What's the best way to deal with rejection?

Question

I've been talking to this girl, at first she seemed very interested but confusingly she done 180 and I think I'm looking at rejection?

NicoletteXO · Accepted Answer

Ok, I am looking at all this advice you've been given - and it is terrible!

Try this: actually be honest.

Something like, "hey, I noticed you're not responding to my messages like you used to. I was really enjoying our connection and was looking forward to getting to know you better. Is there a reason for the shift in your communication?"

Within 24 hours you will know EXACTLY where you stand with her, with no room for doubt or error.

If she responds immediately and with reassurances or apologies/reasons, she likes you. In which case, take the opportunity to ask her out on a date.

Alternatively, she won't bother responding at all, or will take ages to respond, or give you some lame lukewarm response. In which case, she's not interested - and she's also immature. Leave it at that and do something which makes you feel good or is comforting, to get over it. That might mean working out, getting into nature, or eating comfort food, having a drink/smoke or chatting with a trusted friend or even counsellor. Whatever you need. But don't bother chasing her after this.

Another possibility is that she will tell you directly she is no longer interested, and will explain why. Maybe it's because you did something offensive or hurtful that you didn't realize. If that's the case, take the opportunity to rectify it. Or maybe she just lost interest for a reason outside of your control. In which case, at least you will know - and then, just leave things be. No chasing. All the best!

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Her lost, she was clearly lying to herself how much she loved you. Move on. Your a great guy. If she wants to be with someone who will mistreat her let her.

TruthBringer · Answer

If you have to ask yourself if you're facing rejection, then you're most likely facing rejection. A woman who is seriously into you isn't going to make you question whether or not she likes you. It would be as clear as daytime. A woman who is into you will work to get with you. A girl who shows interest in you and then turn a complete 180 is usually trying to get entertained until the dude she is actually into comes around.

Well, since we managed to point out that the girl isn't into you, the only thing you can do now is leave her in the cold. Try your luck with different women. Just as others pointed out, don't put all your eggs in one basket. If you talk to multiple women, it wouldn't really matter if one or two stop talking to you. Drop the scarcity mindset. This girl isn't special. And neither are you special to her.

There are two outcomes that will happen if you decide to stop pursuing her:

1. She comes back asking what's wrong and tries to reel you back in for constant validation like all of her other simps.

2. You will never hear from her, but you gave yourself the opportunity in finding someone who DOES want to get to know you.

It's time for you to forget her and get to know other women. While you're sitting here thinking about her, she is probably getting plowed by some other dude.

Miristheiss · Answer

All your eggs are in one basket.
Meet and talk to several girls.
Go meet some other people and ask out some other girls. This can be one of the girls you are talking to but if she drops off you just forget her and go out with other ladies.
You aren't even really dating her at point? You are just talking to this girl?
You aren't exclusive then. Instead of making her the one and only option in your life right now get busy and make it to where she is one of 2 or 3 or 4 options and then you can get exclusive with someone after you've gone out on several dates and you both click and have chemistry. Until that point give yourself options.
Rejection hurts more when that is the one and only option you have in your life. All your eggs are in this one basket. Even if she is your favorite option, if you have other options it doesn't sting that much when one of several options drops out.

paradiseonearth93 · Answer

Don’t take it personal. Everyone is just trying to find someone they feel is their best match. I look at it as they’re looking for an orange and you’re an apple. Or they love white wine and you’re red wine. So, no matter how perfect/great whatever you are, they’re looking for something else and it has nothing to do with your qualities. It just means you aren’t the right match. But also this depends on how much you have been talking... like if you met on a dating app and she flirted a little and then stopped, that’s not rejection.. that’s just something on her end and that can’t be taken seriously at all. But if you’ve gone out or know each other in person, then yeah I’d go with the above advice.

lightbulb27 · Answer

accept it, learn what you can and move on quickly. if it hasn't been that long, give her another run or two and see if can figure out what's going on. women aren't emotionally as stable as you'd like to think, they have a lot more options than you'd like to think.

maybe her "run" is really fear of love and commitment and other junk that can be worked through.

But either way, it means there is work to be done, right?

Don't sit around sulking how perfect she was... she was the one, how can I live without her, must be something terrible about me (maybe there is, that's the learning and growing part). But no... she isn't perfect as she is in our imagination. you'll be ok.

edgey · Answer

Sorry to hear this, we've all been there man. My suggestion: Respect her decision, and don't spend too much energy trying to understand why. Instead, put that energy into making yourself awesome.. Start lifting weights, or learn an instrument, or develop a new skill, transform that pain into triumph. You will realize that developing new skills might make you more appealing to the opposite sex, and you will have higher self confidence from gaining the new skill or reaching your next level.

