myself a certain way. And 100%, I agree. Also beauty is subjective, and everyone has prefrences. I acknowledge that. Some days ill wear mascara or shape my eyebrows a bit, other days its just curling my lashes and chapstick or lip gloss haha. Ill try blush, It seems easy enough to apply. My hair is naturally wavy/curly. It does whatever tf it wants... and it can be annoying so I put it up in a bun and leave some curls out here and there. Or I straighten it in an attempt to tame it lol. My hair is midlength, and when straight I do either a middle or side part. Nothing speical. I'd love some advice! I can PM you, I think I have to level up first though. So let me figure that out then ill shoot you a message. :)

[t-8900]

were you the one who just recently followed me? If so I sent you a PM. you should be able to respond to it.

[Asker]

yes I messaged you back lol

[Ceslovas]

If you 'look'like Man is one and if you 'act' like Man is another one.. are you both of that? if it's not that then What is masculine women to you when?

[Asker]

I don't look like a man, I have masculine personality traits though.

When I talk about masculinity, I mean masculine traits like:
Dominant
Strong
Independent
Assertive
Brave
Innovative.

Those are all considered masculine traits. Femine traits are:
Emotional
Collaborative
Nurturing
Vulnerable
Caring
Humble

I have both, but my masculine traits are more prominent in my personality. I don't use my feminine traits as commonly as most women are "supposed" to. They are basically second nature to me. Hope this clears the confusion.

[Ceslovas]

I feel what you say... now

[Ceslovas]

It makes perfect sense... thank you:)

[Ceslovas]

But I think it's more to it...

[Ceslovas]

It's not always a traits:) It about a looks, too

[Ceslovas]

Just by looking at someone's face it's possible for a keen & experienced eye to know what's going on an inside:)

[Ceslovas]

Ofcourse it is not about visible what is really matter is invisible... it's not about me or someone else giving you right answer. It is never about us. It's about you on an inside:)

Questions gives u an insights about real you.. if u open enough and seeking for understanding.. answers are always on an inside on feeling level... things that energetically generates so called 'vibe' to an external

I would say more what i sense (see) in you but what you really need is something else...:)

[Asker]

This is the kind of reposnse I think I needed. You are exactly right... thank you.

[Ceslovas]

We can't give more than we are. If you need love in your life.. seek for that:)

[Avicenna]

It's hard to say without seeing you and talking to you, but I wouldn't assume you're undateable.

[Asker]

Fair enough, that makes sense. :)

[ChiTown33]

Lol you're 20. Ask again when you actually have a problem.

[Asker]

I can't tell if this is a joke or you're actually being serious but im gonna say what I wanna say reguadless. It doesn't matter if im 20 or 200... there is no correlation between age and having 'valid' life problems. This question that I asked here by the way, isn't a problem of mine. I was asking for thoughts on men and if they view tomboys/masc women attractive so don't get your panties in a bunch lol. You don't know me or what i've been through, and I don't know you or what you been through. You must've been through a lot though if you're this bitter to random people. You're 45, shouldn't you have matured by now? Im 25 years younger than you and know not to go around making blind and harmful assumptions about people.

[half_spirit_k]

Let me say this… I think I’m probably about a 50-50 on the masculine feminine balance. However, if I am with a very masculine man, I will become more feminine. If I am with a more feminine man, I will become more masculine. Don’t worry so much about labels, as things are actually quite fluid. Instead focus on what and who makes YOU happy, and it will just be natural. And there are lots of men who go crazy for more masculine girls just by the way!

[Z1pTD]

I mean my sister never dated before 29 and she thought she must be unattractive but now she's married happily. id just just keep waiting. She said it was worth it

[Nik1hil]

Didn't read whole...

You are tomboyish..
Guys do like that..
Just be approachable..

[Jayplays900]

A masculine woman is literally the best type of woman, especially when their motherly and caring.

Amazing.

[anylolone]

Don't think that's the reason. Could be true because you are young.

But I suspect you don't display much interest.

[Nick2456]

I am a guy who is quite feminine... so I would love to talk to a masculine girl... and even date her if she agrees!!!

[Anonymous]

i am not attracted to men or masculinity. does that answer your question?

[Asker]

It doesn't answer my question haha but I appreciate the response anyways lol.

[Opinion Owner]

they dont have anything that I am seeking, so they aren't dateable for me

[Asker]

Ohh I see now! That answers my question. Understandable! :) Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

[Dinosaursandanime65]

You sound very dateable. RJA x3 1

HRYAA ~ _~

[Ceslovas]

Yes, she does.. sound interesting... it made me wonder how she looks like... now

[Inthecraphole]

I am almost 27 and never had a real girlfriend. I seek a woman like you, so me and a woman can be each other's first loves.

[Tstrbrainer]

Are you dateable, apparently yes. You sound like a nice person.

Will you get a fair chance or attention? That's difficult

[half_spirit_k]

Don’t speak for everyone, there’s all types out here with different preferences :)

[Tstrbrainer]

Maybe

[Jamie05rhs]

You seem pretty cool to me.

[Asker]

Ahh thank you! ☺ Made me smile.

[Jamie05rhs]

You're welcome! :)

[Iron_Man]

I would have to see pictures

[Asker]

pictures of me? or?

[Iron_Man]

It doesn’t have to be your pictures it can be off of the Internet random pics of a muscular girl to see if they’re pretty or not And still feminine looking

[Asker]

Ohh okay! I dont know how to send pictures on this site. I just joined today lol.

[Iron_Man]

Private messaged me or follow me put the pics in your profile for like two minutes for each girl and I’ll tell you what I think after

[Asker]

We are now following eachother but sadly I can't DM you... you'll have to DM me first. My user is zzombies.

[In_Trance]

they're not for everyone

[Asker]

That's understandble. :)

[Anonymous]

Maybe