Do you think ghosting is childish?

[Nazgol]

& should be reserved for kids? I don't know how on earth grownup adults are ghosting!

[WonderBell99]

Ghosting is certainly immature. I’ve been ghosted a lot before and trust me, it sucks big time. I would rather they be honest and talk to me about it and be upfront about their intentions than ghost me. I ONLY ghost perverts and rude people. But even with them, I usually let them know that their behavior is unacceptable and then block them.

I’m not the type of person who’s too childish or scared to let someone know what’s bothering me. At the same time, I’m not rude when I do it either. I usually try to be considerate of others feelings. If they are persistent on not leaving me alone even after I told them so, then I simply just block them. I know that ghosting is going to hurt no matter what.

I think one of the main reasons why people ghost is because if they change their mind about that person, they can give a lame excuse like: “oh I’m sorry, my grandma was sick, so I was taking care of her” even when I clearly knew that they were online posting stories on Instagram every day. It’s incredibly disrespectful and cowardly. I would move on and block the person if they ghost me. It’s not worth it.

[WonderBell99]

It’s kind of like an easy way out for ghosters, I guess. Because if they give a reason, then they’re gonna have to give an explanation. So laziness is also a contributory reason

[zeitgeist057]

If you " let them know that their behavior is unacceptable and then block" I don't even consider that ghosting.

Ghosting is just dropping off, without saying anything.

[Anonymous]

Ugh I don't know. I went on a date after not dating over a year. The guy is really nice and that’s what made me go on a date with him to begin with. But I’m taller than him and he’s more Petite than I am. And it just made me feel big. Which I’m not I’m 5’4’’ n 115 lbs. I’m not use to this feeling. So I’ve kinda been slower to respond and trying to show no enthusiasm. I don't know what to do because he doesn’t seem to get it. He is a nice guy but I’m not romantically attracted to him. I just goggled how to let someone know after one date. And all responses say you should say something to I had a good time but I didn’t feel a connection. But I don't know that seems so rude to me. I’ve never done online dating before. In person dating people just use to get it. I’ve never once had for tell a guy straight up I’m not interested they just understood it from the vibe. Why is this so different now. If I texted a guy I only meet once and he didn’t respond I’d clearly know he wasn’t interested. I’m not saying ghosting a person u had a full blown relationship with is okay but after one date? I really have to tell you? Shouldn’t u arrive at that conclusion after it takes me 3 hrs to respond to a good morning text? I don't know am I wrong?

[zeitgeist057]

I think it's not too much trouble to send one simple text being clear. Just that you didn't get COVID, or die in some other way, or have an accident, or meet someone else, or etc, etc. There's literally hundreds of reasons you might not text after a date or be slow to respond to a good morning text. Clear communication eliminates all those "what if..."s, and lets the dude move on or freak out (in which case fine, stop responding, block, whatever, but you're not ghosting at that point, you were clear.)

[globetrotter22]

Just a FYI I define ghosting as when you message someone and they intentionally don’t message you back and/or block you (when you did nothing fundamentally wrong).

Some women think ghosting is when a guy just stops initiating contact although the guy would most likely message back if contacted. I do not define that as ghosting. For example i went on a date with a girl a month ago who I lost interest in (she’s an alcoholic). I stopped messaging her but if she messaged me and asked what’s up I would be honest with her. I did not “ghost” her.

Anyway there is some really weird Benjamin button bullshit going on with people nowadays. It’s not just young people doing this either. Grown ass adults over 30 “ghost” and it’s pathetic. It’s been done to me twice in the last 3 years.

[Luopio27]

I understand that for celebrities and so popular people get hundreds of date requests a day that there is no time to do anything.. I know some people can be so manipulative emotionally that ghosting and hiding is the only way to get them to back off for good.


Nit in the end, rejection, no matter how kindly or awfully it is delivered, its still the truth that hurts, the truth that cannot be touched. Rejection itself hurts like a knife.


Ghosting should still be avoided as much as possible. Never know who knows who, you know!

