To the men in the 30's and 40's, why dating\marrying a woman your age is a turnoff?

[Anonymous]

Like I'm a woman who turned 30 about more than a month ago.. And the fact is that I don't want kids and love my job a lot cause I'm good at it and earn money doing what I love the most. I love my materialistic life style and I like sex a lot. I may be 30 but I know for a fact I won't ever want children and would love to continue doing my job and living a child free life... Surely there are girls who are in the 20's who are like me but are simply just younger and prettier? Not sure if they want kids or not... So what is wrong with a girl of my age? Like if the guy doesn't wants kids and all that...

Updates

+1 y

And please no nasty comments or anything that is discriminating towards a woman and her age. Thank you.

[Anonymous]

Well, girl this is the wrong place to ask this question, as there are lots of misogynistic, ageist, sexist and close-minded men, incels, losers and pedos here. Most men on this site claim that women past a certain age are used-up goods, that they look like hags, have had too many casual relationships with guys or that they can't have kids..

None of these statements are true. Each individual is different. There are lots of women that look way younger than their actual age and 20 y. olds that may look like they're in their late 20s. Also, there's lots of misinformation out there about sexual health in general. I suppose there is increased risk with age… but… I mean… over 30 is NOT where that increased risk really has legs to run on… Over 40? Yeah there’s risk, but with the right medical guidance, it’s possible, and getting better as medical knowledge and help advances. 30+ is actually the most common age group among women to have kids in the U. S and Western world. My mom is at 34 and I turned out to be alright.. Anyway, you shouldn't worry about this stuff.. Men, who think like that and would reject someone cause of their age, are losers. Normal, educated and highly-successful men (like Bill Gates, Zuckerberg or Evan Spiegel) actually prefer women their own age. I would never date a guy with this mentality for sure and this is coming from a woman under 30

[Slartybartfast]

I stopped even trying to date after 30.
Remember dating fir a guy, just getting a date is like a full-time job you pay to go to. .. it's often humiliating, it's extremely risky, it's very expensive , and it's no fun at all for us at all.

And this is from a tall attractive and outgoing guy. If I was short or introverted I'd never have dated at all.

Once I hit 30 a few things happened
I owned a home and didn't want to lose it.
Women my age , aged poorly, most getting fat. .
Most good women. Have settled down and married by then.
Many already had children.
Some had a lot of partners and probably have an STD collection.
At 30 women start loosing attractiveness and I'm no longer a teen willing to put up with anything because of hormones.

Many of us got burned in our twenties and gave up trying.

[Asker]

You sound pretty depressed. Doesn't seem to relate to my post that much.

[Fromdusktilldawn]

To me this sounds realistic of how it sadly is

[Asker]

That may be so but hell I still feel just as happy as I did in my 20...

[Finchie40]

I don’t allow age to be a deciding factor on who I like , it’s the chemistry and connection that matters and of course she has to be legal age of consent , but I like to think I am wise enough not
To go for a girl that is under legal age lol so age to me is just a number , it’s the person that matters and the connection and chemistry. Her and I have together that’s where the full attraction comes into play , is when her and I have that together. So your age wouldn’t bother me what so ever if we had that together. So if I was you I wouldn’t really hold age as an issue, I have met girls younger than me that were way more maturer than girls my age or older , all that matters is her and I hit it off and attracted to each other , I am not after her age

[notwoke]

Pay attention, by this age I have a great understanding of this.
I assume you actually want a 30 yr old "very eligible" man, not some shmuck who makes less than you with a beer gut and can't hold a conversation. That lesser man IS available to you. The man you want has a 20 yr old girl that is equal to you in every way available to him and he knows she has 10 more years of "usable" sex left than you do, and she looks better than you naked and is happy with less materials things than you are. Look for a 40 yr old man.

[Asker]

I actually do want a older man who is 40... I don't want a guy near my age..

[Asker]

I don't want a 'very eligible man' I just want a guy who can feel the same way as I do about not wanting kids...

[notwoke]

this man is very available to you. Although I'm older than 40, a 30 or 37 year old decent looking woman,( does not need to be a 10) who is warm, pleasant and not a financial train wreck sounds great. This woman is hard to find, especially with no kids, she is a unicorn. Start looking where smarter men congregate, I. E, not a bar.

[Asker]

I see, so how does a guy near my age feels about a person like me?

[notwoke]

not having kids and not being broke helps a lot. Of course men are going to also favor the best looking women they think they can get and the closer you are to early twenties the better. there's no reason you can't get an acceptable, stable, guy with a job that is equivalent to your attractiveness

[Asker]

Okay, wish me luck with all this... Have a great day. Thanks.

[RichSD]

I'm in my early 50s, but I still want to start a family. That is why I wouldn't date anyone older than 30 even if they wanted kids, let alone someone in your case. However, there are definitely some guys who would be into a forever empty nest. Just not most of us.

[Asker]

Its called the empty nest huh...

[HighValue]

I personally do want kids and that is one of the main reasons for me.
For the people that don't want kids it shouldn't be a problem for them.

[Asker]

So you would get with a younger girl for having kids?

[HighValue]

That is one of the reasons. Another main reason is they get along with me more often. They have similar interests (most women from my age group, even when I was in my 20s or in high school) didn't enjoy things like board games, table Top RPGs, video games, riding bikes, fitness, fantasy/sci-fi movies/books, etc. and the younger women in my life experiences tend to be more caring towards men's feelings and realize that some men need emotions in a relationship and to feel cared about (not just sex).
I can't even be friends with women close to my age (again, not just now, but also when I was younger they were never compatible with me). I disagree with their morals a lot of the time. That is why I have stayed single for extended periods of time avoiding it all together. I'd rather be by myself than be with the wrong person.

[Asker]

I always got along with older people, I never got along with a guy my age or younger... People guess I'm 21 or whatever...

[Cowboy6666]

Well I am 32 and I prefer a lady around my age who is mature, loyal to me.
I dont want kids but I also love sex a lot.
I dont know if I would find a lady in my life with similar thinking :/

[Jay3344]

You’re fine, I’m in my 30’s and feel the same. No plans for kids and I steer clear of women who have them.

[Anonymous]

What? I love women my age more then anything, I loved them even when I was 20 they are so elegant and in connection with their body and mind

[ecfresh]

It’s not a turn off.