Why do girls assume my gender if it's offensive?

[hostboy__fastestlaps]

Let's say I ask for their number at the gym after having introduced ourselves. I asked a hot girl for her number and she said, no she has a boyfriend. But wait, I thought assuming one's gender was offensive? I didn't say I was a guy or a male or whatever. I never assumed her gender either.

Politics aside, why does every woman (especially beautiful women) assume a man's gender just by looking at that person's facial and body structure?

Updates

1 y

I identify as male, but let's say if I didn't identify with any gender and I asked a girl (or anybody) out and they said they have a "boyfriend". Would their intention be transphobic or genderphobic?

[snackthatsmilesback]

I think they're saying "I have a boyfriend" to mean they have a partner. Not to mean specifically boy and they would be open to a girlfriend. Most people aren't polygamous.

Also most people assume a TON about someone, not just gender. That's why most people who don't look stereotypically like their gender have to correct people all the time. You'll just have to correct them if they get it wrong too. And then hopefully they accept that and don't keep calling you the wrong one.

Absolutely you can call them out as well and tell them it offended you, but that probably won't go well because people don't like to be called out. Especially in public, by a stranger.

[genericname85]

"assuming" someones gender is not offensive and everyone who says that, should be called out on their bullshit. because gendering someone is not some fucked up oppressive social act it is an individual describing what they see. and what they see "can" not be in line with what reality is sometimes. however you disagreeing with what they describe to see does NOT entitle you to dictate their expression of what they see. one can kindly ask to be reffered to as the opposite gender but you don't get to pick the words that other people use.

[Anonymous]

I think she’s just stating that SHE has a boyfriend, doesn’t have anything to do with your gender. A lesbian could approach her and ask her for her number but she’s still gonna say that she has a boyfriend. The only thing she did was that she assumed that you were interested in her hence why she rejected you by saying she has a boyfriend - again, nothing to do with your gender

[Jessica405]

I have always said your gender only matters to you. I don't care what you think you are. If you look like a guy, act like a guy, you get called him/he etc.

I cannot see how saying a true fact that she has a boyfriend has any bearing on your actual or perceived gender.

[OlderAndWiser]

Are you really trying to be that woke? If so, I understand why you aren't having much luck with the ladies!

[Jamie05rhs]

@OlderAndWiser It was satire. Lol

[OlderAndWiser]

@Jamie05rhs On this site, there are people who would actually ask such a question with serious intent.

[Jamie05rhs]

Lol. Touché.

[Hawkfrosty]

She was assuming your intention. She probably thought you were trying to make a move on her when you asked for her number, and stated she had a boyfriend to let you know she was neither available or interested. Nobody assumed anyone's gender here.

[hostboy__fastestlaps]

But what if I looked and sounded like a girl? Like exactly? No girl ever says that to a fellow girl

[Hawkfrosty]

Okay, I get where you're coming from with this, but the short answer is that usually girls will treat people asking for their number as straight until given reason to believe otherwise. They don't usually use the boyfriend line on other girls because unless the other girl is very clearly a lesbian, they don't assume they're trying to make a move on them.

[Anonymous]

Her telling you she has a boyfriend isn't assuming your gender, you are not the boyfriend. I'm sure her and the boyfriend have discussed what their preferred pronouns are and she used his pronouns accordingly.

And most strangers that you meet, don't give a shit what your preferred pronouns are so they aren't going to ask. People have other things going on and their lives don't revolve around you.

[AviatorTom]

I'm so confused. What do you want her to assume based on your facial and body structure? That you're actually a woman? An alien?

[MCheetah]

I think only retards DON'T assume people's genders.

[Espresso-Grande]

How does saying "I have a boyfriend" assume your gender?

[Espresso-Grande]

That's phrase doesn't mean she's assumes your gender.

[Espresso-Grande]

And so what if she assumed you're male. It's her right to have that opinion

[Caunsos]

She never assume your gender she simply didn't not want give your number because she in a relationship with someone who's gender she dose know.

God you must be a dumb fuck.

[Anonymous]

I’m pretty sure if a lesbian girl asked the same thing, she’d also reply she has a boyfriend. Nothing is implied.

[Fuentes]

You live in candy land, don't you?

[fireforeffect]

You seem to have a mental health issue.