[Account]

If someone decides to ghost me, they do not owe me any explanation, unless we are very very close and even then I wouldn't get mad.
Such things happen, people grow distant for numerous reasons. I have no time to be concerned about that. It is pointless.
I have a huge ego, but I prefer wasting a part of myself on something more beneficial instead on worrying on who ghosted me and why.

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

Absolutely. I understand not wanting to hurt someone’s feelings and just wishing it would all go away… But ghosting is immature and the easy way out - For them… Which hurts the other person even more. It’s selfish to be honest.

[Moose304]

Depends on the situation. If the couple can handle the breakup as adults and move on yes ghosting is pathetic. The thing is some can't. It's important to remember most relationships break up because of infidelity. It's important for the betrayed to get OUT of that toxic situation ASAP! If nothing else just for a week or so to catch their breath and decide the future. This can't happen when the cheater goes all psycho on them and blows up their phones and starts showing up on their jobs etc etc. There is three women I have had to "ghost". I blocked them on my phone, on all social media, and in the security office of my residence, their photos are on the board so the guards know to call the police because they have violated protective orders. So, ghosting can be both childish and childlike, but unfortunately can be necessary!

[Msputiton]

Well it's more just about fear. They are afraid to deal with any inconvenience so they ghost.

But i also find it surprising how many people lose they minds over it.

I mean someone decides to stop talking to you, they don't really owe anyone an explanation, unless they are in a committed relationship.

It could be the reason they ghosted someone in the first place.
Ya know this sense of entitlement and controlling behavior.

Also the feelings the person getting ghosted could also only be one way.
Like if you are all into someone who really could careless about you.
They really ain't gonna take the time to say goodbye.
I think take it less seriously and just move on.
I actually see lots of people really hold on to this like this was the end of the world

[jshm2]

Don't be silly.

Ghosting is adults turning away when they don't want to get any more involved. Childish would be digging the hole deeper and wasting both your times to a situation that is going to lead to one of both of you walking away anyway.

Much better to not waste time, and cut contact there and then.

[Aerissa_Jade]

I think it is, people want to avoid confrontation and that is their way out. I've seen girls ghost boyfriends, it is how they break up with them, guys ghost their entire family. Rather than talk about the problem, they just cut them out of it.

These aren't for major reasons either, some one said some stupid comment and ghost, now the rest are wondering what.

Then after so long, person wants to have contact again but really doesn't know how to reach out after ghosting them.

[hahahmm]

Most guys would only ghost you because YOU're a stalker and didn't listen to the other 20 times they begged you to stop stalking OR you're a cheating whore and it's the best way for him to keep himself from doing something you really won't like to you (verbally or otherwise) so he moves on 100%. In these cases you don't deserve anything.

[Robertfootball]

Nope. I ghosted a girl that had me in the friendzone for 2 1/2 years and don’t regret it one bit. First year and a half was fine, second year she got to where she started asking me for money and favors all the time. It was like that was the only time she’d text me, when she needed something. It wasn’t like before where she’d text me like normal. That’s probably why I stuck it out as long as I did because things weren’t always that way. So I just got fed up being used and ghosted her.

[Medicalbug]

I only ghost people who harass me. I let people know I’m not interested or busy, but I don’t feel obligated to talk to them if they don’t take that seriously and keep contacting me or expecting an answer. Also ghosting to me is a sign of no interest - I just take it as a no and move on.

[The_sweet_brat]

Yes and no. It depends on the situation.

If you have already told that person that you are not interested and they keep texting you, then I would say that it's okay to ghost them, or hell, take it a step further and block them.

However if you don't tell them anything and just ghost them that is a bit rude, and it's as simple as saying you're not interested.

[VanillaSalt]

Lmao. I know kids that behave better then 30 yr olds… but let’s be honest a minute. If I’m honest and you don’t like my opinion you throw a fucking fit. It’s common on both sides… I’ve been ghosted it’s stupid but so it the effort I have to go through to even find a worthwhile women. Don’t bitch about it just don’t do it because frankly nobody cares what you or others think and humans are just hypocritical fools.