I wish I learned this at a younger age myself:

Don't dwell in the past, level up your future! gl!

fr44c3iqqs · Answer

Here is one thing. Expectation leads to disappointment. But, you also need to research for methods to impress her and to make her want to come at you, and there are even a few methods to motivate her to make the first move. I won’t mention it in detail because it will be too long and not as well explained as the things online, so you need to make your own research if you want to really get her. You need to be able to impress her even better than any guy is out there. But do definitely go slow if using impression methods.

pillingsadness · Answer

If I'm being rejected, I throw myself a one-person pity party (okay, I make my dog participate), then I spitefully act like it doesn't bother me because I'm too cool to be hurt by something so common

Learn from the situation. Be neutral and take a long, hard look at your relationship. Try to discern whether you might have done anything to bring upon the rejection. Ask yourself if you were coming on too strong, or if you perhaps didn't give him enough attention.

BeenThereLovedIt · Answer

Learn from rejection. Reflect on yourself and what you offer to a woman (security, comfort, etc..) because just offering your undying love and commitment isn't enough. Improve your life and you improve the way females see you. Grooming and clothing is a good start. Being financially stable is another. Beware of gold diggers.

jshm2 · Answer

It's not a negative, and you should not take it as that.

Instead it's something you were just not a right match with. Look at it this way, if you'd been "accepted" and had to endure a month of shitty behaviours and gaslighting, you would be feeling far worse than you are now.

Hence don't think of rejection as always something you've missed out on. But a bullet you may have dodged.

EQisKEY · Answer

What they are rejecting is the archetype of the unknown in the form of all their fears mapped onto your face.

They never even really met you, so find solace in not taking it personal and see if the next one has been less tainted by all the bad apples that seems to have ruined it for the rest of us😤

InferiorElegy · Answer

Accept the rejection and move on, that's all you can do, do attack them verbally or physically that just makes you look bad. Other than that I don't know how to handle rejection that well and so I avoid it because it got to a point where being rejected was causing me physical pain.

Vikkrram · Answer

You chat with that girl... just ask her that what you have done wrong that she is behaving like this? And if really you did anything wrong, then appologize her and if she really don't want wid you then try mooving on buddy.

ShadezMcgee · Answer

Just tell her if she changes her mind to give you a call, then move on. It isn't fun to be rejected bud, but it's better to move on and keep sanity than to obsess over one woman that decided to ghost you.

pleaseloveme · Answer

Rejection stings but you have to put your ego aside and move on.  Dont dwell on what you coudlve done differently and definitely dont put her on a pedestal. Her loss. Move on you'll find better

RawIronhide · Answer

What do you mean? You just go about your own business.

DizzyDesii · Answer

Just think of all those who dont reject you. Give them a chance instead if you’re attracted to them in return

VanillaSalt · Answer

Understand no woman that wants you that you want will let you question where you’re at in the relationship. Walk away.

Mofunfour20 · Answer

Change your perception. Everyone isn't supposed to like you or align with your purpose. Accept it, move on and have fun

Crazygal2021 · Answer

She might be playing hard to get. Or she may have her guards up if she’s been hurt in the past…

exitseven · Answer

I used to make a joke out of it. I used to say that I was good with rejection because I had a lot of practice.

kaylealealea · Answer

what has she done that makes you feel like she's going to reject you?

lorenzomichael · Answer

Listen if thats the case you dont deal with it. Thats the point you get over it and start over agian looking in someone eles direction.. Unless you caught feelings then all I can say it poor baby.

Deserter · Answer

Everyone gets rejected, including her, it's not your fault. Just move on, for the love of God don't try to be friends with her, you'll only get hurt in the end

scott04sa22 · Answer

Rejection expert here. I get rejected all the time. I’ve been rejected just about everything you can think of and I will say yes… yes… and yes…

noohair · Answer

In my experience, once a woman makes the decision against you, I move on, it is just more pain to try to fix things.

MrJMM · Answer

By not giving a shit about that rejection or realizing it might be for the better.

Jayplays900 · Answer

Well, I can't really give advice since all I do is enter into a state of isolation. I'm basically 1600's Japan for a couple days.

Shiningtempest · Answer

@lemiaofchampions Best way to deal with rejection is to have zero emotional attachment.

EssenceOfLight · Answer

Rejection hurts less if you're rejecting from time to time.

Better_off_here · Answer

i guess try not understand that women are confusing and it is not always you sometimes it is about them.

lisapisatisa · Answer

just move forward and move onto better things! you'll forget about it soon enough

Julious0202 · Answer

if she doesn't want you, someone will want you, get over it

MzAsh · Answer

Cultivate an abundance mindset.

MCheetah · Answer

Junk food and funny movies/videos.

hahahmm · Answer

Celebrate. Odds are that she's doing you a favor.

MrSwisher · Answer

never talk to her again and move on

Floppy2112 · Answer

The tried and true method is to drink too much.

Den1971 · Answer

Move on... Bigger fish to fry and eat 😂😂😂😂

red324 · Answer

Don't get attached to begin with.

kelsiefire · Answer

just dont take it personally and move on!

Jmmmfi4 · Answer

Tell her to eat shit and die slow

Asianguy123 · Answer

she is probably gold digger or wh$ore. who cares?

Drzen · Answer

Get gym membership

This_Is_My_Opinion8 · Answer

Not giving a fuck.

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