At what point in your dating life did you consider all women the same?

[SolitarySolace]

For me it was when I was falsely accused in college. And that was after being cheated on by every women I was with before that experience. Now I just end up going soft just to get heartbroken and bolster my emotional defenses while raising my resentment towards women through all the hurt I have experienced either in the past, am currently feeling, and will feel down the road. I try my best to avoid catching feelings. I have no female friends what so ever. I stopped using dating apps. I don’t go out with the intent of meeting anyone new. But I somehow still end up getting hurt again and again and again. And then am told they’re not all the same 😂 must be me then, I guess.

[Kaamraj]

I seriously sympathize with you because I was also false accused by a woman of sexual harassment while we were in the elevator. She told a couple of friends of hers that I had touched her inappropriately and, on their goading, they wrote a letter to the authorities. But unluckily for her there was CCTV in that lift where it clearly showed that I was standing more than an arm's length away from her and with both hands working my phone. So, I decided to go on the offensive because what she did was gave an application to the authorities and not a formal complaint so the plan was that on receipt of the application it would be them who escalated it into a complaint, but on preliminary investigation it was found false. Now if the application had been disposed there and then, it would not have left a record and they would have been free to make another allegation, and this time make it seem that I really did do something. So, I filed a counter complaint.

The authorities were very hesitant and didn't want to register a complaint, but I forced them to, they didn't even call her in for questioning but called her and asked her what happened. She said that she had anxiety and depression and part of it was my fault and she realistically imagined that I had done something. Okay, so to make a long story short - all I got from the authorities was a letter saying that so and so had filed an application against me and it was found "unsubstantiated" on preliminary investigation. - Note that it said nothing about false allegation or registering a false complaint. Off the record they told me to not even be in the same room as her.

Now my advice to you is that the sexual marketplace and sexual interactions are absolutely brutal where advantage is held by nearly all women and a few high value men (genetically gifted, high socio-economic status, etc.) The only way to play this game is to become one of these men through your hard work and talent. There is no way around it. Else you're going to have to play with a severe handicap.

[DaySpring]

@SolitarySolace You're hurting and so I understand the lack of logic here.
If you got mugged and beaten by a few white guys would you blame all white guys and say they are the same?
Because that is literally what you're saying but about women.

What kind of environment do you meet these women in?
You're simply picking the wrong ones and that may be a reflection of you. Maybe you are similar to them or maybe you don't know how to vet people. Perhaps you do it all based off emotions.
I have never had any girl do this to me. I also have never dated a party girl. The problem with society is we operate as if we are still animals living in a cave. Good looks don't mean anything anymore. Character is what matters but your outdated body will tell you otherwise. Character is everything and most people don't vet a persons character in any thorough manner or in any manner that isn't passive.

@SolitarySolace It's not about being a nice guy or any of that. Don't fall for that.
We gotta stop blaming other people. We are the problem. Most people don't vet the people they let into their lives because they don't even know how. They aren't even aware they should be doing it really.

@SolitarySolace The best advice you will ever get is: You are the problem and you are the only solution.

[SolitarySolace]

Alright. So basically blame myself for having a love life and a type.

Maybe I should just stay single forever.

Oh wait, I’m already on track to do that! 😂 almost 8 years now and still going strong! Yet everybody thinks that’s a bad thing?

So I’m suppose to blame myself while seeking someone who MAY care enough Not to shit in my bed?

[DaySpring]

@SolitarySolace All due respect brother, you underestimate the power of taking responsibility...

It's not about whose fault it is. It's about taking responsibility for your life. Fault and responsibility do not go together. It's not your fault someone cheated on you but it is your responsibility to pick up the pieces that is your life. It's not fair but life isn't fair. You can blame them all you want and be the victim complaining all your life like most people do or you can figure out a way to overcome. Victims never do anything but sit there and wait for a hero.

As far as your type, you can like what you like but the right character and personality traits have to be there. Regardless of looks or interest, the character traits that lead to a healthy, happy, sustainable relationship have to be there. And that is just 1 small part of the vetting process. You have know intent and other things as well. Basic stuff really but a lot of people don't do this stuff.

Life requires us to grow or get out the way. You can't just blame all people who look like the people who hurt you dog. That right there should tell you that something is wrong with your thinking. You have to get to the core of the issue which is character. You gotta get a better understanding. Nothing wrong with wanting to be single... If really do. But that isn't the case with you. You are giving up and then creating a rationale so that it doesn't feel justified in your giving up. @SolitarySolace

[DaySpring]

so that you feel justified*

[Oigit]

I never really have. But I never really date hoping that it will turn into something serious and ensure the person I'm dating feels the same from the start. So it tends to be a fling that we both enjoy and part ways when it has ran it's course or when feelings start to get involved on one side or the other.