[Commander_Red]

Unless it's for safety reasons, yes, it's childish. When did communication become such a scary thing? If you don't like someone or don't have time for a relationship, just tell them. Don't ghost them and make them wonder what went wrong. I can at least respect them afterwards. If you ghost me, I just lose respect for you.

[DiegoO]

That's exactly what happened with someone I knew. She just never opened up and be honest. Eventually you get tired and ignore that person.

[genericname85]

no, what people do is a result of their previous experiences. i think that considering this "childish" is mostly ignorant. it can certainly stem from a childish inability to take accountability for you actions but it can also stem from negative experience with horrible people, where ignoring them has just proven to be the best solution for the problems they threw at you.

thinking about weirdos and stalkers here.

[silkjames]

Ghosting is last resort in some situations some people just don't understand when u have told them your allset and they keep pushing like it's cute or something sometimes that's all a parson can do when our person don't listen just ghost there ass now they know u not playing 😂

[Wraith_Cemetery]

Ghosting someone is really childish. The only reasonable time to ghost someone would be if and when you're in physical danger. Otherwise, the grown up thing to do would be to tell the person you no longer want to talk to them and give a reason why.

[Danny_dan92]

I think so yeah, I think people do it cause they don’t want to hurt the person’s feelings though.


Imagine being so crazy for someone and think something will happen between you and them and then they drop a bomb on you… most people would be very emotionally crushed

[CallmeTheKnight]

I wouldn't call it childish, but it does show that people don't like to be upfront or clear on where things are headed. The people usually affected by ghosting are:

Those getting too invested too early.

Those that are not picking up on or ignoring the cues/signs

Those that get their hopes up just because they're talking to someone

Those that never learn from past mistakes.

[DiegoO]

"who are affected by ghosting?"

If you care for someone, inevitably you'll feel unease if that person ghost you!

[CallmeTheKnight]

It's not for you to say what one is affected by. You can care and not be bothered by them choosing to cease contact with you. Many people, including myself, don't hold such expectations of people to put anything them. If you get ghosted, you're well aware of where to you stand with someone.

[DiegoO]

Not true. Ghosting is NOT a conclusive act. It actually leave inconclusive many things. If you care for someone and there is in fact a peaceful relation between you and that person; ghosting should never be an option. Also, if you are the one ghosted (assuming you care for the person who ghosted you) you'll seek for answers. It's natural to be concern and try contact a beloved one who isn't responsive. Been obsesive about it is somwthing else.

[CallmeTheKnight]

Actually, you won't have to seek answers because ghosting is done with intention. Just doing so is obsessive and very unhealthy. You can care all you want, but you can't pull an answer out of someone who doesn't want to talk.
Disagree all you want, but at the end of the day, when someone ghosts you, they don't want to talk to you.

[DiegoO]

I mean, if you thought you were on good terms with ↪️a beloved one⚠️ and then you suddenly get ghosted; is important to be clear about, why?* Sure, you might not get an answer at all, but only the effort to say *I am here, how are you? (among other things to clarifye everything is Ok), would send the message that you're open to a future contact.

Now, what I explained is more related to a first time experience with a person. When it becomes too often with the same person, obviously you become numb to it.

I trully don't understand ghosting, beyond situations where your wellbeing is in danger; but yeah, if I agree with you in something, is that it's pointless to even begging contact (in my perspective: when its done repeatedly by the same person).

[DonkeyDan]

Yes it's completely ridiculous and even kids should learn it's the wrong thing to do. People only do it because they can't face conflict these days. Back before texts and called ID you had to deal with your problems.

[Alwayreckles93]

It is extremely childish , I mean are these people still stuck in highschool. We're adults not teens. I rather have someone be straight forward and honest rather then live me wondering what the hell is going on.

[ThoseCognacEyes]

Depends on who you ask, some people deem it justifiable as an easy escape when they don’t want to confront someone as a mean of preserving their energy and all that bullshit. I personally think it’s childish af and shows cowardice.