Someone who doesn’t want to label you both but doesn’t want you to see other people is?

[Anonymous]

so I think I’m stuck in a SITUATIONSHIP or I don't know what it’s called lol. I’ve like this guy that’s about 10 years older than I am a lot. In the beginning of it all it was rough because I had personal stuff going on and he would make time to see me and all and I didn’t go with it. I tried being with someone else but I broke that off and I couldn’t take it no more I kept thinking about this man a lot always. We started to see each other more and more in the recent 2 years and well he told me that he doesn’t see other women “only me” and that he enjoys what we have going on , etc etc. I asked if we want to make this official I think it’s about time we do? He said he doesn’t want to label what we have going on. I had joked about a guy asking me out on a date and he quickly said “you better not ! I better be the only man you seeing “ and he got really angry. I’m like cmon then what? Ugh ! I’m so annoyed already guys with this man. I’m not a toy to play with and this whole time I’ve been committed to only him and he has too supposedly but he doesn’t want to LABEL THINGS like he said. I’m stuck and I’m on the edge already. I’m FRUSTRATED 😡

[unknownforever]

That is definitely frustrating. I guess the best way to think about it is like this, "why are you putting your life on pause because he is not ready". You should tell him that too. Whether you want to get married, have kids or what not, tell him you have goals. You don't want to be in a situationship with no indication of things moving further. You have to put him on the line. I know it sucks, especially if he feels like "the one", but if he can stop you from moving forward but not take the next step for you guys, then he isn't worth it. Please don't put your life on hold for a person who doesn't even know what they're doing. So definitely speak with him about it. See if you can find out why he doesn't want to take the next step. But eventually, he is going to need to realise that it's either the both of you in it together, or you with an amazing man. He can't have best of both worlds.

[MzAsh]

Not liking labels is definitely a red flag. If you really like this guy, I’d investigate what exactly is his motivation for not wanting to make it official. It’s definitely suspicious.