[bamesjond0069]

Their are hos and good girls. Almost every girl is a ho. Not every single one though so you got to pay attention and not just treat them all nasty. I don't know just I've dated so many women and they are all interchangeable. They have a pussy and they clean the house and cook me food. None are any different (except those who cannot cook or clean who are worse) except virgins who have something special to offer.

[SolitarySolace]

What if you don’t want to be with someone and prefer to be single? Does treating them nasty to keep them away when having Tourette’s syndrome doesn’t do the job be satisfactory?

What if I don’t plan on ever having sex? What if I want to stay virgin forever? That knocks quite a lot of women off the list even if I were actively seeking a sexless relationship. Everything is about having sex these days. Hell, women use sexualization for views and attention they don’t even want! 😂 fuck, they’re even fighting over abortion which isn’t even a woman’s right! And if it were it should also be a man’s right as well! I bring this up because it’s a part of the same topic of sex.

[bamesjond0069]

No comment on living like a monk or tourettes. No experience or desire for either.

[CallmeTheKnight]

Never. All women are not the same. Everyone is different.
Just avoid:
College girls/women
Mentally ill women
Dramatic women
Attention seekers
Openly sexual or flirtatious
Those always on the phone

[Philyouup]

Dude you look at all women being the same, and every woman you dated cheated on you. That says more about you than it does them. You need to take inventory of your life and see what it is you’re doing wrong

[AviatorTom]

I never have... every woman is different. Sure, they have some common traits but I've never met two identical women.

[Rockstarrrrr]

Nah.. They're not all that same.. It's just that you're a nice and sensitive guy... And that's exactly the type of partner toxic and abusive people are looking for.. You gotta be smart...

[SolitarySolace]

What do you consider a smart approach then? Because as far as I know women blame both nice/good guys and the bad ones. They clump us into the same category and expect us not to do the same to them? That’s pretty hypocritical to me

[Rockstarrrrr]

I didn't say a smart approach... I meant being smart when you're reading and choosing people...

[SolitarySolace]

Ah, right, cuz that’s easy as fuck 😂 it’s like telling a guy with Tourette’s to stop doing their tics. OH WHOA YOUVE CURED ME! Thank you! *walks away doing their tics even harder*

[Rockstarrrrr]

What's so hard about that? It's either you feel appreciated or not.. and if they think you're unreasonable or too demanding.. Then fuck em... Drop them...

[SolitarySolace]

Who said I’m not dropping them? Who said I’m even trying in the first place to find someone? I get soft at times and my defenses faulter. Doesn’t mean I’m actively seeking someone out to ruin my life.

[Rockstarrrrr]

Dude, you're full of contradictions.. Go see a therapist... although I highly suspect you already do..

[SolitarySolace]

I do, yeah. In fact, I meet with mine this evening. We discuss this type of thing and he says as long as I’m happy that’s all that matters. He also believes that someone might come along and change my mind. That part I don’t believe. But i don’t elaborate on that. I just tell him sure and leave it at that.

[Rockstarrrrr]

I agree with him... but it's not guaranteed that you'll find that person... Good luck 👍

[Anonymous]

I don't consider all the same but it doesn't affect me anyways because I'm good living with sanhui doll

[Anonymous]

Even though most women don't mind having a high body count, there are still those that are sweet and caring and don't. But good luck in finding them.

[CloudMassacre]

I never will, because in my experience, women are different

[SolitarySolace]

True. They do the same shit in different ways.

[CloudMassacre]

They also do different shit in different ways

[SolitarySolace]

I have yet to see that happen. When the day comes where a women doesn’t throw my heart in a grinder then start attacking men as if we are monsters, I’ll consider changing my views. But it hasn’t changed in almost 8 years and I don’t see it changing in the coming years either

[CloudMassacre]

Nearly 4 billion women haven’t had anything to do with you

[SolitarySolace]

True. But I’m pretty sure by the time I’m 40, I will have dealt with enough to say that all of the women I have had experiences with have been the same. Would that be a better way of saying it? Instead of “all women” it’s just “all the women I’ve had the misfortune to meet?” Because to me, as an individual, that’s all

[Jltakk]

Yeah around 25. Sort of accepted my fate since.